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Beautiful wreath at Notable Wreaths.

Dear Thrivers,

Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you read the Aunt Bea post (you’ll find her to the right under my short bio). After you enter your email address, Aunt Bea will be sent to your inbox. If it didn’t arrive, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

Onto our Friday pearls!

Pearl One

The importance of an epiphany: ‘Something has fundamentally shifted and we’ll never be the same again.’ For so many of us, our epiphany re: weight loss came when we saw a picture of ourselves at a heavier weight than we preferred.

But an epiphany can be small like when I finally understood that I had to wear protective earphones when my son plays piano loudly; or huge, as in: it occurred to a friend at a gut level that she’d never get her dream job without a higher degree (her words).

I see our lives bursting in epiphany-wisdom in various layers throughout the years; one year we may get it that eating pizza regularly will forever clash with our health goals. While another year we might understand that cheese itself isn’t helpful to our smart eating lifestyle (which is why I call cheese a spice).

An epiphany takes time to bake in the oven. It can’t be rushed. We won’t have five in a week or even in a month. Sometimes they appear at the weirdest times (while cleaning the shower) or in wondrous moments (when beholding a rainbow).

Make room for the epiphany in your life. And the moment it descends write that beauty down because some things are too wonderful to leave to our over-50 memory. (Well, I’m just saying.)

Pearl Two

First, a note about ‘success stories.’ While the thriver’s story today is about losing a significant amount of weight, I want you to know that success is also about creating a strong new habit (or dumping an old one), speaking up when ordering in restaurants, or sharing a new ‘aha’ in your life.

This Success Pearl comes from B. —

I’m 73 years old and want to remain thin, active, and healthy! I never want to ‘Go on A Diet’ again.

As a child: Mom was a good Southern/country cook and I was never a picky eater — but we ran and played and didn’t gain weight. As an adult I began to gain. My husband and I were child-free, and we indulged ourselves. The kids came later, but the habits were established.

This time I lost 30. Twice before I lost 50 lbs. (and gained all or most of it back). Every time I’ve been successful, I counted calories.

The hardest part was getting off-track at holidays and family gatherings, beating myself up and then giving up! I was so disheartened at losing seven then gaining it back over and over again.

The Inspired Eater gave me my new mantra: It’s a lifestyle! I have an eating plan, make sure I have healthful snacks in the house and write down every bite. 

This time I made a New Year’s resolution — unusual for me. I resolved to Just Count Calories and not fret about the weight. I made it my mantra and it was freeing for some reason. I guess it was the beginning of a lifestyle change.

My thoughts for others would be: buy yourself a steno pad. Plan what you’re going to eat. Write down every bite. Don’t con yourself. Don’t beat yourself up! 

I wish I had known that Dieting Means Temporary Weight Loss. 

My BMI is now 23, I’m at my lowest known adult weight and never imagined that I could be so. In fact, my weight is still inching down. 

I’m a licensed childcare provider. I cook good food for my little ones. My best habit is eating what I planned to eat. The negative habit I got rid of was overindulging in the foods I prepare for them and finishing off the leftovers.

I’m surprised that I have been this successful without a lot of self-deprivation or self-pity.

Another mantra: I am not a garbage disposal and I will never go on a diet again.

Well done, B.! It would be wonderful to catch up with you in six months!

Pearl Three

Let’s live differently and capture it with a cool journal writing prompt. So much wisdom comes from writing about our challenges versus just pondering them. I write in my journal about something bugging me almost every day.

Don’t deny yourself this powerful method of discovery.

Ask yourself the following:

What lifestyle would I design for a dear friend who had an ultimate plan like mine (e.g. developing smart eating habits)? Get super specific and write about how an average day would go.

What would I want her to know?

What three things could she do that would make a huge difference?

What are three inescapable facts you know she’ll need to understand?

What would you tell her about the challenges that’ll come her way and what do you tell her about handling them?

If what she’s shooting for is difficult, what do you tell her about hard times and ‘staying the course’?

Now apply the answers to your own life and keep this wisdom where you’ll see it daily.

Pearl Four

Food Alert! Five thumbs up on the yum-o-meter! I’ve written about these tasty guys before, but I “found” them again at Costco (meaning I’d forgotten) and want to share them with you (in case you’ve forgotten too).

They’re called Spinach Egg White frittatas and you get 20 in a box for around $14 (yes, they’re pricey). The words “egg whites” kind of freaks me out a little – not a huge fan – but these mini-frittatas are truly tasty. You’ll find them in Costco’s frozen section generally to your right as you enter the store; also near the bagged frozen fruit. (Calories for one single frittata: 70, fat: 4 grams, fiber: 1 gram, protein: five grams, sugar: one gram.)

The taste is great and the convenience just as awesome because we can nuke for a minute and be out the door with something delicious in our cold-tote.

Pearl Five

Everything gets easier when you stop expecting it to be easy.” – Tim Grover

With the three-day weekend upon us, design each day so that Tuesday-morning ‘you’ will awaken very pleased.

Shoot me an email if you’d like to be a success story. Oh, come on, brag a little! It’ll help the rest of us. Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com

See you on Tuesday!

♥, Wendy

Beautiful rings and photos by Lindsay from INDVapparel.

Pearl One

As I slowly lost 55, I was only beginning to learn how to put food into its proper place in life. No longer would it be a vast theme park where I’d regularly visit Lasagna-land, Cinnamon roll-heaven and French Waffle-island.

Somewhere in the late ‘90s it occurred to me that the person who became 55 pounds overweight, wouldn’t be the same one who lost and preserved a forever-loss.

Only one snag.

Unconsciously, even the mere idea of change freaks human beings out. Oh, I might talk big about moving from the West to the East Coast, but when we actually moved to Virginia? I was a basket-case.

Today, I love Virginia and miss it like crazy (we’re in Atlanta now).

Soothe Yourself as You Transform

Even positive change is a thing human beings rail against. And losing weight definitely means changing. I can hear you saying, of course I want to go down two pant-sizes. Who wouldn’t?

Today I’m sharing my top tool for calming my brain down as I lost weight.

Say a young girl is told for the first twenty years of her life that she’s a caterpillar. Somewhere in her late 40s she realizes that, no, turns out she’s not a caterpillar and thinks being a butterfly sounds more like it; that being a caterpillar was never who she was in the first place.

As she slowly transforms from being a caterpillar to a butterfly she’s heard it’s super smart to soothe herself with supportive self-talk along the way.

