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In Endless Summers

The Superpower of Massive Action, new Costco Find & A Spectacular Book-Dessert

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Hi Thrivers,

I swear, get to a certain age and you spend half your life in the doctor’s office. 🙂 ♥

Pearl One is from an earlier post. I believe so strongly in this method of bringing something great into our lives.

Pearl One

“We are bleeding money.”

Over the last four years my husband and I had been — 24/7 — diapering, feeding and caring for twin infants slash toddlers. Once my boys were semi-functional, I was raring to take family-trips to Lake Tahoe, the beach, various Children’s Museums and so forth.

In short, I wanted our family to travel.

“We can afford to drive around the corner,” my husband said. “Call me when you arrive.”

Thanks to the ’08 crash, the planet was reeling. Money problems everywhere, houses not selling, belts tightening.

Even that said, Oh, the Places I Wanted to Go.

After my husband announced, “not a chance”, I didn’t argue or suggest ways we could “rob Peter to pay Paul,” or call my best friend crying about the dumb choice I’d made in a husband.

I said to myself only, “My. Kids. Will. Travel.” I felt those words into my very marrow. I had no idea how we’d find the bucks for travel; I only knew that – contrary to all of the evidence around me – we were going places.

And we did.

Here’s how it went down.

After a handful of false starts, I asked an editor-friend who produced a local parenting magazine if she’d be interested in a travel column.

She jumped at the idea and — with that email to Barb — I’d created a small job for myself. My family and I traveled and after each trip, I’d write about our experiences for Barbara’s mag. (We had a blast and, I was getting paid — not a ton — but still.)

Was it a fluke?

Back then, I didn’t have the vocab to talk about why my travel-determination worked, but I knew something – outside of the ordinary – had taken place and I wanted to figure out what it was, so that I could replicate my results.
Here’s what I learned.

Turns out, those in the coaching world – like Tony Robbins — call what I stumbled upon “massive action.” Tony Robbins didn’t invent massive action any more than
Ben Franklin invented electricity, but they both noticed a reality and pointed it out to the world.

To me, massive action is feeling — into the very fiber of my being — that something I want will happen (come hell or high water).

Before I knew the term “massive action,” I called it “leaving no stone unturned.” Quick example: Long before I had kids, I had to pass a licensing exam and I used “no stone unturned” to study for the big, scary test. I did everything conceivable to pass, and I figured, if I didn’t pass then it must be due to something outside of my control.

But I passed. (And trust me, every stone was turned.)

How Massive Action Works

Massive action is happening when you throw everything you can possibly think of at a project or a problem until the door swings open.
It’s when you’re at your most determined.

When you go massive action on something that matters deeply to you, it’s almost as if the Universe says, “Oh, brother. This mom in California will not stop knocking at the door. Just give her travel so we can get onto other things.”

Writing is Your Portal

To know what’s going on in your heart and head, write. Writing is free therapy and is always there for you. Free-write in the mornings. Free-write like nobody is going to read it (because they won’t). Free-write to discover what makes you tick.

Every morning, ask yourself these questions and see what your super sophisticated brain spills forth:

‱ What does future-me in six months most want?
‱ What are five things that matter most to me in life?
‱ If I had a life mission, what would it be? (Give three life mission answers.)
‱ What is something that matters to me that the rest of our culture tends to overlook?

Consciously Using Massive Action

Once I heard the term “massive action,” I was far more successful in wielding its power. Through the last ten or so years, here’s how I’ve added to my life using massive action:

My sister and I – who, at one-time, couldn’t talk on the phone for twenty-minutes without both of flying off the handle – are currently going on four years of a loving, argument-free relationship.

I added a recumbent trike to my life that was “too pricey to afford,” but thanks to massive action, I bought a demo model that wiped $1500 off the price tag (plus it came with a bunch of upgrades and I didn’t pay shipping).

I massive actioned us into a gorgeous home in Atlanta just eight-minutes from my husband’s job (a commute practically unheard of in Atlanta).

Your challenge:

Think massive action is too woo-woo for your life and probably doesn’t work anyway? Okay, then try this challenge: choose one thing you’d like to have in your life that’s just a tad out of reach. (Let’s start slow.)

Then apply massive action to your project:

One

Begin by writing about your project. What will you feel when you’ve brought home the new item/lifestyle? (Write about ten feelings you’ll experience when you lose twenty pounds, slide that new kayak into the river, or hand over $1,000 to your favorite charity.)

Two

Free-write ten common sense actions you can take to attain your item/lifestyle.

Three

Now free-write ten insane, totally wild actions you can take to attain your goal. (As in, “I could steal a kayak, I could build my own” and so forth. As Prince said, “Let’s go crazy.”)

Four

Now, take action from your list, all the while telling yourself that stopping is not an option. Just keep on keeping on:

If it takes longer than you’d assumed, keep going.

If it’s much harder than you’d imagined, also keep going. (Your mantra: we can do hard things.)

If the December holidays, your birthday, rain, snow, a hot summer, a bad cold etc creates more of an obstacle than you’d anticipated, keep going: no excuse to stop.

The main directive: don’t stop writing, experiencing your feelings, and engaging in action until that kayak is under your butt in the river.

That said, here’s one wrinkle in the massive action story:

Let’s say, I want to walk into my garage and find a gorgeous, fire-engine red Jeep waiting for me. But – and this is key – I don’t want the Jeep to the exclusion of my sons’ (pricey) lessons like theater, piano, and Krav Maga.

Or say I love the ocean and want to live near it, but uprooting my kids from Atlanta is a deal-killer. (The boys would be horrified to leave friends, infrastructure and so forth.)

And say I need a weekly bathroom cleaner. (Don’t we all?) But at $100 a week (or more), it’s a no-go currently because of the boys’ many lessons.

You see, I only go massive action on an item or lifestyle if I know — from my free-writing — that I won’t let a single thing stop me from achieving that change in my life. Sure, I could go all massive action and put a gorgeous red Jeep in my garage, but I know that other goals that also truly matter to me would go sideways.

Massive action can only happen if nothing will stand in our way of getting what we want like – in my case — family travel, or getting along with my sister, or buying a recumbent trike.

I massive action something that matters to me – as long as the item/lifestyle doesn’t threaten other aspects of my life that are also high priorities (like my family and animals). ♥

Pearl Two

I have a new Costco food I want to share with everyone. As you know, I’m a huge believer in the REP way of eating – breakfast like a king, lunch like a princess, and eat dinner like a pauper.

The last time I was in Costco, on a whim, I added their “organic acai bowls” to my cart (found in frozen near huge bag of frozen strawberries and blueberries).

For some reason I thought the acai bowls had a dessert element to them, but they don’t. They have more of a crunch, granola, blueberry vibe.

At first, I wasn’t impressed, but after eating all six bowls I now think, “these guys are tasty.”

They’re vegan, gluten free, and with the little packet of granola-like crunchy things you put on top of these bowls, the calorie count comes to just 180. Not bad, right?

Last week I wrote about trying to stick with only five-ingredient foods, but this bowl is way more than five.

I can’t emphasize enough that to stay on the Smart Eating Path, keeping your food fun and interesting is major-league important. Make at least one meal in your day something you really love. ♥

Pearl Three

June’s topic for the month: what cannot be an afterthought in our smart eating lives. Every week we’ll talk circumstances that require hard-core planning rather than “winging it.”

  • June 2 topic: We’re heading into vacation-season, do you have a plan about how and what you’ll eat on your trip?
  • June 9 topic: Do you have a plan for how you’ll handle the negative-food that “shows up” in your kitchen?
  • June 16 topic: Do you have a written plan for the moments when you’re furious or super sad? If your former “fix” to these emotions was food, have you given conscious thought to how you’ll manage the overflow of feelings without food around?

I should tell you that when I was losing the final of fifty-five pounds, I was furiously determined (is that a term?) about getting down to my preferred weight. At the time I was losing, I was still attending WW sessions every week. Just as I’d lost the last five pounds, we moved to VA and WW meetings came to an end.

Beyond a shadow of a doubt, I understood that my coping mechanism was food and that I had to figure out better ways of dealing with bad feelings.

My go-tos. Reading, rock music, shower or bath, doing things like coloring my hair or doing my nails, listening to an inspirational podcast; my list helped me get through rough times and overwhelming emotional moments. Definitely getting away from the TV and the kitchen were part of the success too.

My mind-shifts. It was a huge shift for me to write to myself from future-me. I wrote from that evening-me, tomorrow-me, autumn-me, five years from now-me and so forth. In my journal I told current-me how much I appreciated that she did a, b, c for me (like lock-in a fantastic habit, or do things over the summer that I loved).

