Gorgeous dress and photo by Art4Apparel

Pearl One

Are you okay with being different? I sure wasn’t. We moved enough when I was young, and I was terrible at being the new girl in class. Breaking into cliques wasn’t my forte, so I’ve found myself with a lifelong feeling of wanting to blend in.

But the way I see it, we’re the first generation of women over 50 who are taking our food-porn culture by the scruff and telling it, “You’ve done enough damage, we’re taking back our health one smart, ingrained habit at a time.”

Thing is, you have to make peace with being different.

• Different is telling an eating-buddy that you can’t meet her anymore at the cute bakery because you know you’ll overeat the “muffins” (basically cupcakes minus the frosting) in the glass case.

• Different is putting your foot down when someone tries to schedule an activity during the day, time you’ve set aside for your Pilates class.

• Different is asking the server “too many” questions about the ingredients in food at the restaurant and getting the side-eye from your partner.

I’ll say it again: we are the first generation of over 50s who can – and are – taking ownership of our health and our bodies. We determine our weight-fate, not Ben & Jerry’s.

And this requires swimming against the tide.

We can learn to navigate our culture’s gazillion calories, but it’s very unfamiliar territory. It requires entirely new ways of interacting with food, new ways of eating with friends and family, and new habits to establish.

There’s nothing special about me. If I can do this, you can too. ♥

Pearl Two

Do you take notes on your experience as you lose?

I’m not suggesting this lightly. I’m serious. This technique is awesome. Just a paragraph, three or four times a week will do it.

See a person in your mind’s eye as you write and tell her or him how losing after 50 can be done:

• What has been the most helpful to you as you lose: The kids being away at college so there’s less junk food in the kitchen? Your husband behind you one hundred percent because he wants to create a healthier lifestyle for you both too? That kind of thing.
• What structured eating plan are you using? Why do you like it?
• How much money are you saving by not buying junk- and fast-food?
• What has been the hardest part of losing (give several examples)?
• What scares you about losing after 50? Am I wasting my time? Will I be disappointed again?
• How are you navigating the naysayers?
• What have you substituted for desserts in the evenings?
• How do you rid your kitchen, car or cubicle of “trigger” food?
• What progress have you made that you’re most proud of?

As you lose and change your thinking around food in our culture, take notes. One day, someone you love will blurt, “You’ve lost so much weight. I can’t have surgery until I lose 30.  Please tell me how you’re doing this!”

And you’ll respond, “Give me a second while I print out my notes.” ♥

Pearl Three

I wouldn’t leave the house without my purse and phone, and I never leave the house without food either.

If I’m planning to be out for a while I bring my cold bag with an ice pack and fill it with half an apple, a baggie of petite carrots, a baggie of chopped, cooked broccoli that I eat cold, and a cup of Chobani yogurt.

But in an emergency I’ll break the glass and eat half of the Clif Bar that I always keep stashed in my purse. Yes, Clif Bars are big on sugar, but I only eat half which holds me for a good hour or so. If you don’t like Clif Bars, find something that won’t spoil and always keep it handy.

These days I’m good at navigating the food scene, but back when I was losing being very hangry (yes, I said hangry) meant all bets were off.

It’s a vital tool: keep yourself moderately full throughout your day. ♥

Pearl Four

From the self-sabotage department: where great ideas go to die.  

What I heard this week: this is taking too long!!

My push-back voice: I recently read that truly amazing “overnight successes” took five years of solid 24-karat work.

Then I hear: But I’m so tired. Ice cream would really make it better.

My push-back: Go to sleep, you can have ice cream in the morning. (Happily I never want ice cream in the morning.) ♥

Pearl Five

“Would you like me to give you a formula for success? It’s quite simple, really: Double your rate of failure. You are thinking of failure as the enemy of success. But it isn’t at all. You can be discouraged by failure or you can learn from it, so go ahead and make mistakes. Make all you can. Because remember that’s where you will find success.” — Thomas J. Watson ♥

What does your self-sabotage voice say to you? Please share in the comments below. 🙂

Happy middle of October!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. ♥

Cupcake-topper witch legs and photo are from SillyLittleSquirrels.

Happy Friday Everyone!

Pearl One

Waiting for my husband in Costco’s food court, I was being nosy checking out each cart as they rolled by.

At first, I was thinking, yum! Wish I was going home with that family. But then a cart went by with a lot of “clean” eating staples like eggs, leafy greens, apples and apples.

That cart got me thinking. We can use Costco in a way that doesn’t support our smart eating path or we can use Costco as yet another tool in our collection to support us in losing after 50.