  • I’m becoming a butterfly and that’s okay.
  • I’m becoming a butterfly and “slow and steady” wins the race.
  • I’m becoming a butterfly and the other butterflies will like me.
  • I’m becoming a butterfly and I’ve got this.
  • I’m a butterfly and being the best butterfly I know how to be.

The need for positive self-talk will never go away.

Simply taking a caterpillar and pushing her to become a butterfly doesn’t work. Too fast and all is lost. The caterpillar needs to be talked to often and gently as she transforms into her butterfly-self.

But cute metaphors aside, I knew that change doesn’t come easily to humans. So I used the same positive self talk as I was losing that I use to maintain today. Just like the butterfly.

Pearl Two

Losing and maintaining “is a journey, not a destination.” Ralph Waldo Emerson gave the world this fantastic concept, and I just tweaked it a bit for our purposes here:

Reframing weight loss from “I have to lose twenty” to “I’m developing ironclad habits that will have my back forever” is the aha moment we most want in our day-to-day eating-life.

Pearl Three

The self-sabotage department where “busy” has become our get-out-of-jail-free card. Who has time to pack petite carrots into a cold bag for errands? I’m so insanely busy I can barely catch my breath. Eating “just has to” take a backseat.

Even though I know better, I also tell myself that I’m too busy to vacuum; too busy to work out; too busy to chop my vegetables for the week. Don’t your understand?! I’m just too busy!

I’m so busy that there isn’t time to live the parts of life that really matter most to me.

Pearl Four

When my kids were little I had no use for Daylight Saving Day when we “fall back” an hour. It was very simple: more daylight equaled more park-time.

But now that my sons are older I’m taking a new look at this “holiday” that falls on November 7 in 2021.

This year, I’m hacking daylight saving time to my best advantage.

Here’s my plan: I currently wake up at 7 a.m. with the rest of the family. I would love an entire hour to myself in the morning.

Alone.

One hour.

So when we fall back an hour this year, my alarm will go off at 6 a.m. while my body still feels like it’s 7 a.m. (And, yes, I know I’ll need to go to bed earlier at night.)

If you could use an extra hour in the morning, join me!

Pearl Five

Perseverance is failing 19 times and succeeding the 20th.” ~ Julie Andrews

Stick with me guys, with an eye towards maintaining we’re going to crush this holiday season!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

I’ve been asked if I could include something like Buy me a Coffee on the Inspired Eater. So if you feel up to sending a coffee, I am a devotee. You’ll find the coffee “button” to your right. And, as always, thank you so much for reading the Inspired Eater. ♥♥♥

A cool new habit can throw a bad habit off the cliff!

Hello Thrivers!!

I’ve returned from an exhausting week. Nothing bad to report except two very long flights. If I plan far enough in advance – Southwest can be booked six months prior – I’ll still get the great rate without the insanely long day.

I know, gas prices are bonkers, but if you’re going somewhere fun this summer, share your plans in the comments below. I love hearing about trips!

Onto our pearls.

Pearl One

It’s my belief that you and I are at the dawn of a new era where we crush the myth that women over 50 can’t lose or maintain weight loss.

Here’s why I’m optimistic: we’re beginning to note how invested our culture is in romanticizing enormous food intake.

Consider Carrie Underwood who came out with a new song last Thanksgiving called Stretchy Pants.

The lyrics go:

I’ve got my place at the table, can’t fit no more on my plate
I’ve got my fork in my hand ready to stuff my face…

Lovely.

And it would be lovely if our culture only chowed with abandon once or twice a year, but instead we’ve been habituated to think that every co-worker requires a birthday cake; November and December is about inhaling trillions of calories; and summers wouldn’t be summer without a freezer packed in ice cream.

And these days people wonder why so many of us reach for our stretchy pants year-round.

Attempting to maintain a loss after 50 is not possible without first fully absorbing the idea that our food’s on steroids and is being “pushed” at us every day, in every way.

The Mad Men behind the food products are paid well to create powerful ear-worms that do their duty long after we’ve heard a commercial. I know you remember:

Hold the pickle, hold the lettuce,

special orders don’t upset us…

Or:

Oh, I’d love to be an Oscar Myer Weiner,

That is what I’d truly like to be…

Food-pushers spend bucks on TV commercials, billboards, podcasts, print ads and the like telling us that our lives aren’t good if we don’t eat their burgers. So their ads encourage us to buy more and more of their product.

Because, let’s be real, nobody creates ‘hit us over the head’ ads for broccoli.

My point: when we struggle to lose after age 50, it isn’t a testament to our lack of control in the past that we’re down five pounds, up eight. Our food-porn world pushes calories the way cigarette companies once pushed ‘coffin nails’.

And then we also have the diet-industry that hocks ‘lose 10 in ten.’

Between these two giants — food-porn and the diet industry — we shouldn’t be so fast to skewer ourselves for not fitting into our size 10 shorts.

Understanding what we’re up against is required for our ultimate Smart Eating success.

The Takeaway: Start to notice the endless food ads in your life and design an entirely new thought-habit for yourself. Say, hmmm there’s another and another and another food ad. These food-pushers really are everywhere. I think I’ll count how many fast food stops I see on my way to work today.

And a supportive habit takes root.

Pearl Two

For months now I’ve noticed that I use new vocab for living well on the Smart Eating Lifestyle. It’s occurred to me that a glossary of sorts would help new members come aboard more seamlessly.

I don’t have the full glossary created yet, but here’s a sampler of what I do have (and if you have suggestions for the glossary, email away!! Wendy@theInspiredEater.com).

Our Glossary 🙂

Ban perfectionism – Attempting to be perfect is just one more way that we give up on ourselves.

Bite-o-meter – How many delicious bites we get from a food. (Ex: salads deliver a lot on the bite-o-meter.)

Book-in-the-bed – Wonderful way to ditch the evening calories and chill before sleep.

Conscious deserting – thoughtfully choosing a dessert like these.

Cookie Monster – Going berserk and inhaling the highest caloric items we can find.

Contrarion – Living quite differently from the larger group.

Daily details – Setting ourselves up for success is in the daily details.

Distraction eating – Boredom eating is a sign that we need some excitement in life.

Dessert-book – The lowest calorie option for “something good” after a tiny dinner.

Drastic dieting – The old, unproductive way of attempting to decrease weight.

Errand companions: car-banana or my cold tote filled with healthy bites.

Feedback device – Our scales (I didn’t use when losing, but I do use to maintain).

