Get Excited! How the Cycle of Overeating is a Life-Changer

Please let’s forget the past the future looks bright ahead! Let’s live differently, riskier, happier.

Hello Everyone!

Welcome to April! As always it’s important to read the Aunt Bea booklet. You’ll find her to your right in the box under my circle bio. She’s supposed to land in your email, but sometimes she ends up in spam. If you lost her just let me know: Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll shoot her right to you! 🙂

On with the show!

This article first appeared in SixtyandMe.

Pearl One

I told myself, this time will be different. And it was, but only because I was different.

Here’s how it unfolded.

Like so many of us, I’d lost weight before – from kid-hood into my mid-30s – only to find the pounds pile back on again and again.

However, this time would be different because while – of course – I wanted to lose, my primary mission was new: I was going to figure out which habits I most needed to preserve my hard-won loss.

I was done losing weight only to go back to square one. Done. Done. Done.

My new plan – after doing a ton of research — was to train my brain to embed healthier eating habits that would last forever. And as I did, it became obvious to me that while we’re constantly admonished to “eat this, not that,” the so-called experts know little about how our powerful brains affect overeating itself; that whatever we put into our mouth is merely the end result of a sophisticated cognitive process.

I started to have a sneaking suspicion that changing our thoughts might change our results.

My Favorite Thinking Tool.

Of the mind shifts I made while losing, my favorite tool was what I ended up calling the Cycle of Overeating.

Using the cycle meant that I could pinpoint where I was on the pie-chart at any given moment, and thereby make a better intervention and – with practice – change the final outcome. ♥

Pearl Two

When I’m talking overeating I’m not talking about a slice of cheesecake after dinner. By overeating I mean binging an entire cheesecake after everyone has gone to bed.

Take a look:

Cycle of Overeating

The Purple Slice.

The purple slice represents our feelings (e.g., we’re thrilled, angry, disgusted and so forth). Some might have one feeling only that triggers overeating, while others can experience a bevy of strong feelings and head straight for the Easter candy (me).

As an example, let’s say that our trigger-feeling is jubilance. When we’re in the purple slice, here’s how our internal self-talk might go, I may have landed the job!! If I did, I deserve to party!!

We’re at the squiggly-trigger line when we receive the actual call saying, “You’re hired!!”

It’s Not Easy Being Green.

At that, we bounce into the green where we overeat because we “deserve” it: we might party alone in front of Hulu with a towering bowl of ice cream, or go out with friends and face plant into a massive margarita and entree at our favorite Mexican.

It’s important to note that overeating isn’t just an “at home in secret, alone” activity. We can also overeat at parties, restaurants, with the gang at lunch, at the movie theater and so on.

And Finally: Rude-Red.

After satiating a craving, we’re then hurled into the red slice where our powerful pre-frontal brains – finally awake – growl, what have you done?! We were doing so well on our healthy eating plan, and you go and ruin it. Don’t even look at me. I’m so fed up.

A very rude pre-frontal.

In response to our brain’s anger, we either clamp down hard on ourselves, expecting nothing less than perfection as we attempt to make zero mistakes on our eating plan, or we utterly give up (I’m done trying. Women over 50 just can’t drop weight. Wendy probably had lipo anyway.).

When we go the “perfection” route, we eventually give up anyhow. We might eat “perfectly” for five or six days, but when real life intrudes, we’re back to “messing up” again.

Days, weeks, months or even years later we again try a new eating plan only to hop back onto The Cycle of Overeating once more.

And on it goes. ♥

Pearl Three

In March I used this pearl slot to talk about using time for our own best outcome. In April we’ll talk: “Let’s Live Differently”.

How to Step Off the Cycle.

Leaving the cycle in your dust isn’t a “one and done” thing (I wish). It’s more the work of a lifetime: when we’re besieged by cravings here’s how to use the cycle:

• Become crystal clear about which emotions trigger you (if they all trigger you, that’s important to know too).
• Learn to identify where you are on the cycle so you can step in and create a new experience for yourself. (I’m super sad; I haven’t been triggered yet, but I’m getting close.)
• Establish new responses for your trigger emotions (it was life-altering when I realized that taking a page-turner to bed was more fun than inhaling Oreos in the evening).
• Developing reliable ways to stay clear of the red slice. When we beat-up on ourselves for being in the green slice (overeating), it’s like screaming and yelling, and expecting perfection from your fur-kids. You wouldn’t be awful to your fur-baby, so don’t be awful to yourself.
• I’ve said it a gazillion times: if being cruel to ourselves worked, we’d all be a size 4. When I have a green experience I’m extra kind to myself. I might buy flowers for my desk, do my nails or brush my kitty. Being good to ourselves will catapult us out of rude-red. Seriously.

If it’s seemed to you as if losing weight is super hard, that’s because losing weight is super hard.

But here’s the kicker: it’s okay to tell ourselves that this time we’re living differently. Forever we’ve been encouraged to look for answers to our weight issues in the wrong place (what we put into our mouths) when – all along – we had the glittering treasure that is our brain with us the entire time. (Sorry, didn’t mean to go Glinda the Good on you.) ♥

Pearl Four

Food! I have a gum story. About eight years ago, I’d unwrap a piece of sugary bubble gum in the afternoons and chomp it until dinner. Minimal calories. Seemed harmless enough. Turns out, full of harm. Chewing that gum every day for months, maybe even years (I can’t remember), and one day my jaw locked up. No pain, thankfully, but I’d given myself TMJ. Of course I stopped chewing gum immediately hoping that would help. Nothing helped.

It sure would have been cool to have one less creaking, cracking body part to deal with. My TMJ bugs me in particular because I can see directly how I caused it.

All this is to say, those small sticks or chunks of gum might look innocent and sweet, but danger lurks. Don’t be like me, stay vigilant! ♥

Pearl Five

Pay attention to your patterns. The ways you learned to survive may not be the ways you want to continue to live.” – Dr. Thema Bryant-Davis ♥

I have a request: if you’ve been reading the Inspired Eater for awhile, I’d love to hear your story. Which posts spoke to you? Which posts seem kind of lame? And if you’ve only been reading for a short stretch, I’d love to hear why you’ve jumped on board. I’d appreciate everyone’s feedback so much because most of the time it’s just me and the cursor. 🙂

My tiny wrinkled babies turn 19 this weekend. They want to have a picnic-dinner in one of their favorite climbing trees in our suburb’s downtown. Yes, a picnic. In the tree. I’m like, “I love you both, but I will be at the picnic table beneath the tree.” They might’ve grown, but they’re still kids at heart. (Staying goofy appears to be the foundation to a happy life.)

Make it a beautiful, goofy weekend!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

I’ve been asked if I could include something like Buy me a Coffee on the Inspired Eater. So if you feel up to sending a coffee, I am a devotee. You’ll find the coffee “button” to your right. And, as always, thank you so much for reading the Inspired Eater. ♥♥♥