This is how I use any food store, but I’ll specifically talk Costco here. Before going in, I eat something super filling. Shopping hungry is a dangerous game. Here’s what I typically do at Costco:

• I pretend like the candy and cookie/cake sections simply don’t exist. I never go near them.
• In their freezing cold room I get their bagged kale, baby carrots, and spinach (that I add to my green smoothie).
• In the right seasons I get a lot of fruit. The red grapes are especially good.
• I don’t buy eggs at Costco, but I’ve read that they’re a great deal.
• I often throw coffee and their tasty peanut butter into my cart.
• In the cold case in the middle of the store I buy a bag of frozen blueberries, a bag of frozen strawberries, and a bag of frozen veggies for stir-fry.
• I get their single-serving hummus cups. They come in 24 cute little cups that help me not overeat one of my favorite foods. My son loves them too.
• I haven’t tasted these yet, but I hear they’re good: Garden Lites Spinach & Egg White Frittatas.

In a regular grocery store, I do about the same. I stay out of the middle of the store that’s home to the cookie, chip, cracker and candy aisles.

I’ve always heard that it’s smart to shop around the perimeter of the store and that the overly processed junk food is in the center.

The one thing I do grab which isn’t probably the healthiest is Lean Cuisine cheese pizza but yum.

How my Mom Drew a Red Line for my Dad.

In 1976 when we moved from Reno to a house outside of San Francisco, my mom told my dad, “If you want to smoke, you have to do it outside. No smoking in this house.” The world was just catching on to how dangerous second-hand smoke is to our bodies.

Here we are 45 years later and we haven’t quite made the same leap that excess weight leads to serious health problems too.

If you’re shopping for another adult, take a page from my mom: have a long talk with your adult and stress that you’re shopping for fruits, veggies and the like from now on. Long ago, I told my scarfer-husband that if he wanted junk food, he’d have to shop and buy it for himself (and then hide it from me).

So far, so good.

The Real Takeaway.

Are you a good or a bad witch is a tongue-in-cheek way of saying, are you using your shopping trips to support your smart eating lifestyle? Or do you toss in “escape” food that you’ll inevitably overeat?

When we’re losing after 50, finding escapes that don’t involve calories is one of the secret sauces for success (good TV, great book, awesome music, a sweet animal are all zero-fat and zero-calories).

I encourage you to take a hard look at how you use your food stores. Write about food shopping in your journal and answer these questions:

• What do I do that’s really smart when food shopping. . .
• What could I improve . . .
• My obvious problems with smart-shopping are. . .
• A new habit I can work on adopting for smarter shopping is. . .
• A better way of shopping would be. . .

Losing after 50 is brutal enough, have your own back by embedding brainy shopping habits into your life. ♥

Pearl Two

Brides do it. People in boot camp do it. And parents of babies definitely do it.

It’s called immersion.

Often readers tell me that they “blew” their eating plan because family visited for a long weekend. Or they were on vacation. Or they had to drop their husband at the airport at 0-dark-thirty. There really are decent, perfectly understandable reasons for overeating.

And none of them matter when it comes to our smart eating path.

Immersion happens when we absolutely marinate ourselves in the world of smart eating after 50.

If you continue to attempt losing after 50 halfheartedly, you won’t eventually adopt the necessary habit changes for a successful loss and an even better maintenance.

When I lost my weight, I immersed myself in the world of healthy eating. I stocked the fridge with healthy food that I really like. I didn’t eat in restaurants much. I always had a healthy snack in my purse, a cold bag with food in the car, and plenty of healthy food in the fridge that I could quickly grab and eat.

I immersed myself.

My priorities were: my kids, my husband, our animals and my smart eating path. Nothing else got in the way. Or, I should say, I didn’t let anything else get in the way.

When you’re immersed in a world of smart eating, you can’t “blow” your eating plan. Really. When I overeat junk food I just think: huh, that wasn’t such a great idea. And then I go right back to my smart eating path.

Successful people do not ditch their plan because of a mere donut-frenzy. ♥

Pearl Three

My self-sabotage moments.

It’s too hard. It’s not worth it. It’s driving me crazy. Negative thoughts appear to be just a normal part of being human. And yet some people succeed outside of their wildest dreams. We’re stunned at their success, we wonder how did they pull it off?

My take? Those “lucky” few are able to turn down the volume on their self-sabotaging thoughts and get on with bringing something amazing to life. See Jeff Bezos, JK Rowling, even the Kardashian outfit.

Who would think that selling books online would lead to Amazon? That one book rejected by twelve publishers would become the Harry Potter franchise? Or that a sex tape — of all things — would create multiple gazillionaires in one family?