Food titans – the people behind the mass, brainwashy food ads: fast food, grocery stores, restaurants.

Food tools – Actual food for our kitchen that supports our Smart Eating Lifestyle.

Maintenance – Protecting our hard-won losses.

Mouth happiness – Healthy food that’s fun to eat like cherries or petite carrots with hummus.

My tummy — A souvenir from the babies.

Smart Food List that we keep taped inside a cupboard. This important list reminds us how to fill up and get out of a hunger zone quickly:

  • My blueberry-apple-oatmeal bowl.
  • Small cup of yogurt.
  • The whole wheat, one-teaspoon peanut butter and half of sliced banana.
  • A hard-boiled egg on toast.

Snooze-food – Healthy, but excruciatingly boring food (e.g. the old way of eating).

Strengthening and holding – What we once called ‘plateauing,’ we now know is strengthening our current loss.

The Elaine – order two side salads and combine in large bowl.

The skill to chill – Working with ourselves on how we best relax vs. inhaling the kitchen (different for everyone).

The three E’s — Every-emotion-eating (or stress eating).

Thriver – You and me, our group living the Smart Eating Lifestyle (who understand that slips are part of the game).

 Pearl Three

Let’s live differently. Visiting my parents was interesting. My mom has Alzheimer’s and my dad is taking care of her and I’m still stunned at how well my dad is managing.

That said, he practically embraces anxiety. He even said, “Well, we got everything done today. Now I need something new to worry about.”

It’s funny until you realize that he’s serious. It’s like he adopted a bad habit of needing something to ruminate about even when all is going well.

So, then I wondered, do I do something similar?

I don’t look for anxiety, per se, but I have caught myself feeling sad at times when given two seconds of thought deep-down I felt happy. It’s possible that somehow I feel safer aligning with the negative feeling assuming that if I feel too good the other shoe might drop. (I’m not suggesting this makes an ounce of sense. It’s another bad habit I need to break).

My takeaway: there are times throughout my day when I consciously tell myself, It’s okay to feel good. You love your writing (this blog). The kids are doing well. You’re planning a Trusted Housesitters (.com) ‘job’ for the summer. And the rug is vacuumed. Things are good.

Writing this message on note card and perching next to laptop.

Pearl Four

Food! I’ve long had a habit of loving to read while crunching something like Cheeze-Its. And those salty orange guys don’t exactly fit into my life anymore.

But here’s what I can crunch without a second thought:

  • Cherries – Late May to late July.
  • Watermelon – arriving in June!
  • Cut up peaches – May to August.
  • Strawberries — June.
  • Petite carrots – not a fruit of course, but a bowl of petites deliver crunch and sky-high nutrition.

This weekend you’ll find me at Costco filling my cart with fruit.

Pearl Five

A nail is driven out by another nail; habit is overcome by habit.” — Erasmus

I’d love to share your success story. Anonymous of course. And a ‘success story’ doesn’t need to be pounds lost. It can be establishing a new habit, embracing a new mind-shift or dealing well with a challenging event.

A positive habit, new mind-shift, or meeting a challenge is true success. Send your stories to me: Wendy@theInspiredEater.com.

I’m spending the weekend getting back on schedule from my California trip’s jet lag (made worse by terrible flight schedules).

Have an uneventful, relaxing weekend and see you on Tuesday!

♥, Wendy

P.s. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

Three to 400 years old, we’re spring chickens compared to this thriving Charleston treasure.

Happy Friday Thrivers!

I hope these pearls find you enjoying a peaceful spring day.

A quick aside for our new Thrivers: Welcome! And have you read the Aunt Bea booklet? You’ll find her to your right in the box under my circle bio. Enter your email and she’ll land in your email, but sometimes she prefers spam so you might want to check there too.

Pearl One

While so many of us stress-eat, plenty of us also boredom eat which is why it’s important to infuse our over 50 lives with fun.

And fun is different for everyone.

But first a caveat: I’m the last to blithely say, “Just have a fun life and you’ll lose 80 lbs.” No, that’s not how weight loss works, but as you and I continue to embed solid smart-eating habits, it’s important to add happy habits too into our lives as we go forward.

That said, I’m going back into braces. Yes, I know I’m 57. As a tween I had railroad tracks, but today my teeth are like tiny Leaning Tower of Pisas falling into each other. After my last cleaning my dentist politely said, “you might think about braces.”

So I thought about braces.

I then located an orthodontist I like, at a price I love, and I’ll be in veneers by mid-May. I’ll keep you posted.

Now it’s your turn to tell me about how you’re thriving.

Gems from our Journals

Share your version of braces. Tell me about what excites you most in life. (Magic seems to pour out of our hands when we write about our lives versus merely thinking about our world. The real action happens when we combine the two.)

What is the most fun you’ve ever had?

What do you wish you had more time for?

If money weren’t a thing, what would you do for fun?

What pricey thing – kayak, road bike, camping gear and so forth – has been pushed to the back of your garage, very lonely without you?

If you’re certain that you have little time for, say, kayaking write about how you might create time. List all of the way you could block out windows for fun.

Give at least ten answers. Be silly: Welp, I can kayak at two in the morning and forgo sleep. And then be serious: If I stop lingering over coffee on Saturdays, I could kayak then.

Come up with ten responses and be ready to marvel at what spills forth. (I’d love to hear what’s fun for you, please share in the comments section below.)

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

Take a look at the different ways we can bring more fun into our lives.

I have an acquaintance whose husband just went through a harrowing lung transplant and is doing beautifully today. This person learned so much about supporting the transplant patient (her hub) as well as the caregiver (herself), she became a life coach specializing in supporting partners and families going through the transplant journey with their loved one.

I know a woman who trained as a lawyer in her younger years, but gave up lawyering to become a midwife. Similar story but the mom became a doula.

Fun can span the gamut from sliding the kayak into the river and helping to birth babies to getting — oh, I don’t know — braces!!

Pearl Two

Blooming as a Thriver. We’re entering a new era for women over age 50, 60, 70, and 80. Our over 50 lives won’t much mirror our grandma’s or even our mother’s worlds.

We’re living differently.

These days we’re busy. We’re maintaining high expectations for ourselves, doing hard things, and continually growing into the newest chapter of our lives.

We’re committed to a smart eating lifestyle – as best we can in our food-porn culture – by embedding five-star habits into our days (and evenings) because we’ve learned that eating well not only feels good, but also helps a plethora of ailments and diseases. And it sure doesn’t hurt the number on the scale either.