I also was into the idea of micro-rewards. I’d talk to myself and say, “This evening is a tough one. If we stick to our eating plan and go to bed early, have a hot shower, and read a great book: we’ll get a pedicure tomorrow.” But here’s the thing: you must follow-through. Don’t tell yourself, “Do well tonight and I’m buying those pricey earrings you liked!” (And then the next day bail on the idea because the earring are just plain too expensive. You never want her to feel tricked.)

Reasonable rewards for the next day are like a two-hour block of reading time, getting the car cleaned, or even purchasing an inexpensive pool float.

Planning your hard times before they happen is like 80-percent of the job handled. ♥  

Pearl Four

The Girl with the Louding Voice by Abi DarĂ© is a coming-of-age novel by a powerhouse of a writer. Her daughters encouraged their mom to write her first book and omg is it good. DarĂ© has an MA in creative writing from Birkbeck, University of London along with other degrees. She’s a brain.

Her book reminds me a lot of the internist Khaled Hosseini who wrote the acclaimed novels: The Kite Runner (2003) and its follow-up A Thousand Splendid Suns (2007).

The Girl with the Louding Voice is about a poor girl growing up in Nigeria. How she learns and grows in a wealthy household is a testament to resilience and strength.

Daré’s book won The Bath Novel Award for unpublished manuscripts in 2018 and was selected as a finalist in 2018 for The Literary Consultancy Pen Factor competition.   Absolutely five-stars. ♥

Pearl Five

It is facile (something done easily without an understanding of the difficulty involved) to imply that smoking, alcoholism, overeating, or other ingrained patterns can be upended without real effort. Genuine change requires work and self-understanding of the cravings driving behaviors.”

— Charles Duhigg, The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business ♥

I love this quote so much because it flies directly in the face of our world’s diet-culture who love to yammer on about how losing and preserving weight “is easy.”

Total baloney sauce.

But, I will tell you, that while it’s not easy, it is learnable. It’s doable. It sounds trite to say, “if I can, you can.” I only wish you had known me from childhood to my mid-30s. You would have met someone who always had food on the brain and never fit into most (all?) of her clothes.

I’m headed to the pool this weekend (it’s something autumn-me asked for). I love the pool, I just don’t like the work involved like putting on a bathing suit, walking to the pool, putting on sunscreen, hoping I’ll find an umbrella and blah, blah, blah.

Have a sun-block weekend, everyone!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. ♥

Best Dessert-Books on the Planet

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In Endless Summers

Here’s Why the Eating “Experts” Differ on Best Way to Eat for Health

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If you’re tempted this weekend, just remind yourself you can have your treat in the morning with coffee. Still want 4th of July dessert? Think: pretty popsicles, macaroni at Trader Joe’s or Costco, and watermelon. And always keep your cold-tote full and by your side.

Hi Thrivers,

I’m spending the entire weekend taking my clutter to the local dog and cat thrift store for drop-off. It feels so good to get rid of stuff that I didn’t even know I had anymore. ♥

Pearl One

I get it. The many how-to-have-the-best-body types have their own ideas about what is smart eating and what’s not. It’s crazy-confusing when one “expert” encourages saving a dessert for the morning while the another is clearly in the all-sugar-is-bad camp.

I’ve been giving a lot of thought to the “dueling experts” idea after a Thriver sent an email saying that her favorite fitness guy espouses the no-sugar way of living. This man did an amazing job of taking his body from pudgy to ripped so I’m guessing that his readers are those who lift weights and want to eat well to optimize their workouts.

All good.

Here’s the thing:  This man is totally right. Zero sugar is the gold-standard for optimal health.

But he and I have two different approaches to losing and preserving a loss because we have two different end-games.

He’s teaching others how to live their best weight lifting-life that leaves no room for sugar.

Whereas I’m addressing the psychological reasons for overeating and binge-eating in women over fifty, a topic he probably doesn’t want to touch.

When you and I transfer our nighttime sugar raids to eating one dessert in the morning with our coffee, we’re slowly weaning ourselves off of sugar. (That said, if even a bite of chocolate triggers you into a week of overeating, clearly having a brownie at breakfast won’t work for you, for now.)

I’d like to get us to zero nighttime eating. Eating one dessert at night generally turns into more: a bowl of ice cream becomes two, one cupcake turns into three. And, let’s face it, a lot of us pile the ice cream and cupcakes together for the best dessert ever.

You see my point.

By scheduling the treat in the morning were doing the following:

1) We’re extinguishing the evening habit of having two, three or more desserts at night. We’re putting sugar into a time of day when few of us go overboard on a treat and eat too much. 

2) We’re helping ourselves “not  feel cheated” because “everyone” is having desserts after dinner.

3) Our bodies don’t grip onto calories the way they do at night. I know this is a controversial idea, but those in the field of science are starting to take note, and it sure works in my life..

Basically, I’m coming more from a let’s use mind-sets and strategies to keep our weight down after age fifty. And he’s coming from an “optimizing our food, for a better lifting body” viewpoint.

Here’s the upshot: the longer I told myself I could have my dessert in the morning, I’d find that I didn’t want sugar in the morning. I mean, sometimes yes, but for the most part I reach for cereal instead. ♥ 

Pearl Two


Trust me, if I allowed certain treats into my home, they wouldn’t be safe. My brain would say, “it’s only oatmeal. In cookie-form. Okay, with sugar. But – really — what’s the big deal? It’s just oatmeal?”

I’m about to rant. I’m afraid I’ll sound smug and pompous, but I’m not. I just think I look at food-porn differently than the average bear.

In the same week, I read two different people talk nonchalantly about food-porn: a blogger said, “I had a Sonic Blast and I refuse to feel guilty about it.” (A Sonic Blast is a milkshake with your choice of M&Ms, Snickers, Peanut Butter Cups or Butterfingers.)

Food-porn on steroids.

The man, a guy with an extreme obesity issue who writes about very much wanting to lose weight, said something similar and described how he wandered around a store while nursing a milkshake.

But the milkshakes aren’t my point. We all have our version of the milkshake and I’m certainly no different than you.

My point is the attitude both the blogger and writer shared. The blogger wrote that she “refused to feel guilty” and the guy’s essay was written in a very blase voice, he treated his junk-food like “it’s just one milk shake” type of thing.

Do I want them to beat themselves up? Of course not.

That’s a quick ride to nowheres-ville.

The part that bothers me is that they don’t yet get that our brains only need one milkshake to establish a habit. You might be thinking, “Well, they each had only one milkshake. Thing is, our cavewoman brain is a like three-year-old. Do something super fun one time and — as she sees it — a habit has been instilled.

No discussion. It’s done.

We don’t have to have six milk shakes to embed an awful habit that will be tough to correct.

It just takes one time.

So, when I’m eyeing the fancy cookies that The Scarfer keeps in his stash I ask myself this heavy-lifter of a question:

Is this thing I’m about to do or eat, add to my strong habits or take me down the overeating road?

This question reminds me that I don’t need to have three, four or five milkshakes to form a habit. ♥

I only need one. ♥

Pearl Three

June’s topic for the month: what cannot be an afterthought in our smart eating lives. Every week we’ll talk circumstances that require hard-core planning rather than “winging it.”

I love the term “sweet spot.” It’s a fun way to talk about something particularly wonderful like, “my sweet spot for reading a great book is at night, in my cozy bed.”

But what if we flip the script and talk about a “bitter spot” as in, “my bitter spot for choosing porn-food is definitely right after dinner.”

So much power and magic appear when we’ve taken planning seriously. In your journal, write about your bitter spots and how you’ll address them.

Take it one day at a time. And rewrite a new plan every single morning.

Writing a plan for your bitter spot March 1 and never looking at it again until June 1 is no way to deal with a bitter spot. Every single morning write a brand new plan detailing how you’ll bookend your bitter spot with smart activities. ♥  


Pearl Four

The readers in the book clubs I follow on Facebook rave about Lessons in Chemistry by Bonnie Garmus. Some even say it’s their most favorite book of the year. And these people read a lot.

But be forewarned: the cover of this book gives the assumption that it’s a rom-com or chick lit. It’s neither. It’s a thoughtful story filled with dry humor somewhat like The 100 Year OId Man Who Jumped Out of the Window and Disappeared.

Many call this book A+. I’m more in the A- camp. A great read, but my two favorites so far this year:

A Woman of No Importance the Untold Story of the American Spy Who Helped Win World War II by Sonia Purnell. This woman was such a success at her “work” that she was considered the most feared spy by the Nazis.

