Do you have a smart written plan for navigating disappointment?
Pearl One
I’m revisiting this post because I’ve internalized the story and I hope you will too. It’s a good one.
Did you know that Lisa Kudrow was rejected after a Saturday Night Live audition in 1990?
I’m just guessing, but Lisa likely auditioned for SNL, praying, hoping, and crossing every finger that she’d landed the job.
Then she got the call.
It wasn’t good. I’m guessing she went a little numb at first. She likely cried for the first day or two. I’m sure she was angry. Maybe she took in a movie to get her mind off that phone call, and in the evenings possibly had one or two glasses of wine with her ice cream.
“I remember being super disappointed,” Lisa told Vanity Fair, “because I thought, ‘maybe you’re one of those people for whom good things don’t happen.’”
I’m betting her negative self-talk finally turned into “I am one of those people for whom wonderful things happen!”
Four years after the failed SNL audition, Kudro introduced our planet to Phoebe Buffay.
My Point
Champions like Lisa Kudro — and the long list of SNL rejects, including John Mulaney, Tim Roberts, John Cusack, Rachel Bloom, Cameron Diaz, Geena Davis, Kevin Hart, Mindy Kaling, Ellie Kemper, Jim Carrey, and many more are especially skilled at not giving up on themselves. Each person likely felt awful for weeks after getting the call, but they dug in their heels and returned to the grueling climb up their mountainside.
As you go forward keep Lisa’s story close to your heart. There will be awful disappoints: How we handle the sad times is always up to us. ♥
Pearl Two
Our writing prompts for your journal
Given Lisa’s trek, write about you own
- If Lisa was “super disappointed” after the SNL phone call, how do you guess she managed to audition for Friends (four years later)?
- What are your triggers to hop off the smart eating path?
- How do you rally when you’ve felt “crushed”?
- Why don’t you just give up on smart eating? What propels you forward?
- What prominent person in our culture inspires you? And why?
- How does it sit with you to actually write up a plan — more like a contract with yourself — about how you’ll handle your various ways of nosediving off the Smart Eating Path. (Everyone nosedives, the question: what the plan for giving yourself a plan.
When a strong question is asked in front of a pad of paper and a pen (that works), the gems appear. ♥
Pearl Three
Sequencing is taken directly from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). The purpose of sequences is to help us move from reacting to circumstances to responding. I encourage you to do a sequence a day in your journal. Powerful stuff. Apply to your own life.
Automatic Sequence
- Situation (be concrete): Marianne is 52. Her doctor suggested a depression med. Her kids are in college.
- Initial thought: She had long thought that meds were a cop-out and never saw herself taking them.
- Feeling: She feels stuck and incapable of positive movement.
- Action: Marianne immerses herself in berating her body, missing her “babies” and ruminating on her “pathetic life.”
- Result: Rinse and repeat.
Chosen Sequence
- Situation (be concrete): Marianne is 52. Her doctor suggested a depression med. Her kids are in college.
- Chosen thought: I researched the depression meds and I might go for it. She tells herself that the kids being grown and on their own is a good thing and she encourages herself to be the best mom of young adults as possible.
- Feeling: She feels contemplative, and a little excited to move into this new chapter in life.
- Action: She contacts a nearby hospital to ask if the NICU could use a volunteer to “baby-rocker.” Along with baby-rocking Marianne found a nearby dance studio that has special classes for those who only want a great workout versus becoming a professional dancer. Her husband joins her.
- Result: Loving the dancing she and her husband have a new kind of fun together. ♥
Pearl Four
Our book-dessert pearl
I have a book for you today that I read about ten years ago. A friend learned English by watching I Love Lucy every day. (She grew up in India with English, but wanted to fit in with the U.S. way of speaking.) This is great book-dessert. Ball of Fire: The Tumultuous Life and Comic Art of Lucille Ball by Stefan Kanfer. A great and funny read when you want a book about a great and funny woman. ♥
Pearl Five
If you don’t make the time to work on creating the life you want, you’re eventually going to be forced to spend a lot of time dealing with a life you don’t want.” – Kevin Ngo ♥
If you enjoyed this post, I’d love it if you’d share it with your doctors, surgeons, and nurses. They appreciate info. they can pass onto their patients who are struggling with weight management. Thanks for spreading the word!
Enjoy the last days of August!
♥, Wendy
You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.
Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!!
I am not an expert, doctor, surgeon, nurse, dietician, or nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