We workout because it feels so satisfying to have sore arm muscles after weight lifting or tired legs after a long bike ride.

We may not have maintained weight loss in decades past, but life is changing and you and I are adapting. Our losing after 50 trek — with the right mind-shifts and habits — can be a reality for us all.

Pass it on.

Pearl Three

In April’s Pearl Three we’re talking: “Let’s live differently!”

Here’s how I’m living differently this weekend: I plan to keep a positive attitude, locate the silver lining when facing problems, and compliment myself at least three times each day on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. And I’ll write the compliments in my journal.

Today I’m complimenting myself for learning to get along with my little sister. Shelley lives in Tucson and the two of us have had a hard time being sisters. But we’re now going on four years of no serious arguments. We actually both deserve a pat on the back.

I’d love it if you’d share what you’re complimenting about yourself today.

Pearl Four

A reader wrote that she wished she could follow me around for a day to see what I eat and when. Yikes – like – no.

Those who worry that I eat perfectly at every meal, these next sentences are for you.

While I’ve given up evening sugar, I still have fun food with my morning coffee. Today I spotted a leftover snack package of Almond Joys that didn’t make into a care package.

Huh.

Okay maybe I went a little bonkers on the AJs (sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don’t). I love coconut. And coconut with chocolate and coffee? I’m in. I washed the AJs down with leftover Peeps (no, I won’t say how many I ate – I do have some dignity to maintain – but I can share that they were pink).

I hope you’ll join me in kicking the evening sugar habit. It wasn’t easy initially, but the longer I went the no-sugar route the easier it became. Today when I think about having a handful of peanut M&Ms after dinner, I automatically remember my no-sugar track record and think, no bleeping way am I blowing fourteen months now. The hardest part of going no-sugar in the evenings is over the first two weeks. It really does get easier the longer you work to instill no sugar after dinner.

Back to our smart eating path.

The healthy foods I’m into at the moment:

Hard-boiled eggs. Low in calories, high in protein, and they’re quick to grab on the run too. Ideal little snack.

Greek yogurt, plain flavor. Also low in calories and high in protein. And once you get used to the taste delicious with grapes.

Now is a great time for a Costco run to pick up fresh fruit.

Costco also carries a fantastic bag of frozen veggies called Stir-Fry Vegetable Blend that you’ll find in the refrigerated section of Costco where they keep butter and eggs. I lightly heat a teaspoon or two of olive oil in a skillet and throw two handfuls of the veggies into the oil and heat them up. Then I add brown rice.

After I pour the veggies and rice into a bowl, I add low-salt soy sauce. Yum, and a great way to get your veggies.

What foods are you into these days?

Pearl Five

A dear friend played an active role in planting seeds in honor of our friends in Ukraine. The group had a sign up with a quote I thought you’d love (and it definitely goes with our thriving theme).

They said they would bury us, they didn’t know we were seeds.”

Get sweaty this weekend!! (The endorphins are a feel-amazing cocktail. Let’s get tipsy on endorphins together!)

♥, Wendy

P.s. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime. 🙂


Now here’s a habit I could happily instill! 🙂

Happy Friday Thrivers,

If you haven’t read the Aunt Bea booklet, she’s a must. You’ll find her to your right in the box under my circle bio. She should land in your email, but sometimes she goes to spam. If you lost her, just say: Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll shoot Aunt Bea right to you.

And away we go.

Pearl One

Back when I first began to lose weight in earnest I couldn’t have told you, “Not only do I want to lose weight, but I also want to stop wanting food.”

I couldn’t have told you such a thing even existed. Soothe-food like ice cream and chocolate cake would be my substance of choice into my 90s. End of story.

These days when something truly abysmal is happening in life, I don’t reach for food.

You might think, oh she’s making it up. Or, she was never that into food in the first place.

No and no. Food was my cocaine. Bored, celebrating, sad, didn’t matter, I turned to food.

So, now the question could be: how — when everyday life goes ka-blooey – do I avoid going Cookie Monster on the kitchen?

I know, you’re bored with this answer.

What I’ve done is to create a new response system to problems with the development of embedded habits, habits, and more habits. Once I instilled ironclad habits into my life, the scale began to drop.

Habits first, scale second.

To hone your habits, read or re-read Atomic Habits by James Clear. This jewel of a book came out in 2018 and is still on the best seller lists. The author talks “three layers of behavior change”, why bad habits are a breeze to create while good habits are a struggle, and why systems are far more important than goals.

To keep myself on track I re-read Clear’s book once a year-ish.

Habit creation compounded leads to the numbers going down on the scale, for sure, but also an eventual break with a substance we can’t do without that’s legal, cheap, and culture-approved.

But with the right mind-shifts and knowledge we can take down this substance one kickass habit at a time.

Pearl Two

It takes bravery to attempt to lose weight after age 50. Think I’m being melodramatic? Well, consider this: when we climb back onto the smart eating path – having tried to lose/maintain many times before – we risk setting ourselves up for disappointment, irritation and boredom.

At our age it just seems easier to forgo the whole damn thing, and “make peace” with our body. Which I’m all for of course. Unless you can’t see your GP without her bringing up the weight situation (again). Or watch as you continually bump up in pant sizes. And don’t so much love looking in the mirror and seeing your Great Uncle Joe staring back at you.

See? It takes bravery at our age to climb back onto the horse and ride it night and day until we’ve peeled off the extra 40 lbs. we’ve accumulated over the last many decades. But even that doesn’t require as much bravery as planning the maintenance phase of losing 40 lbs.

In the past, losing a lot and then maintaining has been the bane of our existence.

Nobody had figured out the maintenance phase, until now. This is a new era for women, health and our bodies. We decide at what weight we feel most comfortable. We choose the best maintenance weight. We grew up loving Karen Carpenter. We know the tragedy of over-dieting. Princess Diana showed us the danger in bulimia. And Elizabeth Taylor was a model for why not to yo-yo diet.

No, those roads — paved with sadness — aren’t for us. We’re older and wiser and have zero interest in being lured into poor eating habits. Creating healthy bodies is our thing these days.

And it takes bravery to trek in this new era.

And that’s okay because we can do brave things.

Pearl Three

In April we’re talking: “Let’s live differently!”

In a word I tend to fritter weekends. I have long Saturdays or Sundays, and later look back thinking, um, exactly what did I do, enjoy, or sink into?

I have some weekends when I don’t even read. I might bake or tidy here or there but I don’t go at projects with gusto unless forced like right before a trip or a big holiday like Christmas.