Turning down the volume on our self-sabotaging thoughts takes us towards our own wildest dreams. ♥

Pearl Four

Broccoli. It’s considered one of the superfoods and I’d always been taught to steam it. Which made it kind of soft and not tasty.

But I heard about searing cut-up broccoli in a pan with a teaspoon of olive oil and a bit of salt and pepper. And omg, much, much tastier. Crunchier too.

My new system is to eat a cup of broccoli every day. On busy days I’ll pack the seared broccoli into a baggie and add it to my cold bag that I eat from while doing errands. I eat a lot of veggies waiting at the stop light. (For safety, be careful to eat small bites and chew really well.) ♥

Pearl Five

“What makes your heart smile? Yeah. Do more of that.” – Anonymous

The holiday season is near and personal me-time tends to disappear from the to-do list. Fight the full plate. Establish routines now that will support you when the world goes a little crazy in November and December. 🙂

My heart smiles for animals, good books, a clean car, a beautiful living room, kitchen, bedroom and so on.

What three make your heart smile? ♥

I hope you’re loving this gorgeous fall we’re having!!

♥, Wendy

p.s. Are you from TWTM? Thank you for visiting!! I highly recommend reading the Aunt Bea post (you’ll find her to the right on this page under my short bio.). My posts don’t make a ton of sense if you haven’t first read Aunt Bea.

Some links may be affiliate links and as an Amazon Associate, I may earn from qualifying purchases. Of course you incur no additional cost.

Pearl # 1

You and I evolved to be part of a pack. We’re not meant to be loners, and those of us who are, aren’t doing well.

With that in mind, how are we supposed to embed smart eating habits into our lives when the pack eats a gazillion calories a day?

Great question.

If someone sees that you plan your meals in advance, or watches as you order a small dinner, members of the pack might say, “Oh, you’re on one of your diets” or that it’s “unhealthy to make such a big deal about food.”

But when you’re living from an internal locus, it doesn’t bother you because you alone make the decision about what and much and at what time you eat.

Take last week. It was late afternoon and I was “eating before I eat.” My husband and son – who’ve both lived with me for awhile now — ganged up and said, “We’re having dinner in 45 minutes, can’t you wait?”

I said, “If I show up at the dinner table super hungry, I’ll overeat.” Duh.

You’re the Boss of You.

For success on this trek of losing after 50, it’s necessary that you get comfortable standing up for yourself when everyone has an opinion on how and what you eat. When they make comments, say thanks for caring and change the subject. I’ve also used, “losing weight has made my back feel so much better.” (Which is true.)

One more example, say you’re driving home from a family outing, and — out of the blue — everyone wants ice cream. You think, that does sound good and pull into Brusters.

But here’s the thing: you hadn’t been thinking about ice cream at all. You’d been thinking about something else entirely. Because the family had ice cream on the brain, you end up eating ice cream with them.

Feeling like we’re out of the pack triggers one thing; our survival cave-woman brain. The best way to get back into the pack? Pizza and beer with friends on Friday!

It takes time and patience to build the confidence-muscle when you’re establishing new eating habits. Your confidence-muscle is likely a baby now, but gets stronger the more you use it. One day the confidence-muscle will have your back when you tell a friend at Starbucks, “thank you but I don’t want a chocolate cookie Frappuccino. Just coffee with almond milk which will go perfectly with my purse-snack.”

Eventually the food police among us will become bored with your new-normal and will start bugging someone else, or get back to their own lives. ♥

Pearl #2

Is food fuel or fun for you? Back in the day, food was one hundred percent fun for me. To be fair it was probably more like 85 percent. But then I lost the weight and gained solid habits along the way.

Today fifteen years into maintenance, I’ve flipped those percentages. Now I eat for fuel (fruits, veggies, brown rice etc.) ninety percent of the time and keep it to about ten percent “fun food.”

In our culture there are too many reasons to eat poorly: he graduated, she had a baby, he found a job, she got into her college of choice. Then there’s the holidays, anniversaries and so on.

If we’re being honest with ourselves we can always come up with a reason to eat fun food. These days I can easily tell when I’m eating for fuel, or having the occasional treat. ♥

Pearl 3

Last night I had a fleeting thought of, gee, more food before bed sure sounds good. (I wasn’t actually hungry-hungry, I was more sugar-hungry.)

But then I told myself: you’re having lunch with your son tomorrow. You can have something special then.

And with that, I went to bed perfectly happy.

Learning supportive self-talk is key to making smarter food choices. ♥

Pearl # 4

The Self-Sabotage Department. This is what I heard this week, you’re too old to (insert project).

