Hello Thrivers!!
It is so exciting to hear about your successes! I’m also hearing how frustrated you are once you’re in the preserving-the-loss mode. This is where the new change takes place. Pearl One gets into the details about preserving your very precious loss for the long-run.
No longer will preserving our loss get short-shrift as maintenance got back-in-the-day. Preserving our loss is now taking center stage.
Pearl One
Let’s keep talking about forever preserving your original loss. I’m learning that some Thrivers reach their preferred weight, but can’t seem to stay in the weight-window they picked for themselves.
Some people lose too much weight to the great concern of people around them, and others struggle with gaining.
Life has changed and we’re no longer doing the old didn’t-really-work-anyhow maintenance thing. Let’s look at preserving your original loss as if you’ve been given a large, beautifully cut diamond to take great care of. That’s how precious your weight-loss is.
The main thing to do in the first years of preserving your original loss is to stay on your eating plan and deviating occasionally, add to it the REP and work on strengthening your habits.
The overriding self-talk is, “we don’t eat like that anymore.” And then show your brain how serious you are: pour salt over the calories or similar. Your brain is always watching what you’re doing and if you consistently give it the message, “I’m not playing around anymore. It’s not going to be easy, but I am turning away from junk-food and instead reading a book, walking the dog, or planning a future day-trip.”
I will always add: if you’re pining for junk-food, it means that you’re hungry for food-food. Also women over 50 sometimes feel really tired when they’re hungry. I still tell myself daily, “Reach for real food.”
Remind yourself daily that there are no short cuts to success and that “Nobody said it would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it.” Thank you Mae West for this quote-nugget.
Bottom Line
Feed your mind well. Find the quotes that speak to you and sprinkle them throughout your life. Even better: memorize the quotes. This micro-step has helped me so much through the years.
Work to strengthen your habits. You want to be handed a beautiful box of donuts and say, “Yeah, I don’t do donuts anymore, but thanks for the thought.” (Hint: you can have a donut in about three to five years of preserving).
When preserving your loss, don’t let yourself move from the sandbox at the park to the freeway in one fell swoop. Take yourself in stages. Getting too thin? Whole-milk cottage cheese, not junk-food or large portions of fettuccine. Gaining? Re-revisit your habits and write in your journal about what’s working and what’s not.
And plan, plan, plan how you’ll step more firmly onto the Smart Eating Path.
It always comes back to “don’t get cranky, get curious.” ♥
Pearl Two
Have I told you guys about the first junk-food? Back in 1883 at the World’s Fair in Chicago, Cracker Jack made its debut on the national stage. (Candy existed decades earlier and honey has been around forever, but Cracker Jack was the first mass-produced junk food.)
Nobody could possibly have foreseen that the simple snack would develop into a world-gone-wild junk-food landscape. Our moms and grandmas didn’t stand a chance at the tsunami of calories that flooded their world because the monster-wave did not come with instructions.
In response to our “Twinkie-lifestyle” the diet-cartel rode up on a white horse to save us from what I call the perfect storm: 1) fast-food 2) Grocery stores packed in junk-food and 3) restaurants that serve humongous-portion sizes of low-nutrition food.
Thing is, we didn’t need to be saved; what we’ve needed all along are real tools that’ll take us where we want to go.
What’s my point? That you and I — and our moms and grandmas – are the ones who’ve consistently accepted the blame when a diet “doesn’t work.” And after being consistently blamed for so long, we then develop a deep sense of shame.
We think, “Why can’t I do this?” “I regained the 50-pounds. What is wrong with me?!” “I’m to blame, I do overeat, it is my fault.”
You guys, this is how domestic-violence survivors talk. They say, “Well, if I hadn’t done blank, he wouldn’t have gotten so mad.” Until they see the reality of their situation, they take the blame over and over.
The reality of our situation is that we live in a food-porn culture. Until the junk-food phenomena goes the way of the cigarette (it’s a little different with junk-food, but it could be done) we need to stay dubious about the diet-cartel’s “help” and their money-making shenanigans.
My thought: let’s use the diet-cartel’s products as tools to help us trek up the “losing after 50 mountain.” But let’s stop seeing these companies as our rescuer. Their product is merely a tool that we might choose to use or not depending on our need at the moment. ♥
Pearl Three
Sequencing is taken directly from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). The purpose of sequences is to help us move from reacting to circumstances to responding. I encourage you to do a sequence a day in your journal. Powerful stuff.
Default-Sequence
I’m writing from a dear friend’s point of view:
- Situation (be very concrete): I weigh 250-pounds, I stand 5’5.
- Thought: I hate being this large and am beyond frustrated and angry with diets.
- Feeling: Furious at the whole damn thing of trying to lose, regain etc.
- Action: I talk a lot about how nothing seems to work.
- Result: I’d like to lose about a hundred pounds, but never do.
Chosen Thoughtful Sequence (a bridge)
- Situation (be very concrete): I weigh 250-pounds, I stand 5’5.
- Chosen thought: Times are changing. Maybe new, cutting-edge ideas are appearing in weight loss. Hmm. We’ll see.
- Feeling: Very wary, but with a sliver of hope.
- Action: Reads the latest and greatest of weight-loss in 2024.
- Result: After having some success on the intermittent diet, but I’d like to improve my habits around food, so I started to read the Inspired Eater blog and begin to work on my mind-set. ♥
Pearl Four
I just finished a book-dessert of the highest caliber. If you like an absorbing story line about a female friendship set in modern time history then you’ll love The Lion Women of Tehran by Marjan Kamali. Like The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini did for Afghanistan, Lion Women is now doing for Iran (just came out in July 2024). One of my favorite things in life is to learn about other cultures and their history while reading a gripping story line. ♥
Pearl Five
There are moments of frustration in life. You must build good relations to support you in these moments. You must also learn to encourage yourself and decide to stay encouraged in life.” ♥
Lailah Gifty Akita
i love this quote. Decide to stay encouraged. This thought is what I’m working to embed into my mind.
I’d love a comment below on how you’re doing while living on the Smart Eating Lifestyle.
Make it a wonderful week!
♥, Wendy
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I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. ♥