This coming weekend, I want to do it differently. I want to relax, of course, but I also want that cool feeling of crashing into bed with a good-tired feeling of having packed a lot into the day and feeling grateful for sleep.

How will I create a fun, relaxing, yet beautifully full weekend? Now that’s a good question. Definitely one for journal-writing which always produces an array of gems.

I hope you’ll journal-write about how to create a successful weekend with me.

Pearl Four

Let’s talk food! When I was slowly working towards eliminating sugar in my evenings, I did not go from downing eight Oreos to never eating sugar. Nope. I never could have done that. Instead I went from a bowl of ice cream to allowing myself only what would fit into my small ceramic cup. (And in keeping with the spirit of the cup idea I did not cram as much as possible into it.)

At one point I went to a relatively healthy dessert of dark chocolate, a marshmallow or two, and a tablespoon or so of nuts.

I kept treading in that direction: smaller, healthier, smaller, healthier, until I finally challenged myself to give up evening sugar for 66 days and boom.

Good-bye sugar! (More details on how I did it here.)

Pearl Five

You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.”

I’d love to feature those of us with success stories. I hope you’ll write (Wendy@theInspiredEater.com) telling me about your success and not minding too much if I ask a question or two! 🙂

Go big this weekend, but in a kind, happy way that’ll see Monday-you wake up thinking, “huh. Very cool.”

♥, Wendy

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

Aren’t these calories beautiful? Yep, that’s how they lure us.

Hello Everyone,

If you haven’t yet read Aunt Bea, just shoot me an email: Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get her right to you!

Pearl One

Not proud, but when we travel, I spend us right out of our budget. I think, oh it’s all in fun, or I’ll deal with the expense later. And, but we’re making memories!

I once bought a pricey shirt in a boutique that when the vacation-glow disappeared all I had was a stupid shirt that didn’t fit and I couldn’t return.

And that’s how I travel-con myself.

My point, you and I are awesome at the food-con: We’re in Maui! Of course I want a second pina colada!! Life’s hard, peanut M&Ms sound perfect. And what’s the harm in a third of slice of pizza?

We tell ourselves that “this time” will be fine.

This time is never fine.

How to get “clean of the con.”

The long and short of it is that if we continue to food-con ourselves, losing weight can still happen, but maintaining the loss? Next to impossible.

So, given that you and I are masterpieces in progress, let’s get real about our cons slowly. First, keep it close to your heart that (other than conception) truly amazing plans don’t happen overnight. (These last words are more for me; I get caught up in wanting something this minute, this day, this week all the bleeping time.)

Teasing out how and where we food-con ourselves is vital. I recommend learning more about yourself and your favorite food-cons through journal-writing. Be creative and have fun with the following:

  • Food-wise how do I con myself in a typical day? A typical weekend? A typical month?
  • What’s something(s) good that I get from the con? (This question is key.)
  • Could the con be merely a bad habit at this point in my life?
  • How do I keep myself stuck because of the con?
  • Why is slowly moving into the truth about the con off-putting?
  • What would my life be like without the con?

In my case, overeating had everything to do with needing to zone-out. As a kid I had to stay vigilant moment by moment. It was exhausting.

So, shoveling in calories while I was reading or watching a show was the ultimate in relaxation. Decades later my life didn’t involve being on guard anymore, but the overeating habit stuck.

Being over 50 means we’re wiser. We know what works and what’s a con. Getting utterly truthful with ourselves is of course seriously hard.

But the best things always are.

Pearl Two

I’ve been trying to figure out how to say this without sounding like a jerk, but when I was losing weight I said these words to myself daily: do not get smug, I am not smug. I’m never smug.

I didn’t want to lose 30 and feel like, Look at me! I’m so cool, losing weight is a breeze. Somehow I knew that I had to always, always, always remember that losing – and maintaining – was so incredibly difficult, and getting smug was merely the beginning of a downfall.

Pearl Three

This is the space where we talk about using time for a great outcome. Today’s question: What’s the hardest time of your day to stay on the Smart Eating Path? Get super detailed.

Avoid being too macro as in: afternoons at work are hard, or evenings ruin everything for me.

Be super specific and say: Immediately after dinner, I want something sweet, so at 6:45 p.m. I’m hunting for the Oreos. Or, I’m great until 9 p.m., but then I want ice cream while I’m watching Bridgerton.

The more you drill down on your most difficult moments of your day, the more successful your intervention.

Journal-writing is how we engage our subconscious. And here’s the thing: our subconscious is super intelligent and wants to share her knowledge. Also, she’s thrilled to be invited to the party (she mainly feels ignored). Journal-write to these questions and watch her in action:

  • What is the hardest time of day for me to veer from my Smart Eating Plan?
  • How can I have compassion for myself re: this difficult time of day? (Ex: I forgo a healthy afternoon snack and am hangry by the time I get home. Of course I’m not doing well after work, I’m running on fumes!)
  • What would make it easier for me?
  • What do I associate with eating (unplanned) food?
  • What is the smallest effort I can make to better deal with my hard moments?
  • What is the largest efforts? (Be creative with this one.)
  • How can I approach my difficult time frame with strength?

Continue journal-writing on a daily(ish) basis about your hardest times of day, and watch your subconscious become a trusted best friend.

Pearl Four

The Egg McMuffin. Calories: 310. Fat: 13 g. Fiber: 2 g.

Thanks guys, but McNo.

If you haven’t yet developed the habit of never eating fast food, make this habit rock-solid in 2022 (my favorite study out of England says it takes us 66 days to truly embed a habit).

Fast food’s backbone is made of chemicals, trans-fats, salt, sugar, clarified butter and the like, and the “meals” concocted by scientists to keep us addicted to their fake food is how they make billions.

Don’t succumb to their evil wizardry.

This morning I scrambled one egg with a splash or two of almond milk and a sprinkle of cheddar, and toasted a whole-wheat English muffin and put it all together. When I’m feeling really crazy I’ll nuke two slices of Morningstar Farm bacon – fewer calories and fat grams than actual bacon — and put them inside my McYum too.

Pearl Five

Stop lying to yourself. When we deny our own truth. . . we deny our own potential.” — Steve Maraboli.

Happy April Fools Day! I’m sorry that I’m not a jokester and don’t have any funnies!

Create an amazing weekend for yourself. 🙂

, Wendy

P.s. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime. 🙂

No spoilers, but Betty Draper spits out her whipped cream.