Mainly, by simply calling out the saboteur and giving her a name, her power dissipates. Yet sometimes I think there might be a kernel of truth in her point, so in those cases I give more thought to what she’s bugging me about.

First, I sleep on it. The saboteur delivers her most damage right before bed. The next day, I write in my journal, and work to separate the critical saboteur voice from my “hey this needs your attention” voice.

The holidays are just a moment away and this is my time of year to overdo it: over-bake, over-buy presents, over-decorate and so forth. Traditionally the saboteur voice is like a slow drum beat in my head: it’s not enough, it’s not enough, it’s not enough.

So instead of indulging in my usual overdoing, this year I’ll journal about my tendency to go big, and work to separate the saboteur from an appropriate participation t in the holiday season. ♥

Pearl # 5

“Don’t practice until you get it right. Practice until you can’t get it wrong.” — Unknown ♥

A request: Will you share a food or recipe that you love that combines the healthy with the fun (from Pearl Two). Comment below and I’ll pull the ideas together for a future blog post.

Happy October 1 everybody!

♥, Wendy

P.s. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

Some links may be affiliate links and as an Amazon Associate, I may earn from qualifying purchases. Of course you incur no additional cost.

Emotional Eating.

For those of us who grew up in a challenging childhood, food was a whole new ballgame: we grew up using food as a substitute for what we weren’t getting at home.

For emotional eaters, food can be quite the chameleon. Just tell the box of grocery store donuts what you need, and — presto — the donuts will provide:

• Soothing after trauma (one horrific incident or many years of abuse)
• Excitement when we’re bored to tears.
• Distraction when real life is a pain in the tush.
• Anesthesia when we’re too despondent to move.
• A cloak when we want extra weight to help us disappear, i.e. blend in.

But let’s back up a moment.

Say a person’s childhood was particularly difficult. Many turned to liquor, cigarettes, drugs, over-dieting (anorexia) or over-dating.

We, on the other hand, preferred the comfort of chocolate cake.

Food’s Innocent, Right?

The thing is: food isn’t illegal and doesn’t fry our brain cells. Food doesn’t cause lung cancer (although beware: food’s a culprit in many diseases including cancer). Food returns our calls, it never leaves us wondering. Food doesn’t criticize or place demands on us. In short, food is a dear friend.

But here’s where the problem lies: the very substance we used to navigate a difficult childhood, is the exact thing that’s causing us major trouble as an adult.

Yes, food was immense comfort to us when we were young, but today the crutch is no longer needed yet we still clamp onto food like Linus with his blankie.

Our One-Time Friend Goes Rogue.

Today, rather than diving deep into food and childhood trauma, we’ll look at how to slowly shake off the habit of using food to soothe.

(That said, food will never allow us to transform bad habits to good ones unless the trauma is addressed. You’ll only get irritated with yourself for being “unsuccessful again.” Which isn’t what’s happening at all. What’s happening is that trauma needs to be acknowledged and treated in a safe, caring environment. Only you know if it’s time to get one-on-one support from a skilled therapist.)

For those who feel ready to change old overeating habits to good habits, let’s do this.

Journaling Gems.

I will never stop talking about how valuable writing (or typing) is for our mental health. I don’t believe in magic, but something incredibly important happens when we write. I’ve written stuff and thought, “what the heck? where did that come from?!”

In your journal write with abandon to:

• What food meant to me and how I used it when I was under twelve (give at least three answers):
• What food meant to me when I was a teen:
• Same question: when I was in my 20’s:
• In my 30’s:
• 40’s:
• What food means to me today:
• What are three small steps I can make today and this entire week to engage with food in a new healthier way:
• Today I will:
• This week I will:
• On a scale of one to ten (one being not at all, ten being totally onboard) how committed am I to making these three small steps come to life?
• If my score is low, how can I raise it?
• Deep down I know that I’m not terribly committed because:
• What positive thought can I use to remind myself that this time my efforts will produce great results?

Re-visit the three small steps every morning this week and then strategize (on paper) how you’ll incorporate the strategies into your life.

In the end, food may have ushered us successfully through childhood, but it’s now causing trouble. Thank food for the comfort it brought. And now, turn the page to a new chapter in your life that puts food into it’s proper place (sometimes fun; mostly fuel). ♥

You are the loveliest group! I can’t say enough about how wonderful you guys are. It also appears that many of us are dog- and cat-people.

And please keep sending questions or concerns, it helps me better understand where my focus should be.

Have a wonderful week,

♥, Wendy

P.s. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

Some links may be affiliate links and as an Amazon Associate, I may earn from qualifying purchases. Of course you incur no additional cost.

