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Happy Friday, Thrivers!!

It’s been pointed out to me that my posts are too long. So I planned to keep this post short.

I’ll do better next week.

Pearl One

Let’s Talk the “S” Word.

I was planning to use Pearl One for another topic, but I just received an email from a sweet thriver who wrote about the success she’s having:  she’s down 44 lbs. since April 2021!! I LOVE hearing about those who trust the process of losing weight slowly.

If the weight loss happens a bit at a time, our cave woman slumbers in her cave, not feeling her presence is needed. Take it slowly with the many plateaus that are actually a good thing. (It’s just your body adjusting to the new weight.)

Our thriver brought up an important topic she wrote, (the trainer at the gym) said not to weigh myself!! And you weigh yourself every day. Maybe you could write about that sometime please. Cheers!!

The scale. Is anything as revered or hated as much as your average bathroom scale? On one side we have “Team How Could I Survive without my Scale?” And on the other side is “Team My Ears, My Ears! I Just Heard Talk of He who must not be Named!”

Here’s my take on the “S” word-drama.

The scale is merely a feedback device. Nothing more, nothing less. Many of us associate scales with the hurt, pain, and humiliation we experienced as kids when we were forced to step onto the scale. Totally get it. I have my own stories.

The reason the fitness industry is absolutely not a fan of the scale, however, is that muscle weighs more than fat, so if we’re working out we may — in theory — be gaining muscle, and today’s scale doesn’t differentiate between fat and muscle. So, the scale-haters, say “scales aren’t giving us useful information. What the point?”

Then we have the team who has no intention of ever giving up their scale. Their point is that the scale helps them know if what they’re eating is working or not.

I live somewhere in the middle. I don’t have a knee-jerk reaction to the word “scale.”

When I first became wacko-determined to lose the weight for good, I was weighed at Weight Watchers once a week. Then I got pregnant with twins, and of course stopped losing weight. A few weeks after I had my babies, I started WW meetings again. (I wasn’t able to breast feed so losing weight wasn’t a problem.)

I took one baby every Saturday (left one with my hub) and attended a meeting that also had the weekly weigh-in. I’m not in any way endorsing WW. It was simply the plan I picked, but I know many who count calories in their tracker living on the Mediterranean Diet, the Keto Diet and others. (The key: pick a plan you can live with forever. Trying a new plan every so often might be good for the diet industry’s bottom line, but it does nothing for our forever weight loss.)

Within months of being back to WW, I felt ready to be on my own. So I stayed with Weight Watchers “old” point system and was only weighed at the doctor’s office. I’d gotten it into my head that super strong habits come always came first for me.

Finally in my early 40s I lost all of the weight, and still chose to go without a scale for many years; I was still focused mainly on creating good habits. But I was never rabid against using a scale, I just didn’t think I needed it at the time. I (somehow) intuited that smart eating habits were the only thing I cared about. I figured that if I didn’t lose weight eating healthy foods in healthy amounts, so be it. The plan was to live a smart eating lifestyle. Come what weigh. LOL!

Around the time I hit 50 – and was past menopause – I bought a scale and used it every morning. Why? Because being down to a very low, but healthy weight, it was clear that if I happened to to eat a bit too much here or there, I could inadvertently eat myself out of my four-pound weight window. (If I gain weight, it’s only because it’s a conscious choice.)

The Scale-Naysayers

As we move forward in losing after 50, I think it’s super important to gather the info about eating plans, work outs, and the scale, and come to your own conclusion. Some feel safer using a scale, some feel fine without one. I used both tactics. At one time I loved working on my habits only. But these days I appreciate the feedback device for the info it gives me.

If I could talk to the fitness industry as a whole, I would explain that your average woman over 50 – like me – does not work out at the level needed for weight loss.

Sure, some can work out to such a degree that they struggle to get enough calories. Navy Seals, Olympians like Michael Phelps, and devoted marathon runners, okay.

But – I’d tell the industry – we aren’t in the armed forces; we’re not aiming for a place in the Olympics, and I definitely would never qualify for a long distance marathon.

Women over 50, 60, 70, and 80 – yes, we have thrivers over 80 – are past menopause and aren’t training so hard that the weight of their muscles are impacting the scale.

Are there outliers who work out to such a degree that the new muscle is adding weight to the scale? I guess there could be, and more power to her! But I’ve never met anyone over 50 who worked out at that level of intensity.

But always know: there are so many seriously awesome reasons to work out when we’re over 50: the feel-good rush of endorphins for one, fewer falls for two, and the magical properties for our brains!

Pearl Two

In 2012, my best friend, passed. Ollie was a black lab who we rescued from a busy street. An absolute sweetheart.

In 2016, I had back surgery to repair a slipped disc (Heller, Emory. Masterpiece of a surgeon).

In 2019, my first ever car crash. Before I read the accident report, I so worried that I’d caused the accident. I hadn’t, major phew. Nobody was hurt. I had a broken arm, but that was it. (The cars took the impact.)