The Beauty of Dusk by Frank Bruni. An absorbing memoir about his life and a tough medical situation. ♥

Pearl Five  

“Enthusiasm is common. Endurance is rare.” ― Angela Duckworth ♥

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

♥, Wendy

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!!

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. ♥


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In Endless Summers

A Hack to Stop Your Next Food Free-for-All

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How to find the treasure in your next binge or overeat.

Pearl One

When this smart eating hack occurred to me, it practically knocked my flip-flops off.

Let’s say you overate a little bit or maybe you overate a lot of bit.

Right here, at this feeling-gross-moment, is where the treasure lies.

I understand that you not feeling so great, but challenge yourself to write a letter or a journal-entry to your future self.

The idea is to see what went downhill and lead to a binge. Write about and think your letter often. Of course, this method isn’t 100 percent, but it will go miles in addressing overeating or bingeing. Make it a habit: overeat? Journal-write about it.

Write at least a paragraph to these questions (this is not the time to be word-stingy).

  • How do you feel – in your body — right now? (Ex: Stomach ache, want to throw up etc.)
  • How do you feel emotionally at this moment? (Ex: I’m so mad at myself. I was doing so well around food and I messed everything up for what?! Margaritas and chips? Wendy’s note: try to keep in mind that you’re normal.)
  • If you’re mad at you, what do you tell yourself at this moment? (Ex: I’m so dumb, what’s wrong with me, why am I so weird around food? etc.)
  • If your internal voice is harsh and critical, where do you think you first heard this type of criticism? (Knowing is important not for blaming purposes, but so that we can address the criticism at its roots.)
  • At that, stack the times in your adult life when you’ve been responsible. Stack at least five. Then do something you couldn’t do as a kid: talk back to the voice who called you names.
  • Write at least three paragraphs on what you’d say to the voice who called you an airhead, again, all in your journal only (“I was twelve!” “I was still learning in life!” Who calls a child an airhead anyhow?!”).
  • What you most want for future-you (give at least three ideas).
  • What do you want future-you to know: (Ex: that it feels awful to overeat because. . .)
  • Do you know specifically what triggers you into eating too much?
  • How can you address the triggers so they lose their power?
  • How do you wish you’d responded instead of overeating?
  • How can you make it more attractive (from Atomic Habits) to stay the Smart Eating Path? (Ex: I can always keep my favorite healthy food on-hand, not get overly hungry, not talk to that combative family member on the phone when I’m too close to the binge food etc. etc.).
  • Can you write suggestions re: what you wished you’d done instead of overeat?

The essential idea is to teach future-you about how terrible it feels to give in. And then give strong ideas that would better than overeating.]And last, revisit your letter as often as needed. Keep it front-and-center in your daily. ♥

Pearl Two

I can turn any food into a “bingeable.” Acknowledging to myself that I’d always use food to comfort, celebrate or numb-out is just how I’m built.

As you know, it’s cake over wine every time.

Acknowledging that I’ll always default head-first into food is an annoying thought, but I also know more about myself and can therefore handle the overeating tendency that much better. ♥

Pearl Three

June’s topic for the month: what cannot be an afterthought in our smart eating lives.

Today’s topic: we’re heading into summer vacations and planning how and what you’ll eat on the trip needs to be given serious planning.

I’ve been a travel writer for sixteen years now, and I never gained weight on trips. Having a solid plan in place and not winging it moment by moment gets all the credit. Whether I was traveling by car or plane, I knew exactly how the food-situation would go down.

Bottom line: Know before you go

Pearl Four

Our book-dessert slot!
You are owed an apology. And the Mountains Echoed by one of my favorite authors, Khaled Hosseini, should have been one of the first book-desserts I shared. The book’s genre falls under both “historical fiction” and “domestic fiction.”

Total honesty: if I’d read a description about this title’s plot I’d have thought, “pass.” But I’d already read Hosseini’s other two masterpieces — The Kite Runner and A Thousand Splendid Suns – so I was all in. When I came up with the idea of book-dessert it was because of books like And the Mountains Echoed

So, that’s my review: 100 percent. (And again, my apologies.) ♥

Pearl Five

  “Living is the art of getting used to what you don’t expect.” Eleanor C. Wood ♥

If you haven’t yet read Aunt Bea, just shoot me an email: Wendy@WendyIrvineWriter.com! 🙂

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. ♥

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In Breathtaking Springs

Why Customizing How You Eat Is Better for Losing After 50

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We customize our lips: I wear a pink lip. You’ve always looked awesome in red.

Hello Thrivers!

I emailed a friend, “I’m pet sitting alone this weekend (two darling snickerdoodles).

She wrote back, “ALONE?!! Heaven, pure heaven.”

She gets it. (Most of us do.) ♥

Pearl One


I love my eating plan, but it’s different from the one you prefer.

I count old – I mean, really old — WW points, you count calories.

I journal-write on my laptop. Others swear that handwriting is far superior.

My triggers are cake or ice cream. Yours is chips and crackers.

I’m a library-fanatic. You love to buy books, underline your favorite passages, and keep your friends on the nearest shelf.

I light up when my smart-list reminds me that I have (homemade) whole-wheat banana muffins in the fridge. You’d rather have a cup of yogurt (especially sprinkled with a bit of Grape-Nuts for crunch).

Podcasts energize me. Podcasts put you to sleep.

I’m an early bird. You get the most done at night.

One size does not fit all. Make smart choices as you tweak your smart eating plan to make it better for your lifestyle. ♥

Pearl Two

I found the day-in and day-out, the decade-in and decade-out of being heavy to be seriously no fun. When I’d go to any event – like a day at the beach or a night of fireworks – I was focused the entire time on my jeans cutting me in half, and planning (silently in my mind) how I’d start a new diet on Monday; the second I got home, I peeled those jeans off and climbed into comfy jam-jams.

There was another part of being heavy that I detested; I showed up at every event or activity actually hungry or on the precipice of hunger.

I didn’t know about Eating Before You Eat. I thought that sticking to my eating plan meant being really hungry.

I hadn’t learned to pack my cold-tote and take it with me everywhere; I didn’t yet have the habit of always keeping a Cliff bar in my purse.

It didn’t occur to me that arriving somewhere hungry would wake up my cave woman who’d take immediate control and begin her search for the highest calories around.

I didn’t see the connect between hunger and a natural drive not to look for an apple, but to head for whatever “full-bodied” dessert I could get my hands on.

Nobody told me that – when away from home — a banana can fix everything. ♥

Pearl Three

Pearl Three’s topic of the month: revisiting Atomic Habits by James Clear

James writes in chapter two’s summary,

“There are three levels of change: outcome, changes, process change, and identity change. (Our goal is identity change. ‘I’m not a donut-eater. Even one leads to four.’)

The most effective way to change your habits is to focus not on what you want to achiever, but on who you wish to become. (‘I’m not someone who eats random food, I much prefer the smart food in my cold-tote.”)

Your identity emerges out of your habits. Every action is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. (I know that every time I dive into my cold-tote, I’m reinforcing the behavior.’)

Becoming the best version of yourself requires you to continuously edit your beliefs, and to upgrade and expand your identity. (‘I don’t even look twice at fast-food when I’m running errands, my cold-tote is becoming my best pal.’)

The real reason habits matter is not because they can get you better results (although they can do that), but because they can change your beliefs about yourself.” (‘Holy cow! I AM a person who uses her cold-tote for my highest good!’) ♥

Pearl Four

I love memoirs. I could joke and claim to be nosy, but reading memoirs really drives it home that I’m not alone in life with struggles, diagnoses, embarrassing moments, difficult family members and so on. And I love reading about how the hero or heroine triumphs in the end.

I came close to not sharing this book because it’s an extreme version of someone’s life.

It’s about a psycho stage mom in Southern California who made Gypsy Rose Lee’s mother look like Mrs. Brady. The mother turns our heroine into a Nickelodeon kid-star thereby ruining her daughter’s childhood. Jeanette spent her formative years making bucks and working like an adult on iCarly and Sam and Cat. (If you hadn’t heard of the shows, neither had I.)

The title – I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jeannette McCurdy – sounds awful (or like parody), but when you read her story the title will make sense.