This blog won’t make sense until you read the Aunt Bea booklet (you’ll find her on this page to the right, under my short bio). After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. Or just email me: Wendy@WendyIrvineWriter.com.

Pearl One

Let’s begin with commitment. Did you see Mad Men? The main character, Don Draper, is married to Betty. No spoilers, but in one season tiny-Betty gains a lot of weight (for her), and in another season decides to shed the pounds.

We watch as she participates in WW meetings so we get that she’s ready to lose, but it’s not until Betty arrives home one day that we learn how very serious she is about slimming down.

The scene: After yet another exasperating experience with Don, Betty arrives home and heads immediately to the fridge, pulls out a can of whipped cream, and squirts it straight into her mouth.

But then, we also see Betty run to the kitchen sink and spit the whipped cream out without having eaten any.

At that, we understand: the woman is committed.

Trust me, showing ourselves that we’re committed to losing/maintaining after 50 is crazy helpful. Here are a few ways I showed myself on the regular that I was – and still am — 100-percent-in!!

For example, I:

Devoted myself to losing slowly knowing that losing quickly throws our bodies into a state of panic worried that we’re starving ourselves and will die. Similarly when I plateaued I knew that my body needed the time to adjust to my most recent loss.

Called myself a “thriver” allowing me to look at my experience in the world differently: my life wasn’t stagnant, I was learning, growing and improving – in some way – every day. Even as I plateaued.

Learned to journal-write about living the smart eating lifestyle. I’ve learned so much from my own writing (because the writing moments are when our subconscious comes to life).

Emptied my kitchen of junk food and asked my husband to put his treats where I couldn’t see or reach them.

Stopped hanging out with friends who’d turned overeating into a hobby (I know this sounds harsh, but it needed to happen). More on this important topic here.

Decided to manage Costco’s treats by making a serious beeline around the junk food aisles.

Became really good at saying, “no, but thank you” when friends or family would offer food that didn’t agree with my smart eating lifestyle.

Took a cold bag of food with me into the car for errand-running, trips and so forth. I still take a cold-bag with me to this day. Being hungry in public is a major no-way.

Realized that I can “fun eat” five percent of the time, but that I’d “fuel eat” the rest of the time.

Pearl Two

“Hope is not a strategy” say so many (but maybe Vince Lombardi was the first). I love this quote because it emphasizes the necessity of committing to making big wins real versus crossing our fingers.

But then, I wondered, what is the difference between strategies and tactics? Here’s what I found:

Strategy: I’ll improve my health by eating more vegetables every single day.

Tactic 1: I’ll eat a vegetable with every meal of the day.

Tactic 2: I’ll pack at least one veggie into my cold-bag every day for drives.

Tactic 3: I’ll snack on a bowl of veggies when reading or watching a show.

One more example.

Strategy: I’ll become super knowledgeable on how habits form.

Tactic 1: I’ll read – and re-read — Atomic Habits by James Clear and The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. My review: Wish these two excellent books were around when I was in high school.

Tactic 2: I’ll pick one habit to create as I’m reading Atomic Habits.

Tactic 3: I’ll write in my journal about the positive habits I’ve already created.

Pearl Three

Using Time for Good. I wasn’t that great at losing until I embraced the idea that losing (and maintaining) after 50 was a part-time job.

I needed to feel good about the hours of chopping veggies, boiling eggs, shopping for the healthiest food, taking a walk each day, filling a cold-bag for errands and so on.

Once I called losing a part-time job, the time I spent on developing better habits for a smart eating lifestyle felt beautifully worthwhile.

Pearl Four

Snacking. Back in the day, I loved kicking back on the couch, reading, and sticking my hand over and over into a bowl or box of something tasty: Cheeze-Its were my go-to. But almost anything would do as long as it wasn’t real food. I’d crunch through caramel corn, Oreos, even baby marshmallows mixed with nuts and chocolate chips. (It was my own little food party.)

That’s how healthy I was.

Fast forward to today: I still love reading while dipping my hand into something for my mouth, but these days I make a bowl of petite carrots, baby tomatoes, and coined cucumbers. I love the crunch of veggies. Note: the baby tomatoes especially need to be fresh from the store. Wait too many days and they have a mushy mouth-feel to them that I don’t like.

Sometimes I chunk up a Honeycrisp.

In the summer it’s grapes, cherries and watermelon.

I worried about telling you how I snack because I’m afraid it makes me look goody-goody like, “well, isn’t she special?”

Trust me, it took mega-time to associate healthy snacking with a good book. But if I can do it, you can do it because I keep saying and will never stop: there is nothing unusual about me. The only difference between you and me is that I’ve accumulated these mind-shifts over the years. And that is it.

Pearl Five

“To do anything to a high level, it has to be a total obsession.” — Conor McGregor

Make it a fantastic weekend, everyone!

♥, Wendy

P.s. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime. 🙂

Hello Everyone,

As always if you haven’t yet read Aunt Bea, the how-to is underneath by short bio on the right of the screen, but you can always email me for a copy: Wendy@theInspiredEater.com.

Let’s begin:

Pearl One

I received this email from a reader last week:

Good Morning Wendy,

Great encouragement today. I had a very positive doctor appointment yesterday. Both nurse and female doctor wanted to know how I’m losing weight; throwing it away. I told them. Doctor said my lab work reflected the weight toss. Fabulous!

I’m recording my blood pressure now every week or two and if it starts to consistently be below 120, my doctor will take away one of the medications. A nice positive to weight toss.

— M.

Possibly going off a medication?! Congratulations, M.! Super exciting.

M. continues to lose, and it’s interesting to note that we don’t have to whittle down to a size 10 to see real health benefits. Sometimes losing ten here and stabilizing (once called plateauing), and ten there and stabilizing brings exciting news from the doctor.

Pearl 2

I want to be crystal-clear: I’m not anti-heavy. I think it’s completely wonderful that our culture embraces the “well-insulated” among us. I wish young-me could see the careers of Ashley Graham, Oprah, Melissa McCarthy and Rhetta. Young-me would have been too astonished to speak. I was “healthy” during the Charlie’s Angels era; it was a painful time.

Today, I love that the world is catering to those who need a seat belt extension on airplanes, trendy clothes, and even furniture that can support larger weights.

It’s beyond cool that these days the young people label themselves as “thick” or “healthy” when discussing their weight. I also love that in this century we have all sizes on TV shows (Orange is the New Black and Good Girls take top honors).