I’ve written about “Why Pretty Matters” for ourselves in this post here.

But today we’re talking why pretty matters in our surroundings.

When we’re over 50 and attempting to lose weight, we haven’t chosen a gentle path. Let’s be truthful with our own selves and remember: when losing after 50, we’re trekking the Matterhorn.

There’s no other group who has such a hard time losing and maintaining than women over 50. Being upfront with ourselves can bring a deep sigh of relief as in, phew, it’s not just my imagination, it really is hard to lose after 50.

Therefore every tweak we make to our own minds – i.e. habits — gives us crucial tools to stay confidently on our path of smart eating.

Pretty Backdrops to our Lives.

Embrace these tools that I’m about to detail. Remember what we’re shooting for: more support for ourselves as we lose after 50.

Beauty Tool One.

Two Christmases ago, I bought a gorgeous pink mug for myself and three friends. My hope was that we’d think of each other when drinking morning coffee.

That said, what do you eat on? Do you get a burst of happiness at using certain plates, cutlery and mugs? Dining on beauty is a hugely important tool.

If you don’t get a little thrill from a certain plate or mug, buy something special for just you. Let the family know: these are mine. If you’re on a tight budget, you’ll find gorgeous tableware for a song at a thrift store.

Beauty Tool Two.

Your bedroom. When you walk into your room does your heart beat, ooh, pretty? Or is it more like, this carpet needs cleaning.

Make your bed beautiful and/or cozy. And if you need to get your carpet cleaned: get your carpet cleaned.

Last winter I dove deep into cozy and bought an electric blanket and extra pillows for my bed, I also spread my grandmother’s knitted blanket on top. My bed might not make the pages of House Beautiful, but it screams comfort and happiness to me.

A friend bought beautiful new sheets for her bed. Smart.

Uplevel your bedroom, it’s an investment that pays off daily.

Beauty Tool Three.

These day a lot of us work from home. What is your desk situation? Is it pretty? Does it make you want to sit down and get to work?

My desk is in the living room. I know that sounds crazy, but if I were upstairs working in a bedroom office I’d never see my teens. They’re barely around as it is.

Here’s what I’ve done with my desk: I clean and tidy it daily and I put a vase of twinkle lights on as décor in place of a plant or flowers (that the cat would knock off for fun). My desk is also at the window that showcases the wild birds eating the seed I put out every morning.

Beauty Tool Four.

Your car. Is it clean? If not, join me in taking your car to get a bath every other month. At first the cost freaked me out, but in just one visit I understood the importance to my mental health. Lol. In alternate months, I clean it myself. And I de-trash it daily.

Beauty Tool Five.

Holiday décor. Might sound obvious, but every time I see something beautiful for the season like a pretty pumpkin, a Thanksgiving mantle, a lighted deer I get a jolt of happiness.

Beauty Tool Six.

Sounds kind of silly, but I have a pink ipod. I use it daily to listen to podcasts and I figured why not get a pink one? I’m not suggesting you buy expensive tech. But I am saying that beautifying the items you most use isn’t silly it’s just one more way to layer pretty into our lives.

The Real Agenda Behind Beautiful Surroundings.

Making your life beautiful isn’t frivolous. It’s required. When you choose gorgeous plates and mugs, when you create a cozy bed, when you make your world beautiful: you’re signalling to yourself in no uncertain that you are important and matter. (And sadly, the opposite teaches the opposite.)

Remember, we can do hard things. Beautifying our lives gives us a beautiful view as we trek losing after 50.

If you like this piece, it would be awesome if you’d share it with someone you love.

And if you’re on Instagram, I’d love a follow: @TheInspiredEater.

Have a wonderful week, everyone!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

Photo, gorgeous phone case, (& more bejeweled pieces) are by celdeconail.

Pearl # 1

Full disclosure: There is a wrinkle to losing after 50.

 Back when I was “well-insulated,” I never had dark circles under my eyes.

Ever.

My face was a blown up balloon: smooth, no wrinkles, and definitely no dark circles.

When I took off the final pounds, several stayed poofed on my face. Then menopause hit.

When that thrill ride was over, I emerged a raccoon.

I tried everything: concealers (Shape Tape and the popular Maybelline one) and a rainbow of color correctors. I even tried carefully dabbing zinc sunblock under my eyes (just to see what would happen). 

Nothing happened.

And therein lies the adage women have heard for ages, “You need to pick: your fanny? Or your face?” meaning if you lose too much weight your face deflates like a balloon.