My review: a super absorbing read and once I was three or four chapters in, I put everything aside to finish this book. (Other favorite memoirs: Kevin Hart’s, Linda Ronstadt’s, Gabrielle Union’s, and Can’t Hurt Me, just for starters.) ♥

Pearl Five

“You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way as you select you clothes every day. This is a power you can cultivate. If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind. That’s the only thing you should be trying to control” — Elizabeth Gilbert ♥

If you haven’t yet read Aunt Bea, just shoot me an email: Wendy@WendyIrvineWriter.com! 🙂

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. ♥








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In Breathtaking Springs

Tools for Weight Loss After Age 50

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Okay, I’m down to the wire. If anyone tells you that writing a book is a breeze, they’re off their rocker.

So Easter is Sunday and my boys’ birthday is Monday. My minimalist-hairy man wants nothing at all, my the-more-the-better kid wants a birthday hoedown that I produced when they were kids. Sheesh. ♥
 

Pearl One

It’s 1923 in New Mexico, and money is tight. Your mother asks you to clean the dirt-floor. You sweep, then pick up leftover clutter by hand.

Fast forward to 2023: you’re tackling your floors again. If you’re lucky, a cleaning crew comes tomorrow. If not, maybe you have a Roomba to do the work. Or, armed with a powerful vacuum, you roar through each room, leaving clean floors behind.

The right tools matter.

Attempting to lose weight – and protect your loss – after age 50 requires the right tools. You’re not part of a poor family living in a dirt house.You have the money to buy a cold-tote, amazing book-desserts, smart food that you love, beautiful measuring cups and spoons, gorgeous tableware (found for a song at a thrift store), new muffin pans if you need them and so on and so forth.

This is not the time to be stingy with yourself. Get the tools you need for this rigorous trek we’re making up the Matterhorn. ♥

Pearl Two  

It’s my belief that we live in the loneliest time in history. Not so long ago, we lived in groups. Human beings weren’t built to be loners living in cabins deep in the woods.

Today’s version of “a cabin deep in the woods”, is not leaving the house, Netflixing for hours, and making constant trips to the kitchen. I mean, we have friends. On Facebook. We stay engaged with life. On Instagram. We get amazing advice from others. Podcasts.

They’re calling it the Loneliness Pandemic and it was alive and well in our world long before Covid. Here’s my take: it wasn’t so long ago that we lived in tight knit groups like villages, and before villages, we lived within a band of cave people working together to stay safe and find food.

For all of the downsides of caveman-life, the upside was belonging.

The phenomenon of “it takes a village” came so clearly to me when my parents were first moving into their assisted living home.

As they were moving my dad in text said to me, “We come from a generation that try our best not to rely or depend on our kids or interfere with their lives as we grow older.”

I responded, “yeah, but think about it. All ages once lived together: grandparents, moms, dad, kids, babies. And everyone worked together. Maybe not your generation but the gazillions that came before your group.”

At the time my sister and aunt were working hard to help my parents and I was trying to point out that family helps family without saying, “Stop being so proud and take the help!”

But – per usual – I agree with me. Our culture is lonely. That elderly man on Monday who wanted to chat about cantaloupe at the grocery store? He lives alone and hadn’t spoken with anyone all weekend.

The 50-something year old woman who shows up at the dog park every day like clockwork? The outing with her dog is the one time she sits down and has long chats with anyone IRL.

And from long ago, I remember Lucille Ball talking about being on a plane and looking down at the zillion of tiny homes below thinking, “Any one of those houses would welcome me in with a red carpet, and yet – I’m paraphrasing – “I don’t have one person who really knows me to go home to.”

So, you know how I recently wrote about the Perfect Storm of Weight Gain being the result of a food-porn culture, the powerful diet-cartel, along with our own wobbly self-esteem? Well, we can add a fourth storm to the mix: the age of loneliness in which we currently find ourselves.

This is my point: we buy the coolest looking car, purchase a gorgeous home that sits on a hill, pack our wardrobes in the prettiest of clothes and we still know exactly what Lucille Ball was talking about.

I’m not suggesting that if you take your therapy dog into the children’s home every week your eating and weight problems will dissolve. You’ll never hear this sort of thing from me.

That said, if we’re feeling crushed under the tonnage of loneliness the brownie fudge ice cream in the freezer will continue to call our name every evening.

Consciously write in your journal about how you’ll begin — in detail — to make it a habit to increase how deeply and often you engage with others. ♥

Pearl Three

In April we’ll take a deep dive into Atomic Habits by Mr. James Clear. Today we’re looking at – one of my favorites because duh — The Law of Least Effort.

James Clear writes, “Energy is precious, and the brain is wired to conserve it whenever possible. It is human nature to follow the Law of Least Effort, which states that when deciding between two similar options, people will naturally gravitate toward the option that requires the least amount of work.*  Out of all the possible actions we could take, the one that is realized is the one that delivers the most value for the least effort. We are motivated to do what is easy.

*James says in the asterisk, “This is a foundational principle in physics, where it is known as the Principle of Least Action. It states that the path followed between any two points will always be the path requiring the least energy. This simple principle underpins the laws of the universe.”

My point: if you bring home the Ho-Hos and place them in an easy-to-reach cupboard, the principle of Least Action tells us that no doubt what you’ll do next.

However, when the Ho-Hos first hop into your grocery cart, just throw them like a major league pitcher back onto the shelf, and then the Ho-Hos won’t make it into your home.

Because you have no intention of driving to the store to hunt down the Ho-Hos, you end up having the cut strawberries — already in the fridge — with a whipped cream hat for dessert,

You see, the Law of Least Effort loves us and wants us to be happy. ♥

Pearl Four

They say that this woman was a badass, but the word barely touches who Virginia Hill was to the world.

Her story, A Woman of No Importance the Untold Story of the American Spy Who Helped Win World War II by Sonia Purnell left me absolutely floored.

This book falls into the historical non-fiction genre and the author knocks it out of the park having researched and written the book in such a way that you can almost feel the Gestapo just steps behind Virginia as she flees France.

Due to this book I will never again say, “but I caaaaaan’t, my foot hurts” or “I’m too tired to do such-and-such.” Yes, we need to honor the challenges in our own lives, but the woman didn’t even receive certain medals once the war was won. Her opinion was, to paraphrase, “none of us did any of it for medals.”

This book will make you proud to be a woman and bonus: you’ll look at your own problems in a new light. ♥

Pearl Five

“We must remember. There is no easy way.” – Ryan Holiday ♥

Have a wonderful weekend, All!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

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In Snuggly Winters

Inspiration for Weight Loss After 50 from Lisa Kudrow!!

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Lisa and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Phone Call

Pearl One

Did you know that Lisa Kudrow was rejected by Saturday Night Live in 1990? Four years before bringing Phoebe Buffay to life in 1994?

True.

And Lisa’s had plenty of company like John Mulaney, Tim Roberts, John Cusack, Rachel Bloom, Cameron Diaz, Geena Davis, Kevin Hart, Mindy Kaling, Ellie Kemper, Jim Carrey and so many more.

I’m just guessing, but Lisa likely auditioned for SNL, praying, hoping, and crossing every finger that she’d landed the job.

Then she got the call.

First, she was probably numb. Then she likely cried for the first day or two. Maybe took in a movie to get her mind off the rejection, and in the evenings possibly had one or two glasses of wine with her ice cream.

“I remember being super disappointed,” Lisa told Vanity Fair, “because I thought, ‘maybe you’re one of those people for whom good things don’t happen.'”

Four years later, she made it happen.

I’m not surprised these days to see a story arc like Lisa Kudrow’s and everyone else in the “SNL Reject Club” who auditioned feeling like they’re this close to being a huge star with the money and the fame and the access to great roles.

Only to have it all ripped away by one little phone call.

My Point

Champions like Lisa Kudrow and the other SNL’s rejects, likely feel awful for days or even weeks after they get the call, but then they dig in their heels and get back to their grueling climb which is why the long list of rejected celebrities doesn’t surprise me. People who’ve “made it” in any field are go-getters who over-deliver time and again. They’ve learned how to talk to themselves to maintain their focus. Sure, they allow themselves time to mourn, but they don’t see a setback as being indicative of anything.

The important takeaway: allow yourself to be moved by Kudrow’s example.

Let her trek inspire your trek.

In your journal ask yourself this:

  • If Lisa was “super disappointed” after the SNL phone call, how do you guess she managed to audition for Friends (four years later)?
  • How do you rally when you’ve felt “crushed”?
  • Why don’t you just give up on smart eating? What propels you forward?
  • What prominent person in our culture inspires you? And why?

When a strong question is asked in front of a pad of paper and a pen (that works), the gems appear. ♥

Pearl Two

Back when we were little, overeating really did keep us tethered to life, giving us comfort, or even delivering welcomed numbness that brings its own relief.