If you’ve been following for awhile you’ve heard me say this before: if having a terrible life without seat belt extenders and cool clothes helped, we’d all be a size 4. It’s actually the opposite: being good to ourselves is the starting point for attaining the real rewards.

Need a great read for the weekend? Check out this memoir on a phenomenal man (he’s a writer by trade so keeps the story super interesting): Elephant in the Room: One Fat Man’s Quest to Get Smaller in a Growing America by Tommy Tomlinson.

Pearl Three

Our March topic: Using time as a supportive tool. I’ve never met the person who wakes up and chows all through breakfast, lunch, and afternoon snack, but goes really whole-hog for dinner and dessert.

Here’s why we’ve never met her.

I doubt she exists. Neither you nor I know anyone who inhales all day and all evening because largely we don’t overeat all day long.

We all have smart eating hours and not-so-smart eating hours in a day/evening.

My point: since we likely maintain a smart eating lifestyle for most of our day, let’s begin by acknowledging ourselves for keeping it healthy at, say, breakfast and lunch. Note the times of day when you’re eating healthy food for fuel (rather than for fun).

Only then can we explore our hardest moments. Tease out which hour of the day  and which days or evenings sees you reaching for 10,000 calories.

The hard moments are the perfect place to explore what’s going wrong and how to make a better plan for long-term success. Write in your journal about how you’ll stop yourself from overeating at night or on the weekends or whenever your hardest moments arise ( I use books, motivational podcasts and often just go to sleep early).

There can also be hard environments (I eat candy at work because I’m stressed) or hard people (I have an eating buddy, ’nuff said).

If you want more details on breaking an overeating habit read here: How to Conquer Your Evening Sugar Cravings and Disrupting An Annoying Food Craving.

Pearl Four

Pear Four we talk food. Have you ever noticed how many junk foods can be wadded up into a ball and tossed in trash basketball-style? (We’re talking about you, Hostess Cupcakes). And that, conversely, healthy food gives us more bites on the bite-o-meter (equaling more mouth-happiness)?

Well, today we’re discuss how to add more ingredients to add more bites to our lives.

That said, take a look at how to up the bites on favorite foods:

After the fun of Omicron in January I developed an odd need for childhood cereals. Turns out, TOTAL cereal isn’t all that exciting until I remembered to add a sliced half banana. Sure enough: extra delish bites.

A reader is the queen of sandwich stacking. She adds thinly sliced apples and pepper jack cheese to her protein sandwiches. Yum.

Inspired by the queen, I now stack my black bean burgers on whole wheat with thickly sliced cucumber, and green sprouts (and mustard). Omg. Excellent.

Additionally to my very large lunch salads (greens, cucumber, petite carrots, baby tomatoes) I add fake chicken (high in protein) from Trader Joe’s or sliced, cooked polenta also from Trader Joes.

I think we’re always on the right track when we’re working healthy foods into our meals more crunch, more health, more mouth-happiness.

Pearl Five

Look for the discomfort that precedes the distraction, focusing in on the internal trigger.”

I put wild bird food out each morning — the guys go bananas for Costco’s — and kick back with my coffee to watch Mr. and Mrs. Cardinal, the beautiful woodpeckers, and tiny finches eat their breakfast.

As you go about your day, remember that there’s no way to “fail” when you’re living the smart eating lifestyle, if you overdo it, journal-write about what likely triggered you, buy flowers for yourself and get on with life.

♥, Wendy

P.s. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime. 🙂

Hi Everyone,

If you’re brand new to the Inspired Eater, look to your right. Underneath my round photo and short bio is how to access the Aunt Bea booklet (no charge).

The booklet will be sent to your email, so if you don’t see it, check spam. Without Aunt Bea it’ll be difficult to get the most from this blog. 🙂

And, as always, if you lost your Aunt Bea just let me know: Wendy@theInspiredEater.com and I’ll send one right away.

Onto our pearls!

Pearl One

Before my boys were born I remember thinking, of course I can wake up and be functional at two in the morning for babies; the cat wakes me up every single night.

Right.

That’s how clued-in I was.

But as the little guys grew, I fell so in love that I once asked an empty nester, “Is it awful when they leave the house?”

Her reply, “Oh, no! It’s like a whole new chapter! It’s wonderful!!”

Over time, I infused her attitude into my life.

Here’s why her response matters: a lot of us over-50-types have ridden the horse on the weight loss carousel far too many times. We’re not exactly bitter, but we are very — very — suspicious.

However, for everyone who has said to me, “losing weight has never worked. I just don’t have the motivation anymore”; I’m thinking, because you’re seeing life like it’s a linear line.

It doesn’t have to be linear.

It can be a full, engrossing, can’t-put-down book.

Take how cool our current chapter is: nobody yelling for us in the dead of night, nobody taking all of our money, and – hey! – no more thrill rides on the PMS- roller-coaster.

Yes, we have health problems. Yes, partners disappoint, but no we don’t have to downsize our dreams and plans right along with our clutter.

Maybe “losing weight never worked” for 40-year-old you, but today-you can go for it and create an entirely new, successful chapter for yourself.

Pearl Two

Living an intentional life. I love this concept. An intentional life is all about not being blown wherever the wind flings us. It’s about focusing on what matters most to us and directing the action.

Let’s not be actors memorizing a script that someone else wrote. Instead let’s be the director and producer of our world.

Years ago, Scott Adams said – I’m paraphrasing — that when he wanted to achieve something huge, he’d write it down on paper 15 times a day.

I don’t think there’s anything magical behind 15 times a day versus 12, but his point is good: we need to stay devoted daily to our ultimate plan. We need to set ourselves up for success in myriad ways and stop putting our precious energy into activities that produce very little.

Intentional living is about taking the reins from our default-selves, and pointedly bringing our prefrontal brains to the party.

So let’s don’t “hope” for a good day, let’s intentionally make it a good one by writing every morning about our ultimate plan and why it means so much to us. Then let’s re-visit our writing two to three times a day. Heavy emphasis on the “a day.”

And consider joining me in writing my plan 15 times each morning plan.

Pearl Three

Our March topic: Using time as a supportive tool. Today we’re talking about the time it takes to establish a solid habit. As I’ve mentioned my favorite study out of England concluded that it takes 66 days to fully embed a habit.

And when I was extinguishing my evening sugar-habit, I found the studies’ 66-days to be true. You can read more about how I overcame evening-sugar here: How to Conquer Your Evening Sugar Craving.