When I first caught sight of my dark circles, I was not happy and decided to gain five pounds. Still nothing. I kept the five pounds on for six months to see if anything would improve.

Nothing improved.

My Takeaway

At 67, Oprah looks fantastic. Sure, she’s a a billionaire and so forth, but partly her looks are due to not over-losing in her 60s. Keeping some weight on keeps her face filled.

In retrospect, I likely needed to gain ten to fifteen pounds, and then let them hang around forever to really impact my dark circles. But jeans, nicer clothes, undies, everything I had were in a specific size and blah, blah, blah.

Don’t make my mistake.

As you slowly lose – giving your body generous amounts of time to adjust and stabilize along the way – ditch the idea of getting down to your college or pre-baby weight. Shoot for a happy middle between your fanny and your face.

Because not only can’t we eat like when we were young, turns out we can’t lose like we’re young either. ♥

Pearl # 2

You know, “calories in, calories out?” Well, I’m no scientist, doctor or nutritionist, but I think one day they’ll arrive at the idea that there’s something to the timing of calories rather than just the amount we take in.

I’m not talking about intermittent fasting. Or maybe I partially am. I’m talking about eating the “fun” calories for breakfast, having a moderate lunch, a small snack in the afternoon and a tiny plate at dinner. By 6:30 p.m. I’m done eating for the day. (If I eat breakfast at 8:30 a.m., a 14-hour intermittent fast isn’t bad.

I started this eating plan in January and have been surprised at how chill it’s made me re: healthy eating. I  haven’t been struggling with staying within my preferred one to three pound range.

I wrote more about success with this type of eating here and here. ♥

Pearl # 3

Welcome to my mind on self-sabotage where every incredibly awesome idea comes to die.

This week I had self-sabotage thoughts on a constant-loop. I wish that we could surgically remove these Eeyore thoughts. This is what I heard this week:

•  “All your effort won’t do much and you’ll feel like an idiot again.”
• “You’re spending too much time on this. You’re stealing from your family!”
• “Your life is good, you’re nuts not to kick back with Netflix and chill.”

Here’s what I do with these thoughts. If they happen after 6 p.m. I remind myself not to listen to them at all. I pretend they aren’t there and grab a good book to quiet them down. If they happen during the day, I listen closely. Maybe they have a point. I give their ideas serious thought, and then implement fifty percent of what they’re pushing for. Our ultimate plan: identify self-sabotaging thoughts as the life ruining wet blankets that they are. ♥

Pearl # 4

Best Hack in the World Alert! I was late to the cell phone party, so you might already know about this hack.

I’ve never been a fitness enthusiast. The best I’ve ever done is almost three years of weekly yoga/Pilates classes, but my instructor moved. (Lamo reason for not finding new classes, I know.)

Motivating myself to use my indoor recumbent bike has been a massive fail.

But here’s what I figured out: I put the Netflix app on my phone and told myself that I can only watch a show when I’m pedaling the bike. I know!! Brilliant, right?!

I went from thirty to fifty minutes on the bike. I can’t wait for my endurance to build so that I can binge-watch. ♥

Pearl # 5

If you’ve gotten an idea from this post to use in your own life, awesome!! Let me know what you liked, or what you’d like more of for October posts. The holidays are galloping our way, I’m betting you have questions re: maintaining or losing after 50 during the holidays.

And trust me, it’s not your imagination. Health is hard.

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime. 🙂

One morning long ago, my husband practically pranced into the house with a pink box, opened the lid and asked, “Want a donut?”

At the time, I’d lost the remaining pounds, but was still on Bambi-legs adjusting to my new normal: maintenance.

“No. None for me, but thanks.”

He replied kindly, “Oh, live a little!”

He wasn’t food-pushing. It was more seeming pleased that I was “all-in” on smart eating and not back to my usual yo-yo plan.

Plus, of course, he wanted the box to himself.

No, But Seriously.

Saying no thanks. Why is it so hard?

Here’s my thought. Saying no to food is brutally difficult when we haven’t yet shifted from an external locus of control to an internal locus. (Locus is just a note away from the word “focus.” Locus in therapist-speak means “the place we come from.”)

People with an external locus allow their eating-lives to be determined by events, people and any luck that happens their way. For example:

• She walked in with stacks of pizzas for the meeting that turned into a total snooze. I couldn’t resist.

• Who isn’t stuffed after Thanksgiving ? Come on! It’s tradition!

• The Christmas holidays are my greatest weakness. Everyone goes crazy with food and drink! How can you not?

Those of us with an external locus explain results by saying that something outside of our control happened to us like a holiday, a season, a person or people, an unusual event like a wedding and so on.