Fast forward decades into the future and the substance that was so calming back then is today, dangerous. Think I’m overstating it?

We’ve both read the articles that say being overweight leads to so many problems and diseases. In my life, I’m certain that being overweight lead to my gallstone surgery and, at another time, falling on my own foot and breaking it.

So, consider reframing overeating from it’s a comfort to instead being overweight doesn’t serve me in my life and only brings disappointment and diagnosis that I can live (literally) without.

This is the moment when I always go back to my “why.”

I don’t mean to overstate it, but the “why” in our lives is everything.

  • I mean, I have tolerated a variety of situations because my sons were my “why” (hello? Paging Chuck E. Cheese, the worst pizza known to mom-kind).
  • I maintained a strong “why” when we pulled our two out of Kindergarten after four months. A loved one didn’t speak to me for a year.
  • I relied on an ironclad “why” as I homeschooled the boys through two moves and into college. (No judgement if you didn’t homeschool your kids, I happen to think homeschooling is like a calling rather than “everyone should do this” kind of thing.)

Two Takeaways

There was a time when food was a comfort. Today, food is hurting us. So, the journaling question is: how do we go into the very core of our being and discover what matters the most to us. ♥

Pearl Three

Our last “stacking” for November. I heard a guy on Instagram say, “Our brains are like a supercomputer. Our self-talk is the program. Our brains are always listening when we talk to ourselves.”

Pull out your journal and write to these prompts. When I wrote, I was quite surprised at some of the answers.

I really love that I . . .

I can always count on myself to. . .

It’s taken time, but I’ve learned to be great at . . .

Learning to manage . . . 

I like that I learned how to . . .

I’m tickled that I developed a habit of . . .

Next write one word to each answer. For example, these were my six words.

I’m saying this stack to myself daily and it’s been especially supportive during tough moments when it seems like the blanket of negativity is descending. ♥

Pearl Four

Pretty pumpkin loaf by thriver, “M”!!

Our food slot. A sweet reader – “M” wrote to ask me whether the whole wheat pumpkin muffins that I love would work as a pumpkin loaf.

I thought, sure, why not? I’m a fan of the muffins because they come in their own serving-size.

But whether you’re team-muffin or team-loaf, I’m repeating the recipe here. I eat these as mini-meals throughout the cold months. And the pretty photo is from “M” too. Yum, right?

Also, this recipe is a go-to for eating before you eat.

Set the timer for 375 degrees.

Mix together dry items:

  • 1 cup flour
  • Ÿ cup whole wheat flour
  • 3 tablespoons sugar (only 3 tablespoons!!)
  • 2 teaspoons baking powder
  • ÂŒ teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/8 teaspoon salt (an eighth!!)

Mix Wet:

  • First, melt 2 tablespoons butter (just 2!).
  • 1 whole egg (add two eggs for more protein).
  • Ÿ skim milk (but almond milk works just as well).

Now the fun part:

  • If you want pumpkin pie muffins: add Ÿ can of pumpkin puree to the wet mix and one teaspoon of pumpkin pie spice to the dry mix.)
  • Want apple pie muffins? Add a peeled and diced Granny Smith apple and a mashed ripe banana to the wet mix along with one teaspoon of cinnamon to the dry mix.
  • Love banana bread? Mash three to four super ripe bananas and along with a teaspoon of vanilla add to the wet.

Bake muffins for 18 to 20 minutes.

“M” baked her loaf at 350 degrees for one hour. Once baked, she sprinkled powdered sugar on top! ♥

Pearl Five

Never, never, never give up.” — Winston Churchill

Two days into the long weekend. Today is the day to give the leftovers to the wild animals or the happy neighbors. 🙂

Have a great long weekend and see you on Tuesday!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I am an Amazon affiliate so if you buy something through a link at this site, I may receive a small commission that won’t impact your price at all.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

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In Snuggly Winters

7 Pieces of Advice I Wish I’d Had when I Started Losing in Earnest (chunked down)

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First we create good-enough success, then comes the confidence. We circle back around, create good enough again and more confident ensues. Compounding confidence, it’s slow, steady, and totally worth it.

Hello everyone!

I haven’t had the greatest week. I dealt with a doctor whom I really love who was surly with me yesterday (I think we had a miscommunication that I need to address); I have a bunch of niggly things to do that are time-consuming; and I still haven’t gotten my Christmas cards out. (For future readers, it’s February 10.)

On with a happier topic: when I first began writing the Friday Pearls, I’d assumed that each pearl would be one- or two-liners max, but because I received such affirming feedback from you (and thank you!!) the pearls grew and grew into the phonebook that they are today.

So, thank you again.

These pearls exist because of you. ♥

Pearl One

(Your Version)

Today we’re talking about what I wish I’d known when I started losing in earnest back in ’97.

Choose Your Favorite

In Aunt Bea I write about the importance of marrying your favorite eating plan that you can live with forever. I like to think of my eating plan like this: I love my backyard and its fence (that keeps the coyotes out); but you should know that my neighbor has a sparkling, gorgeous, well-maintained pool.

Even though the pool looks inviting, I know that I can’t hop my fence, help myself to my neighbor’s collection of pool floats, and kick back for a beautiful (SPF) day in the sun.

An eating plan is like a fence, it constrains our choices and sets us up for a long-term success. Do I have a preferred eating plan that I’m pushing? Nope, not even a little. Some of us need to be gluten-free, some plant-based and others Keto. What plan you choose is between you and your doctor. Once you’ve chosen your eating plan, expect to keep it forever.  One of the most negative things to come out of the diet culture is that a new weight loss plan is being pushed every two years. This is not in our best interest, it only benefits the companies. Find an eating plan you like, and use it as you’d use a fence around your backyard.

(If you haven’t received Aunt Bea just shoot me an email at Wendy@theinspiredeater.com and I’ll send her right to you.)

Jot it Down

Keep a pretty notebook with a pen next to your fridge, and record what and when you eat every single day. Recording food becomes second nature once you’ve established the habit. (And if you detest this idea, read on.)

Twenty-six years later, I’m still at it. Why? Because it keeps me honest and engaged with my daily intake. The whole goal is to stop being unconscious when we eat and become engaged on a conscious level with our food. Plus if you don’t write it down, it’s super easy to eat more than you realize.

If the idea of writing out your food intake sounds like a terrible idea, journal-write about your feelings towards tracking. Something is going on underneath not wanting to track. And by the way, women who don’t want to track are a thing. You’re not alone. Many struggle with the idea of tracking. Journal-write and explore what’s happening beneath the surface of tracking.

We can do this. I may sound cheesy and oddly cheerleady, but we can do this. Just follow my bread crumbs and we’ll get out of the woods forever.

It’s Not Only What, It’s When

It took diligent work and the power of time to develop the habit of not eating after 6 p.m. I’ve found that if I stop eating around 6:00 p.m., I wake up loving the scale.

You guys, if you think I’m full of hops (as my gram would say) check out these two links by heavy hitters in the science/health world:

ScienceDaily: “Eating dinner early, or skipping it, may be effective in fighting body fat.” (www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2016/11/161103091229.htm.)

National Institute of Health: “Timing of Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner. Effects on Obesity and Metabolic Risk.” (www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6893547/.)

Ruin your Meals

I never eat hungry because I always “eat before I eat.” Always. Eating before eating usually means that an hour before a meal with others or any large, tempting meal, I’ll have something like one of the following: a small container of yogurt, a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on whole wheat (easy on the PB&J), an apple or grapes.

Super Smart Eaters

Years ago I learned – thank you Tony Robbins – that rather than asking, “Why Me?” to instead ask strong questions that actually serve you like, “How can I eat today for maximum health?” or “How can I take my spinning workout from forty- to sixty-minutes?“

But then I happened on this 180-degree difference of a question – by writer Dickie Bush — that wowed me:

What would I do to make today horrible? (LOVE this question!!)

Writing is a human being’s superpower. I keep my journal in my computer (One Note or Evernote) where I write and write and write to find answers to my problems. (Feel free to name your journal. Remember how Anne Frank called hers kitty? An adorable idea.)

Journal-writing brings my unconscious to life and the unconscious comes up with coolest solutions and/or mind-shifts. It’s like seeding your garden. Keep at it and beautiful blooms will appear. Just ask your brain strong questions and write out the beautifully scented answers.

The Beauty of Compounding

Say you eat a bowl of Ben and Jerry’s every single evening for a week.

One bowl for a week? No big deal.