In establishing habits the first two weeks are the toughest. After the 14-day mark, establishing or eliminating a habit becomes much easier. Knowing that the first 14-days are hard is good information to have because we know what we’re up against difficulty and can plan accordingly.

Take this week. I once created a remarkable habit – for me – of going to a yoga/Pilates class two to four times a week for over two years. Given that I have no love for fitness activities this was like a bleeping miracle. Sadly the woman who owned the studio moved and I let my habit dissolve.

But good news: I’ve found a new studio that’s much closer to my house. It’s a bit pricier, but if I use the two-classes a week plan, I can swing it.

To establish this habit, I’m re-reading James Clear’s book Atomic Habits. If you haven’t yet read this awesome book, eat it this weekend for dinner. It’s that good.

Pearl Four

Food. This food-suggestion is for those among us who love to mindlessly crunch something tasty while kicked back on the couch reading or watching a show. Back when, I could easily take down a half box of Cheeze-Its while reading (they were “reduced fat,” so maybe okay?).

Today, when I want to graze while reading it’s petite carrots. It took time to move from decimating Cheeze-Its to reaching for petite carrots, but if I can do it, you can too.

Also, dipping tiny carrots into hummus is a great tide-me-over too. Costco sells hummus in tiny one-serving packs perfect for our cold bag when we’re out and about (don’t forget a baggie of petite carrots). Trader Joe’s carries my favorite hummus flavor: cilantro and jalapeno. Yum. And for those snacking on chocolate humus (K!), that is a “to don’t.”

Pearl Five

“There is no time for ease and comfort. It is time to dare and endure.” – Winston Churchill

Intentionally create a fantastic, smart eating weekend for yourself!

, Wendy

P.s. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop, some links may be affiliate links and as an Amazon Associate, I may earn from qualifying purchases. Of course you incur no additional cost.

Me cuddling my River. Have you seen the meme, “What do you mean ‘I’m not a people?’ You tell everyone I’m your baby.

Hi All!

Many have asked about my furry-boy’s health. River had his ultrasound yesterday and the vet said he’ll call today. Thank you for caring. We have wonderful dog people on here! 🙂

Onto the pearls.

Pearl One

First a caveat, I’m so thankful for the self-help world; I’ve benefited greatly. So please don’t think I’m dissing self-help. Not at all.

Given that, I’ve spent the last five decades reading self-help books, listening to cassettes (lol) and to podcasts these days. And I love a good TED Talk.

But somehow I took in a super subtle message – just lightly layered into the self-help vehicles – that high self-esteem is essential before we can create something of value (in our case, taking back our health; losing and maintaining after 50).

And yet I’m proof that the theory is completely wrong! I lost 55 lbs. and have kept them off for 16 years now, and I’m a total goofball.

Turns out, we don’t have to be heads and shoulders above the average. We can feel so-so inside and still produce incredible results.

Here’s what happened for me.

Back when I initially got serious about renovating my eating habits (mid-30s), my self-talk was lousy; my confidence maybe a C+ depending on the moment; and, my courage? Well, I can see where you might say that I was being semi-courageous in a situation or two, but on the whole, I utterly freak out when I’m supposedly “being courageous.” So, not sure that counts. (Still haven’t mastered that “staying serene in a crisis” thing.)

And yet – even with iffy self-esteem, I lost the 55 lbs. and have maintained the loss.

Our Takeaway

I love that we don’t need the confidence of Oprah, the emotional strength and courage of Brene Brown, or the brains and stamina of Sara Blakely (Spanx).

We can be an emotional mess and still lose and maintain after 50!!

Isn’t that the best?! Doesn’t that just open up the whole world to us? We don’t have to “have our act together” to get out there and make it happen.

My new mantra, please join me: we can be mushy on the inside and still create amazing lives for ourselves.

Because always remember: I’m not special. I’m just like you.

Let’s take the iffy path together.

Pearl Two

“I’m trying to lose weight.” That word choice “lose weight” is said like it’s a one-off thing we need to accomplish.

It’s akin to saying I’m going to college.

You know and I know how much is involved in heading to – and being in — college (e.g. massive red-tape, years of trying to stay awake in class, semester after semester of cram-studying, freaking out when you get an F on algebra and so much more.

Yet we still hold to the notion that losing weight is merely about sticking with an eating plan. Bada-boom, right? In my experience, wrong.

Of course finding the right meal plan for ourselves is vital, but it’s not much different than taking our SAT. We need a good SAT score to get into college, but we all get that — while it’s necessary — it’s merely the very beginning of college life.

There’s a Grand Canyon size difference between seeing losing weight as a simple process – eat on my plan – versus having a deep understanding of all that’s involved in losing after 50.

We’re like the student who enters college as a caterpillar and four years later emerges a beautiful butterfly. I know I’m throwing a lot of metaphors in this post, but we’re going through a butterfly-transformation ourselves when we’re losing and maintaining after 50.

Pearl Three

Each month I’m using this spot as the place to dive a little deeper. Our March topic is: Using time as a supportive tool. Here’s today’s topic: when I have a craving or a food-idea that’s not exactly on my smart eating path, I’ll ask myself, can I wait ten minutes?

It took time to practice my ten minute strategy, but I’ve learned that cravings and “bad ideas” actually dissolve fairly quickly.

Cravings are like clouds. They meander in and then they drift out.

Ask yourself, can I wait ten minutes? Then set a timer and do something absorbing. When the timer rings and your craving is gone, immediately have a healthy mini-meal.

Because largely a craving is merely a sign that we’re hungry.

Here’s the ten minute breakdown:

Step one: Have craving.

Step two: Can I wait ten minutes? Set timer.

Step three: When timer rings, craving is gone.

Step four: Immediately eat a healthy mini-meal.

Pearl Four

Do you remember restaurants in the 70s that had a “diet plate” option usually at the bottom of a menu? It was like half of a canned peach, wilted lettuce, a hamburger without a bun, weird looking slices of tomato, and a blob of cottage cheese.

Blecky.

And yet today, I love (low fat) cottage cheese.

One half cup: 90 calories, 2.5 grams of fat, and a whopping 13 grams of protein.

I don’t know what kind of magic potion they dumped on cottage cheese, but whatever it was it worked!

Pearl Five

“The most important day is the day you decide you’re good enough for you. It’s the day you set yourself free.” ― Brittany Josephina

Beautiful quote. Speaks straight to my heart.

This Tuesday I’ll detail how I prep for a trip with the plan to enjoy myself without coming home with extra pounds.

Create a lovely weekend for yourself.

♥, Wendy

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