Today we’re modern cavewomen!
Hello everyone!
We have new thrivers – and welcome!! – I’m sharing five super important posts for you to read in pink below. The regular Monday post I send will make a lot more sense after you read the pink. And if you haven’t received your Aunt Bea copy just write to me at: Wendy@theInspiredEater.com and I’ll shoot it right to you.
- Begin Here
- This Metaphor Is My Constant Companion as I Preserve My Weight Loss After Age Fifty
- Brownies for Breakfast
- 6 Pillars of Losing Weight After Age 50
- How to Conquer Your Evening Sugar Cravings
Pearl One
Let’s talk important vocabulary that I infused into my supportive self-talk. Beating ourselves up internally might’ve once given the illusion of “helping,” but really ran us off the cliff.
Going Cavewoman
This is the name I give to the part of our brain that kept the saber tooth kitty from eating our greatest of grandmas. Back in the day, our girl was formidable at finding food and “overeating” whenever possible, knowing she’d store fat for the lean times when she needed every last calorie for her herself and her babies.
But today, you and I don’t live in her world, we live in food-gone-wild central and don’t need to eat every calorie in sight. As I’ve written, when our weight starts dropping, the cavewoman — perceiving the threat of hunger — wakes up and moves quickly to find the highest calories around. So, if I let myself get too hungry, the ice cream is always looking better and better, thanks to my cavewoman.
Keep your cavewoman chilled and sleeping in her cave by not panicking her. Hunger panics her. Small bites especially in the afternoons and evenings are how to keep her quiet and allow your prefrontal (handles logic and planning) to take the wheel.
The Modern Plateau
Remember plateaus from decades ago? How we’d be on a diet humming right along losing weight beautifully, until we hit a plateau and couldn’t get our weight to budge?
We were taught to believe plateaus were bad and that only linear progress mattered. And if our weight loss wasn’t linear we must “be doing something wrong.”
To make it all more confusing, in the middle of the last century, two guys came up with the “weight setpoint” theory saying that our weights will always return to each person’s genetic makeup.
But here’s what happened for me: I noticed that I’d lose five-pounds, and hit a plateau. I don’t know where I got the idea, but when I was losing the 55-pounds it occurred to me to call the plateaus “holding.” It seemed to me that if I “held” my new weight to a certain number for two weeks or more, I’d begin losing again. My thought is that my body needed time to get used to the new-normal and once my body was used to the new number, I would then go back to losing.
Your Eeyore and You
I’m about to sound heartless, but we’re now in a boundary-setting moment: when you’re putting so much effort into shifting to the Smart Eating Lifestyle, it’s too much to ask of yourself to also tolerate the Eeyore-people.
When you’re trying to bring something so important to life (your weight impacting your health both physically and mentally), plan to prune the sad sacks of your friends and family. You don’t need to hear, “Another diet?!” “It’ll never work.” “We’re all doomed.” Eyores might seem pathetic and cute, but they’re actually dangerous to getting to and sustaining a lifetime-weight loss.
In conclusion, keep your cavewoman quiet, embrace your plateaus and boot your Eeyores. ♥
Pearl Two
Our journal-writing pearl prompt.
- What do you think about your cavewoman brain and your prefrontal brain?
- When is your cavewoman active? When is your prefrontal most front-and-center?
- Can you imagine calling a plateau “holding” — while your weight stabilizes — when you’re shooting for a lifetime loss? Do you worry that it’ll feel too slow? What’s important about having a “fast” weight loss? How will you support yourself in slowing down?
- Who are the Eeyores in your life?
- When you think about your Eeyores, what feelings come up?
- Write about how you’ll handle the Eeyores.
- Now think about what you’d love to most hear from a supportive cheerleader. If there’s a cheerleader in your life — like you love Taylor Swift — what does she tell you on a daily basis? ♥
Pearl Three
Sequencing is taken directly from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). The purpose of sequences is to help us move from reacting to circumstances to responding. I encourage you to do a sequence a day in your journal. Powerful stuff. Apply to your own life.
Initial Sequence
- Situation (be super concrete): Nancy realizes that it’s Halloween in one month.
- Initial thought: She loves eating candy that she otherwise never sees and – let’s be honest — the Halloween candy is so cute and little.
- Feeling: Dread. Looking forward to the peanut butter cups, but she’s also feels angry at herself for succumbing to the candy every year. In the end, she thinks that the candy is so tiny that one can’t be a big deal.
- Action: Nancy keeps swinging from one end of the spectrum to other: I want candy, I shouldn’t eat candy. I want it, I shouldn’t eat it. Back and forth all month long.
- Result: She eats one Twix bar and is triggered into eating twelve small packages of Butterfingers, Peanut Butter Cups, and – who knew they had these — Peanut Butter M&M’s. After eating she goes into beating herself up mode.
Often people need to do a middle sequence right here that takes us to the following sequence.
Chosen Sequence
- Situation (be super concrete): Nancy realized that it’s Halloween in one month.
- Chosen thought: In the past she overate the candy. This October she wants to stay on her Smart Eating Path. She really doesn’t want to overdo the candy again.
- Feeling: pride that she’s choosing herself and her wants over the October candy-fest.
- Action: In a written-out plan, Nancy went over her calendar making note of when the obstacles will present in October. She finally determines that the grocery store and Costco are the biggest problems for her.
- Result: To keep herself tethered – like an umbilical cord – to her October plan, she re-reads her plan throughout the month making notes on what is working and what’s not. Given her plan, she decides that she’ll eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (or something similar) in the car before walking into the grocery store. And she makes it to November having eaten zero Halloween candy.
Pearl Four
I’m just now diving into Snow Flower and the Secret Fan: A Novel by Lisa See. I’ve never read a Lisa See novel, but hear she’s remarkably wonderful. This title — Snow Flower — was tied with The Island of Sea Women as being my online book club’s most favorites out of all Lisa See’s work (she’s prolific, so it’s surprising that I’m just now getting to her).
If you’ve read and liked her books, I hope you’ll share in the comments below. I have no doubt that Snow Flower and the Fan will be a tasty book-dessert. ♥
Pearl Five
Never underestimate the power you have to take your life in a new direction.” — Germany Kent ♥
We had some excitement over the weekend with my young adult son, 22, and the family car. Nobody got hurt and that’s what matters most.
And again, if you’ve enjoyed this post I hope you’ll share it with others!
♥, Wendy
You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.
Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!!
I am not an expert, doctor, surgeon, nurse, dietician, or nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