But say you eat a bowl of Chunky Monkey every night for a year?

Ohhhh, my bad! You wanted to fit into your bathing suit come summer? Sorry, but compounding is working against you when you OD on Chunky Monkey for 365-evenings.

Now let’s say that you’ve moved your measuring cups to an easy to reach cupboard  (at least two sets of course) and use them at each meal. Let’s also say that you’re eating healthy bites throughout the day like baby carrots, you Eat before You Eat, and you celebrate your tiny-wins – every day. . . for a year? (Heck, even four months.)

Now you’re using the cool party trick of compounding for your highest good.

So, be-be gone Chunky Monkey! Hello sandy beach in June!

The Insidiousness of Self-Sabotage

Self-sabotage may turn out to be a human reaction that’s triggered when our unconscious – our cave woman — is merely working hard to protect us.

Her basic motto is: don’t reach for the gold. It’s way too scary. Just stay in your cave where it’s cozy and protected, and there’s loads of food in the fridge! Do any of these scenarios sound right?

Self-sabotage might be a learned behavior from childhood that we’ve carried into our adult lives.

Or maybe having been disappointed time and again, you’re sick of trying. (You’re done.) But that’s okay: feel “done.” Let your feelings surface and journal-write about them and how sabotage unfolds in your life.

The more you journal-wrote about how self-sabotage unfolds in your life, the more skilled you’ll become at catching the self-sabotaging behavior before it sneaks in and tries to wreck your plans. Don’t let it.

Learning to say, “I see you, self-sabotage, and I know that when you show up, something is likely frightening me” is a great place to start in your journal. ♥

Pearl Two

But what I really, really, really wish I’d known

Here’s yet another “fact” of life that the diet culture has long pushed. They like to tell us that when we do enough of a, b, or c, losing weight will become effortless. The weight will practically melt off. You’ll never have a serious craving ever again!

You guys, if someone tells you this – ever – they’re lying to you. Okay, maybe that’s too harsh, maybe they don’t know that they’re lying because they’ve never had much weight to lose in the first place, so they don’t understand how difficult this trek is for women over 50.

I’m not being cruel, I think we’re stronger and better equipped knowing the challenge that’s before us. I think anything less and the culture is infantalizing us when it says that “losing will be easy.”

Bring the right tools to the lifestyle and losing after 50 becomes a touch – just a touch – easier. ♥

Pearl Three

During the month of February, I’m leaving this slot for talking smart mind-shifts like how important it is to call this endeavor of losing after 50 a part-time job or a hobby.

Today’s mind-shift: we’re first generation trekkers. I’ve often used the image of trekking up the Matterhorn as being as challenging as losing after 50.

I call us the first generation of trekkers because we’re the first to have a handle on how to navigate our food-porn culture. I’m not saying we’re perfect, but I am saying we know so much more than our moms or grandmas knew, and we’re the first to put this intel into action.

Be proud of the role you’re playing in history and take notes as you lose and maintain so when someone asks “how did you pull this off?” you’ll have the details ready to roll. ♥

Pearl Four

If you’ve grappled with the medical system — and who over 50 hasn’t? — this memoir is like a gift from the heavens.

The Beauty of Dusk by Frank Bruni starts a tad slow. I found myself skim-reading and began to think that maybe the book should have been distilled down to the size of an article.

Thankfully!! I did not put the book down (after coming super close). In his early 50s, Bruni had it all: a phenomenal job (New York Times columnist and bestselling book author), friends, family, a partner: he was living his best life. But one morning he woke up with a blurriness in one eye that turned out couldn’t be fixed. Even worse, there’s a twenty percent chance his other eye could go down the same path, rendering him blind.

Bruni shares deeply personal stories about his life, his health and how he manages his world with a (mostly) invisible disability. Bruni layers into his memoir all that was involved with taking care of his once highly competent father who has Alzheimer’s, going through a break-up when he’d just learned his diagnosis, and incredible stories about how different people deal with disease or a disabling condition. Review: worth your time to read or listen on audio. Loved it. ♥

Pearl Five

The greatest lesson I have learned in life is that I still have a lot to learn.” — Maya Angelou ♥

One fun thing about this week: we have snow in our forecast at 100 percent. If it snows in Atlanta, it’s usually a light dusting (what I call “pretty snow”). So wish us luck. Usually when the powers-that-be forecast snow, it doesn’t actually snow. But even the tiny snowflake on the weather report is fun to see.

One last thing: I got my Pringles (I mean, my shingle’s) shot this week. Years ago, my mom’s friend got shingles in her early 60s and it was not pretty. I vowed that I’d get the shot (there’s two at different intervals.) Consider this a gentle nudge.

Have a habit-fueled weekend everyone!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. ♥

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In Snuggly Winters

How the Super Successful Spring Back to Life After an Embarrassing Set-Back

6 Comments

Weebles wable but they don’t fall down

Hello Thrivers!

I’ve been begging my computer to work all day, if you’re reading this I haven’t yet chucked it off the deck.

Let’s begin. 🙂

Pearl One

After Will Smith punched Chris Rock, there was talk that Smith’s career was over. But because I’ve been studying the ultra-successful for years now, my immediate thought was don’t count this dude out so fast, he may very well come roaring back.

Similarly, Elon Musk, interviewed a few years back by 60 Minutes was asked something like, “if Tesla doesn’t work out, will you quit”? Musk said, “oh no. I’ll never quit.”

Last story, did you see the hilarious Leslie Jones on an SNL bit, saying “Oprah got fired at the age of 23. Can you imagine firing Oprah?! It wasn’t a mistake, because she wasn’t Oprah yet, she was just some 23 year old punk who needed to get fired so she could become Oprah. Sometimes you got to fail to succeed.”

If you pay close attention to the successful “failures,” you’ll soon see that the ultras do not go “gently into the night.” They don’t give up because Kim Kardashian and Kanye West treat her badly on the world’s stage.

Of course, you could cry “confirmation bias!!” And in return I’d say, “I’m sorry I can’t really hear you because I’m too busy studying the successfuls and applying their strategies and tactics to my own life.”

The Ultras’ Playbook

Here’s the essential map to how the superstars navigate life: first, they dream BIG, then they create a written detailed plan and finally, they eliminate everything that’s not moving them forward. If a to z doesn’t work, they hop the back fence and kick down the kitchen door to move themselves that much closer to the winner’s circle.

If their country-western singing job wasn’t hitting the right notes, no big-deal, then they’d give being a pop-singer a go, but note how they don’t give up. ♥

Pearl Two

I didn’t plan on writing about the new weight loss med, but the Scarfer said that I absolutely should. So here we go.

I’ve tried to stay mildly current on the diabetic med that turned out to have a nifty weight loss side effect. The diabetic med, now called Wegovy, has being hailed by many wealthy celebs for it’s amazing powers to get thin quick effect.

Here’s how Wegovy rolls.

According to YaleMedicine.org, “Not everyone is eligible for treatment with semaglutide (active ingredient in Wegovy). Doctors can prescribe it for adults who have obesity, with a body mass index (BMI) of greater than 30; or overweight, with a BMI greater than 27 accompanied by weight-related medical problems such as high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, or high cholesterol.”

My first, second, and third thought is, awesome for those who would likely die young from diseases that can come from obesity.

Once a week you give yourself the injectable using the Wegovy “pen” that’s made to be both painless and easy to use.

Yes, there are possible side effects like diarrhea, fatigue, and nausea among others. But not everyone gets side effects and if they do, hopefully they’re mild.

My Experience with Fen-phen

You and I aren’t new to meds that create weight loss. Remember fen-phen?

Back in the 90s I had a friend who had an important high school reunion in her near future. Panicking about her weight she became a devout follower of fen-phen. She lost the weight and looked lean for her reunion. Upon returning home, she had a small stroke. It didn’t hamper her life in a significant way, but still. Scary.

I also found a doctor who prescribed the med for me. I took it for maybe two days before the Scarfer flipped out and said that I was killing myself.

But you should have seen how clean my house was. (We lose weight and have a clean home? Bring it!!)

But Y2K aside, the Scarfer wasn’t usually wrong, so I stopped. I hate it when he’s right. You probably know that the FDA flipped out too and in ‘97 pulled the med from the market because a study showed it caused damage to heart valves along with strokes. ♥

The Crux of It

Whether we try Wegovy today, tried fen-phen back in the day, have a stomach procedure, or use a starvation diet, every external “fix” requires us to embed smarter eating habits, mind-sets and tools into the fiber of our being for the weight loss to actually last.