And so what?! Every one of us has stories. Life is hard, period. Nothing calk-walk about it.

At the beginning of making my wacko-dedication to losing after 40 (that later turned into maintaining 16 years at this writing) I let nothing come between me and getting healthier day by day.

One time at Starbucks I was on crutches and I remember thinking, it doesn’t matter that I broke my foot I will not stop being wacko-dedicated.

As the years careened by and life veered from merely being difficult to once or twice just awful. I did not waver in my dedication to, once and for giving up bad choices food. I was intent on embedding into my core what living a Smart Eating Lifestyle was all about.

So, how did I do this?

1. I made the decision to always put my dedication front-and-center, and I recommitted to the Smart Eating Lifestyle in the beginning at least three times a day. In your journal, write about why you’re so committed to losing weight for the trip, sure, but also aiming at a forever-loss. Then write that sentence into your calendar every day for at least a year.

2. I changed my self-talk and essentially said a version of this to me daily, just because we made a major move from the West Coast to the East, does not give me an open window to stagger off our Smart Eating Lifestyle.

3. Somehow I knew deep inside that chowing ice cream with my family even just once, would lead to a new habit of chowing with the family again and again. It’s takes forever to instill a great habit, but barely a moment to bring on a bad one.

Right?!

Seriously, when you’re ready, get dedicated to living the Smart Eating Lifestyle and check in with yourself about your commitment daily.

Pearl Three

In September we’re keeping this slot for “how I screwed up this week”: the truth is that wearing Invisalign braces has somewhat thrown a monkey wrench into my good eating habits. Every month on the 30th I put in a new super tight tray and the lip/tongue biting thing starts anew.

This time I was ready. I kept myself moderately full and I didn’t go near stores where I could score ice cream or vanilla shakes. (Thankfully I broke the vanilla shake habit in days, just missed a really terrible habit. The longer a bad habit goes on, the more difficult it is to break.) This time around I made a lot of smoothies and ate a lot of mashed food.

I didn’t exactly mess up this week. But I did make a chocolate cake with homemade chocolate frosting — yum-city!! — for one son who loves chocolate. I really wanted a piece, but adhered to my plan of saying to myself, if you really want that cake, you can have it in the morning with coffee.

Which is exactly what I did. So I wouldn’t call that messing up per se.

So instead of saying to myself, woe is me. I can never have fun-food in my life ever again. (Whimper, whimper.)

I say, If I want a slice I can have it in the morning with coffee.

The REP (Royal Eating Plan) is alive and well. If I want something fun and decadent, I tell me, just have it in the morning. The most wonderful part of the REP is that I never feel left out because I “can’t have” what everyone else is having. I can have it, it just has to happen in the morning

Check out this study that came to the same conclusion as me, they call it “food-timing.”

Pearl Four

You guys, you will feel so virtuous eating this dish. Even better, it’s full-on yum!

A bunch of sweet potatoes showed up in my kitchen today. So I skinned two, and chopped them into cubes, then swished them around in a bowl with the following:

3 Tbl. Olive oil

Balsamic vinegar (I love Costco’s)

One small sweet onion (chopped)

2 garlic cloves or a Tbl. of the minced garlic that comes in a jar.

A pinch of salt and pepper.

To roast, I put parchment paper on a baking sheet (optional), and tossed the sweet potato squares onto the parchment.

Turn on the oven to 400 degrees. Let the squares roast for on one side for 15 minutes, pull them out of the oven, and turn them over. Now roast for another 20 minutes. And you’re good to go. (I had to play around with the temperature and time in the oven because initially mine weren’t golden, but black. So keep an eye on them.)

While the sweet potato and onion were roasting, I made brown rice which is super easy. All you do is boil 2.5 cups water. Once the water is in full-boil, add one cup of brown rice and then bring the rice to a boil (happens in seconds). Finally put a lid on the rice and turn the stove down to simmer for about 50 minutes.

I only wish I had had broccoli and baby tomatoes, because then I’d have felt triply virtuous!! I found this keeper of a recipe on AllRecipes.com.

Pearl Five

Three months from now you will thank yourself.” — Alex Peterson

The Holiday Healthy Weight Challenge!! Okay, we’re at seven weeks and six days until the U.S. Thanksgiving. My goal is to workout each day on my indoor bike. It’s been up and down. I’m not proud, but I get so impatient with myself because it’s a hard habit to establish. But even when I realize that I’m not riding my bike, I don’t give up, I merely hop on the bike and petal. With any new habit: give yourself good cues, and never give up on the original plan.

Have a wonderful weekend!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I am an Amazon affiliate so if you buy something through a link at this site, I may receive a small commission that won’t impact your price at all.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

A sugar-addict can find her fix anywhere. Just saying. Photo by Wouter Supardi Salari on Unsplash

Pearl One

I have a dear friend who has a rare disease called spinocerebellar ataxia (SCA) that a doctor described as being like MS and Parkinson’s had a baby.