You can easily see it in children. Kids are all about the external locus like when they say, “He made me do it!” (Even if parents don’t have a name for it, they work diligently to teach their little people how to come from an internal locus.)

You get the idea.

But great news: we’re not born with a tendency to be one or the other. We decide for ourselves whether to live from an external or internal place.

Saying No 101.

Most of us begin with an overcooked, limp noodle of a no, but with perseverance we can strengthen it into becoming a part of who we are as people. Yes, our land is blanketed in food-porn, but our culture is easier to navigate when we keep our “no-tool” with us at all times.

Think of it this way: the more you use your “no-tool”, the closer you are to becoming a person who lives from an internal locus. Meaning you get the say over what weight you feel best at; not Kroger, not your favorite Mexican, and definitely not Dunkin’ Donuts.

When I Say No.

I say no a lot. I say no when we’re on vacation (cruise ships are calorie ships), on holidays, eating out, and with family and friends. Even myself (as in: no, you cannot have the leftover Halloween candy: get it out of the house etc.).

The Habit of No.

Begin saying no every single day for forever. You want it to become second-nature. I know this might sound funny, but keep a sentence-a-day journal chronicling when you say no, like this:

9-12-21 – Your sister invites you out for Mexican. You say, “no, not tonight.”

9-13-21 – Your mom is always telling you to lighten up just before she offers you a chocolate croissant and you reply, “No, but thank you.”

9-14 –21 – Your husband makes pancakes for the kids every Saturday and asks if you’d like some. “No, I’m good. None for me.”

Watch as your no-muscle gets stronger and stronger every week, every month, every year. And eventually the people in your orbit will stop asking. (Which I really love.)

Is shifting to an internal locus easy? Sadly, nothing awesome is easy on this planet, but this is the moment when we remind ourselves that we can do hard things.

I’d love to hear your “no” stories. Feel free to share in the comments below. ♥

I mentioned in an earlier post that I love early fall because I take my shepherd to three end-of-summer doggie swim events. Below (under the purple text) is a picture of one very happy dog and his mom. Look in your area for these popular doggie swims too.

Remember you and I are forever beautiful works in progress.

I try to remember this thought throughout my day. Let’s remember it together.

♥, Wendy

P.S. Have you read Buh-Bye Aunt Bea Bod: 13 Tools to Lose Weight & Maintain a Forever Loss?

I packed Aunt Bea with every essential method I used to lose fifty-five and still use today.

Remember getting your driver’s license? How learning to drive wasn’t a “one and done” thing? Same with Aunt Bea. The Aunt Bea post is your ride to embedding Smart Eating habits into your life, habits that will have your back forever.

You can find Aunt Bea on this screen to your right. Just add your email and click the pink button. You’ll be sent an Aunt Bea email. If you don’t see an email within thirty minutes, check your spam. And always feel free to contact me: Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com.

Or better yet, click Begin Here. ♥♥♥ Print Aunt Bea, and tape her inside a kitchen cupboard, on your car’s dash, under your pillow, and so forth.

Apply to life as needed.

Meeko, 10, is the supermodel for The Chic Dog Boutique ‘s stunning doggie jewelry collection.

I’ve noticed that so many of us love animals.

But I promise. This is not a “walk your dog for better health” post.

Here we go.

Pearl # 1

I run my German shepherd daily to keep his ten-year-old self in shape, and it occurred to me that what you and I do for our darling fur-people in their senior years is an interesting tutorial for our own lives.

Some examples:

• I make sure River moves daily. Instead of running him for a full hour like I once did, I break his walks into two: one in the morning and another in the evening. Translation for humans: Incorporating fitness into several parts of our day might be more do-able than one great burst of a workout.
• I won’t let River become overweight. He’s fairly sedentary now, so keeping calories light is vital. Today snacks are banana, carrots, cut up apple, cucumber and the like. Translation: I know, you know, but it bears repeating that you and I need fewer calories these days too.
• I keep it fun for River. For example I put him on a sit/stay and hide his breakfast or dinner bowl somewhere on the first floor of our house. I then yell, “find!” And he tears through the rooms looking for his food. He usually finds it quickly, but I’ve stumped him a couple of times. In other words, I do all I can to stave off his boredom. Translation: Losing after 50 is no walk in the park. Snoozy-food causes big trouble. Keep healthy food that excites you on hand 24/7.
• I brush – actually, Furminate – River daily. I want him to feel pampered and loved. Translation: Make the extra effort to take care of yourself. That might mean asking your partner for a foot rub or it might mean a professional massage. Be creative and come up with ways to Furminate yourself. Daily.
• At ten, River naps more. Translation: don’t fight a siesta. If you need to close your eyes, close your eyes. ♥

Pearl # 2

Here’s the thing, we think terrible, awful, no-good unhelpful thoughts about ourselves on the regular. Dare I say it: we can be very hard on us. Check out this tool that will keep your brilliance front-and-center.