We’re tired of losing weight with results that don’t last.

If a pill or a procedure comes along that lets us live on Pringles and donuts, sign me up!

But until that joyous moment arrives learning to deal with the food in our food-on-steroids culture is the surest way to maintain a forever-loss. ♥

Pearl Three

I’m keeping Pearl Three short so that this post doesn’t turn into a novel. During the month of February, I’m leaving this slot for talking smart mind-shifts. Today’s topic: I’ve had several ask me how I eat on vacation. Years ago, I would have gotten serious and explained why it’s so important to keep your great habits going no matter if you’re in the Virgin Islands or Vegas.

But these days I explain it like this: Just like I’d never leave my meds at home, I don’t leave my smart eating habits at home either. Oh, I might have one detour a day, but mostly I stay firmly on the Smart Eating Path when I’m far from home. Who wants to return from the trip to having gained five? Not I and I bet not you either. ♥

Pearl Four

Two book-dessert suggestions for you today one non-fiction and one fiction. I love Stephen King, just not his horror-genre so I don’t usually read him, but I did read his amazing and popular book, On Writing: A Memoir on the Craft.

I know, you’re thinking, but lady I’m not a writer. Why read about writing? Here’s the great news: the book is half and half. Part of On Writing is a master class worth of advice, but the book is also his memoir and includes details about the car accident that came very close to ending his life. He’s critical of the driver who plowed into him, of course and he doesn’t hold back his fury at the two women who could have given him a heads up about the goofball driver who hit him in the first place, but didn’t.

Phenomenal read. ♥

Pearl Five

“We are all failures – at least the best of us are.” – J.M. Barrie (Creator of Peter Pan). ♥

Have a beautiful weekend, everyone!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. ♥

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In Snuggly Winters

How I Conquered Inertia and Slayed Overeating

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Did you know that the opposite of couch-potato inertia is Latin dancing? Well, it should be!

Pearl One

Our cave woman likes to think she knows everything, but she doesn’t get us at all.

Remember, the cave woman is the one who cheers us on when we feel the smallest twinge of hunger — along with emotional upset — to eat the highest calories around, but did you know that she also loves to muck up our dreams and plans too? Bummer because she rocks at messing up great ideas.

Let’s take that I’m trying a new Pilates studio. Take a look at how my own cave woman attempts to ruin my plans:

Knowing that I’m headed to an entirely new experience, she’ll come at me full-throttle hurling questions like, do you know how expensive that Pilates class is? What could you be thinking? You have two kids in college. Let me help you out, it’s raining and much too cold to leave the house today anyhow. Maybe come spring. Or once you’ve gotten into better shape so that you don’t embarrass yourself in front of all the scary, new people. (Cause no offense, but your muscles are like overcooked spaghetti.)

She thinks we’re nuts and that if it wasn’t for her wise protection, we’d have been goners long ago.

How to Manage the Buttinsky

Noun. Inertia. A tendency to hide indoors seemingly glued to the couch. Lumpish, draggy, lifeless.

Our cave woman undermines our best laid plans, but she hides behind the word inertia to avoid detection. I say, it’s time to blow her cover: the cave woman and inertia are one and the same!

So when we have phenomenal ideas, how do we override our cave woman’s grip on our life?

First, we acknowledge that our busybody is actually on the scene. She’s at her strongest when we don’t even know she’s around.

When she tells us that we’ll likely be rejected by the other Pilates hard-bodies (her wet noodle thing and all), and will literally die from being rejected, the cave woman is at her best. This is the moment when she’s distracted us with — what sounds like — crystal clear reasoning, but is actually just her way of trying to ruin our sparkling plans.

Inertia (aka cave woman) is relentless and will not quit until we’ve given up our “silly” ideas altogether.

So, how to politely give her a blankie and send her back into the cave?

As I’ve said, we start by overriding our cave woman when we acknowledge her presence. Not knowing that she’s in stealth mode is how she gets away with so much.

Second, we allow her to vent in our journal. We let her list every frightening concern she has and then tell her, “so noted, thank you for your participation.”

Third, eat micro-meals throughout the day so that you don’t ever feel hungry. Just keep the micro-meals packed in nutrition.

Remember eons ago, it was the cave woman’s task to hear the tiniest snap of a twig to then move like lightening to safety thereby avoiding an advancing predator. In modern times, the cave woman is always on high alert and assuming that a saber tooth tiger is around the next corner.

And trying to explain the difference between the saber tooth and a Pilates class leaves everyone frustrated and confused.

But great news: the cave woman is spectacularly wrong. Because in today’s world, her high alert mode isn’t needed to deal with our day-to-day lives.  

I’d like to tell you that as I became more aware of my cave woman it became easier to call her out and send her back to the cave.

But that hasn’t been the case in my life.

While I’m much better at giving her the slip than I once was, I’ve made peace with the idea that I need to use this muscle almost daily to keep my prefrontal brain strong and my cave woman snoozing. ♥

Pearl Two

Now let’s talk about one of my most favorite tools ever. For the win: what is the opposite of inertia?

That’s right!! Momentum! Noun. The more and more (and more) I stopped eating after 6 p.m., the more momentum’s strength fueled my evenings. Getting out of inertia is tough, but it’s worth it because everyone loves the thrill of momentum.

How do we Create the Superpower that is Momentum?

Here’s how I get myself out of inertia and into the beauty of momentum-land as quickly as possible.

Let’s say that you want to read more in 2023. Your to-do list shouldn’t say: read more. Better to chunk “read more” into small tasks for various to-do lists:

  • locate the closest library.
  • visit library and get official library card.
  • At home, go online and order phenomenal books.
  • When the books arrive, drive to library and pick up.
  • Place books in your home where you’ll most likely read them.
  • Now put “read book before bed” (or whenever works for you) on your to-do list.
  • Suggest to yourself that you’ll read at least ten pages each time.

Et voila!

The funny thing is that unwelcome habits can be installed immediately. One time, I drove down a specific road and stopped for a vanilla shake — again, one time –, and thereafter my cave woman assumes that we’re stopping for a shake every single time I’m on that road. These days I stay off that road.

We all get that embedding a fantastic new habit into our daily life means a lot of conscious thought. Make it easier on yourself by using the power of chunking down to bring your new habit to life. ♥

Pearl Three

You know what? It’s tempting to think that losing weight is merely a vanity thing. Not something true adults really bother with. Eat when you’re hungry and move more. What’s so hard?

I also fall into the trap of wanting to look decent in my jeans, but this week I was reminded that being overweight is a lot more serious than merely how we look in our clothes. Being overweight is also the culprit in many dangerous diseases including certain cancers, diabetes, heart disease, stroke and gall bladder disease. (Been there, removed that.)

Problem is you and I were never taught how to navigate a culture layered in food-porn. As you know, it’s a real trick to stay at a healthy weight with donut shops in every bleeping inch of our lives.

And keep in mind, the diet-culture itself loses profit (actually risks going bankrupt) if we succeed at a forever-loss. Same with the fast-food joints and bright, shiny grocery store aisles that showcase chemicals and poison inside every alluring box or package.

This week I’m thinking about a Thriver’s loved one who passed. I wish I’d known W. and had a heart-to-heart with her, maybe could’ve suggested a few ideas. At the very least, tell her that she wasn’t alone, that so many of us fight the food-drug.

It’s my belief that our culture hasn’t done right by the Ws of our world. We haven’t had a conversation about navigating this ever-present substance that’s so available and so easy to abuse.

K, today’s post is dedicated to you and W. ♥

Pearl Four

The Pearl Four slot has become the book-dessert slot where I share what I’m reading and loving this week (thank you once again to Thriver, Ms. B for this wonderful idea). I should tell you that I won’t be suggesting book genres like chick-lit (for the most part), horror, or mysteries (maybe one day, I’ll get into mysteries).

I love books that teach me something amazing, but are also funny, and 100 percent entertaining to read like The One Hundred Year Old Man Who Climbed Out of the Window and Disappeared by Jonas Jonasson.

My book-dessert this week is Standard Deviation by Katharine Heiny and falls under the genre of “humorous/domestic fiction.” Standard Deviation is easy to read (meaning not War and Peace) and I read it in a week of two-hour chunks of time. (I’d make fun of her last name, but I keep repeating to myself, I’m a grown up, I’m a grown up, I’m a grown up.)

The story is about a modern day couple living in Manhattan who’re raising their 10-year-old son who has Asperger’s. But Asperger’s is more of a sub-theme, I’d tell you the theme-theme, but that would spoil the book for you.