What is one of the proudest experiences of your life?

I’m talking about a successful experience that will always leave you thinking, I can’t believe it, but I did it. I actually did it. I’m talking about the kind of success that’ll melt your heart even when you’re 98.

For me, that experience is homeschooling my two. I will forever be astounded at what the four of us – my husband and the “boys” – accomplished.

Okay. Now watch how I embed the memory into my daily life.

First, in my mind, I choose an object.

For myself, I choose the first Little House book by Laura Ingalls Wilder. I then direct myself to infuse the Little House book with the elation and pride I will always carry in my heart about homeschooling.

I then ask myself to make the Little House book huge like a mountain in my mind. I do.

Then to make it tiny like a diamond ring. Again, I do.

Finally I make the book a regular size, and coach myself to recall this image daily. The idea is that every time I think of the book, I’ll be immediately flooded with wondrous pride at homeschooling my two from snickerdoodles into incredible young men.

Now it’s your turn. Think of a time when you blew your own mind. Embed that fabulous experience into one object. Objects can be an image of a tall pine, a 4^th of July firework’s finale, even a green sea turtle you once saw in Hawaii.

Now mentally place your “overflowing pride” memory into, say, the sea turtle. In your mind make the turtle huge, then small and finally medium. (You’re showing yourself that you have control over your turtle-thought.)

This tool is a way to quickly bridge into remembering your strengths.

Sixty-six days of sea turtle, here we come. ♥

Pearl # 3

Last week I said that I’d share the self-sabotaging thoughts that hammer me daily (ex: this is too hard, you can’t do this, this is for others and so forth).

These notes are from last week.

This week I didn’t notice as many self-sabotage thoughts as self sabotage behavior. And yet, I know that a thought always comes before a behavior.

For example, I love to work in a spruced-up, clean environment. Do I start the day with a clean desk and tidy as I go through the day? Heck no.

Turns out my self sabotage behaviors were so ingrained that they’d become terrible habits that needed to be rooted out and replaced with good habits.

So I started to dig into my self sabotage thoughts that lead to my cluttery desk: I don’t have time to clean it, I have a doctor’s appointment. Not now, I have to go to sleep. This afternoon I’ll clean it. I’ll clean it in the morning. Tomorrow for sure I’ll clean it.

Challenge: Don’t allow self sabotaging thoughts to run amok in your mind. Dig deep and replace those thoughts and behaviors with habits that will have your back forever. (Here I go, 66-days to embed my new clean-desk behavior. Today is Day 1, I’ll let you know how the next 59 go.) ♥

Pearl # 4

Tim Ferriss keeps only four books on his desk at all times. This is one of the four. The Magic of Thinking Big by David Schwartz.

The publish date is vintage – 1959 – but the ideas packed within are eternal. Schwartz writes about how to be a self-starter, how to stay the path, and most of all how to create a bigger life than you’d ever imagined possible.

I don’t know where Mr. Schwartz learned all of this good stuff, but he nailed it. Run, don’t walk.

I can’t wait to hear what you think about The Magic of Thinking Big. ♥

Pearl # 5

So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then, when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.” ♥

Christopher Reeves

We’re charting new territory, learning to eat well within a food-gone-wild culture. There will be obstacles, but that’s okay because we’re learning: we can do hard things.

Remember you and I are forever beautiful works in progress.

I try to remember this thought throughout my day. Let’s remember it together.

♥, Wendy

P.S. Have you read Buh-Bye Aunt Bea Bod: 13 Tools to Lose Weight & Maintain a Forever Loss?

I packed Aunt Bea with every essential method I used to lose fifty-five and still use today.

Remember getting your driver’s license? How learning to drive wasn’t a “one and done” thing? Same with Aunt Bea. The Aunt Bea post is your ride to embedding Smart Eating habits into your life, habits that will have your back forever.

You can find Aunt Bea on this screen to your right. Just add your email and click the pink button. You’ll be sent an Aunt Bea email. If you don’t see an email within thirty minutes, check your spam. And always feel free to contact me: Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com.

Or better yet, click Begin Here. ♥♥♥ Print Aunt Bea, and tape her inside a kitchen cupboard, on your car’s dash, under your pillow, and so forth.

Apply to life as needed. 🙃