I highly recommend this sparkling and touching story. ♥

Pearl Five

Life leaps like a geyser for those who drill through the rock of inertia.” – Tony Hsieh ♥

You’ve all been so sweet writing to wish me luck with my parents moving into their home. They’re going to a beautiful place right in their suburb. Thank you so much for writing and inquiring.

As always, if you liked this post, please share with a loved one.

Have a dessert-book-ish weekend, everyone!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll get some moolah. 🙂

Similar to my favorite cold-tote and one with an adjustable handle

The best book-desserts on the planet

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In Snuggly Winters

My Favorite – Can’t Live Without — Strategies for Losing after 50

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Capital “LOVE” is for our peeps, furry babies and coffee. Lowercase “love” is for food.

Beautiful rustic sign from FarmhouseDecorArt.

Hey Everyone!

Let’s get right to it!

Pearl One

Some of us read every word of these posts – and I love it when you point out typos, I really do! – while others read one post here and another there, but here’s the thing: in not reading 90 percent of this blog you’re missing the full impact of how I was able to lose 55 lbs. and, 17 years later, maintain the loss.

I approached my own initial forever-weight loss and maintenance differently than we’ve long learned to do from your average diet company, diet book, or strenuous, unsustainable boot-camp approach.

Problem is, I haven’t figured out how to say that I have a better way without sounding cheesy.

“I lost 55 lbs. and you can too!”

See how goofy that sounds?

If you have any ideas re: how to de-cheese me, I’m all eyes! 🙂

My Can’t Live Without Strategies & Tactics for Losing after Fifty

I happen to agree wholeheartedly with myself that losing after 50 and creating a forever-loss equals about — oh — a million or so mind-shifts, habits and tools. But if someone said, “right, but if you could only pick three important themes, what would they be?”

I would pick these guys:

1. The Pivotal Reframe that Makes Losing Possible

Years ago, it dawned on me to call losing weight, “my part-time job.” Seventeen years into maintenance I now call it “my hobby.”

As you know, there’s so much involved in losing weight. Sweeping the kitchen of obstacle-calories, asking housemates to please eat junk food out of the house (said with a smile), buying the right foods (and gear like an air fryer) to make the trek a smidge more doable, is all a crazy amount of work.

So, calling this process of losing after 50 “a part-time job” immediately gave me room to breathe. I wasn’t trying anymore to cram my new Smart Eating Lifestyle into every spare nook and cranny of my life (and feeling boiling resentment along the way), but with the “part-time job” reframe, I had the luxury to open windows of time that allowed me to set myself up for success.

2. I don’t let myself get hungry

Could there be a more important strategy? Me-thinks not. You and I have a habit with hunger and it’s not a good one.

Allowing ourselves to get overly-hungry is the sure-fire way to mess up our smart eating plans.

And I’m not only talking about famished-hunger, I’m talking about the kind of hunger that presents itself after a meal when we think, “a handful of peanut M&Ms sure sounds tasty.”

Which was me last night.

And after these many years, the cave woman part of my brain suggested this very handful of candy just last night.

It wasn’t ten or twenty years ago.

It was last night.

Before I started to vacuum up the calories, I realized what was happening — I was still merely hungry — and had a small bowl of cereal. Disaster averted.

My M&M craving? Gone.

Bottom line: nobody makes smart food choices when she’s hungry.

My tactics: live life with your cold-tote — packed in smart food – by your side. Always Eat Before You Eat. And never, ever return home hungry.

3. I Plan and Plan and Plan

In case you’re wondering, maintaining a 55-pound loss after age 50 is no picnic. So planning is a monumental part of my day-to-day.

My tactics: On Sunday afternoons, I make food that I can grab on the run like my whole-wheat pumpkin muffins; I hard boil eggs. I make two servings or so of brown rice. I read restaurant menus online in advance of entering the venue. I keep junk food out of my kitchen and smart food beautifully displayed in it. ♥

Pearl Two

If you’re new to the Inspired Eater, you should know that I was a butterball from age seven or eight until about the age of 42. (If you’d like the details re: my fun life with food, check out theses two links: About Me and Begin Here.)

One time in my 30s, I was at a casual meeting with four or five colleagues and the issue of weight and healthy eating came up. The group started chattering away about how they eat well by bringing such-and-such to work and . . . then they all looked at me, grew silent, and quickly moved onto the next agenda item.

And you know what?

It didn’t really bother me – yes, it hurt a little – because at that point I’d already lost ten or fifteen pounds and knew that I was headed for a forever-loss. I was new to the group and these women didn’t know how far I’d already come.

This sort of experience is why I say, “I understand. Being heavy is hard for a gazillion different reasons and losing the weight is super hard because, well, we LOVE food!!”

And that’s my point: we don’t need to love food in all caps ever again. We’re taking ourselves from capital LOVE to lowercase “love” when it comes to food.

Same with actual meals. Don’t make dishes that taste GREAT!

Make delicious food that’s good enough.

See the difference? We can love food that’s a B- and keep the A+ gob-smacking, unbelievable food as the rare treat.

Let others think what they will, we know we’re headed some place special (and it’s called a “forever-loss”). ♥

Pearl Three

A funny celebrity story. Remember how Renee Zellweiger gained about 30 lbs. for Bridget Jones’s Diary? Well I laughed when I heard her once say – and I’m paraphrasing – that she was perplexed to realize that to gain weight, one donut wouldn’t do the trick and that she’d had to eat many calories along with other high-fat foods to plump up for the role.

It’s good intell for you and me. It’s not one cone, one slice of birthday cake, or one bowl of mac ‘n cheese, it’s the amount that matters (and, yes, I know you know, but I wanted to share anyway).

You and I aren’t usually food-hungry or we’d stop at “one” of whatever food. When we plow through many, many calories we’re starving for something much deeper.

And the only portal I know of that takes us to our super wise sub-conscious — on a daily basis — is journal-writing. Ask yourself quality questions such as, what was happening inside of me the moment before, the hour before, the day before, the week before, and the month before I chowed the leftover pizza from last night (my sons were all, “what happened to the pizza?”). It’s powerful: give your highly-evolved sub-conscious a voice and watch her amaze you. ♥

Pearl Four

For some time we’ve used Pearl Four to talk food that’s both tasty and nutritious, but I’m pretty tapped out. I think I’ve shared my reliables: stir-fry, whole-wheat pumpkin (or banana or apple) muffins, really good fruit in the summer, and smoothies. If you’ve found a super helpful food please share in the comments below. We can all use a new food that makes our trek a little less daunting. Include how I make smart food on The Inspired Eater: Fed Up.

That said, have I shared with you that there’s an almond milk that’s just 30 calories? I live on it. While it comes in plain, I love “vanilla.” You’ll find it at your grocery store with the other milks.

Our new Pearl Four is thanks to a suggestion by Ms. B, who asked that I share good books. Great idea!

Here goes.

My habit is to try several books each week and ditch the ones that don’t work for me. I read to about page 10 or even 20, but if something doesn’t improve, back into my library bag it goes. I promise to only share amazing books that I LOVE (caps intended; books deserve it).

The author I have for you today is Matt Haig who authored two incredible, wowza books:

The Humans. When you first start reading The Humans you might wonder if it’s a non-fiction and then think that maybe it’s sci-si. It’s neither. It’s a five-star read, infused with a bit of magic, that’ll make you happy to be a human. The story is about an alien who’s been tasked with visiting Earth to see what humans are all about. The alien inhabits a dad’s body and goes home to “his” family. It’s a fish-out-of-water story and has humorous moments, but it’s touching and wonderful and please read it.

The Midnight Library. This Haig-masterpiece is about a woman who isn’t so thrilled with her life. Nothing’s going her way and she’s done. She ends up in a purgatory that takes her down several cool life-threads. If you’ve ever wondered, what if?, this is your read. And Haig outdid himself with the ending.

I highly recommend both The Humans and The Midnight Library. They’re easy to read and you can plow through each in a weekend. ♥

Pearl Five

“What did you think? I would not comeback? See I am back.” ~ Invajy ♥

I LOVE this quote (again, caps intended). The idea being: don’t ever give up. So what if you ate the entire bag of Doritos and your tongue is numb and orange? Ditch the drama, journal-write about what went south that led to the emptied Dorito bag, and then do your “ta-da” comeback (we’ve so got this).

I would love it if you’d follow me on Instagram and/or Twitter!

And if something touched you in the post, I’d appreciate it so much if you’d share it with a loved one.

Have a dessert-book-ish weekend!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. ♥

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