A handful of years after getting her diagnosis, her lovely husband – of 30 years — told her that he wanted a divorce and was gone in a flash.

And finally tested, her two adult kids have the SCA gene too.

Her response to all of this? Before her ex left, she went all-in and found several “adaptive” sports programs that welcomed her with open arms like indoor rock climbing, a weekly Parkinson’s dance group, the YMCA for individual and group classes, and an adaptive scuba diving program in the Bahamas.

But coolest of all, Susan adopted a service dog and by holding his harness can walk unaided. He’s also super helpful if she falls.

Susan’s response to what could be called a nightmarish situation, has been nothing less than spectacular.

Somewhere deep in her psyche, Susan has reached a place of acceptance. Not that she loves what she’s learned to accept, but that she’s made peace with “what is” and is getting on with life.

In Elizabeth Kübler-Ross’s five stages of grief – denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally acceptance – getting to the stage of acceptance doesn’t mean loving what’s happened, it means calling a truce with grief and accepting the reality of the circumstances.

We can actually cycle through the stages of grief in one minute like this: let’s say that I’ve been in maintenance for 16 years now and one evening I see my husband plow through a huge bowl of ice cream at 8 p.m. In the space of a moment watch how I pass through the grief stages:

Denial: He can sit next to me with ice cream. I’m fine. No biggie. Really. I’m fine.

Anger: I say to him,”Do have to eat the fricken’ bowl in front of me? How do you think I feel?!”

Bargaining: To myself, maybe I can have just a little and it won’t matter.

Depression: Why does everyone get to have fun-food, but me? 🙁

Acceptance: I say to myself, look, if you really want the ice cream you can have it in the morning. No problem. But when I ask myself if I want to be a size 8 or eat massive bowls of ice cream, it’s no contest. My wonderful grandma used to say, “in every life a little rain must fall, my darling.”

And so, keeping our Smart Eating Lifestyle in mind as we proceed, knowing which stage of grief we’re in can only strengthen our trek up the Matterhorn (losing/preserving after age fifty)..

Pearl Two

A step-by-step on how to make the first and second week successful, so you’ll have a third week. Let’s say that I want to bring a new habit to my evenings.

In the afternoon of the day I’m beginning to establish the new habit, I journal about how Day One will unfold. I never allow for the cave woman’s attitude “what happens, happens.”

I write in detail about the food I’ll eat (this is different than your tracker, continue tracking as you usually do), the podcasts I’ll listen to, and how I’ll remove myself from rooms and activities (like TV) that in the past I’ve always paired with ice cream. I’ll include what the most difficult moments in the evening will be for me, and I’ll write about how I’ll address each difficulty. Up until the moment I turn the lights out and fall asleep, I follow my plan.

The Steps to Creating a New Habit (or shoring up an old one). What follows is exactly how I begin — in the first week — to create a new habit. This process works for every new habit like giving up afternoon or evening sugar; having a smoothie in the evening versus cookies, cake, and candy (the Big Three), or walking each day for 30 minutes.

My Journal

The idea behind planning your toughest part of the day, is that you’re addressing what’s most difficult when you’re feeling good and aren’t under the duress of a craving.

Then when you get to the time of day that’s most difficult, you refer to the evening plan already written in your journal.

As you know, the first week or two of developing a new habit can be crazy-hard. Staying present with yourself every moment of the most difficult time of day is key (my difficult time is in the evening, yours might be mid-afternoon, or only on weekends).

The idea is that we’re taking ourselves by the hand, and following what we’ve already mapped out in our journal.

So, for week 1 and 2, our goal is to stay in our prefrontal brain by adhering to the plan. In the past, we’ve eaten poorly in the mid-afternoon or evening because we allowed our cave woman brain to run the show. After a long day, we need a break, and it just seems miles easier to let the cave woman run wild.

But she’s famous for making bad choices again and again.

Remember the cave woman will encourage you to overeat the lasagna, drink a third glass of wine, and chow the last of the garlic bread as you clean the kitchen. (This is a good time to say, ask for help. If evenings are tough, ask someone else to clean the kitchen or just leave it for tomorrow morning.)

The moment we engage our prefrontal brain — and lull our cave woman to sleep –, look out. The habit we want to embed in our hearts is just a few journal-planning sessions away.

This is how my journal rolls:

6:00 p.m. — I put all treats that I don’t want to eat, straight into the trash and squirt ketchup into the bag for good measure. (If you can’t exactly trash other people’s food, ask him or her to hide it on a top shelf that you can’t reach.)

6:15 – Eat my sweet potato with a light sprinkle of salt.

6:30 – Write for an hour or so. Don’t hang around to watch everyone have dessert.

7:30 – Listen to one episode of an inspirational podcast; two or three if needed.

8:30 – Evening shower, brush teeth, book/bed. (Currently reading The Gift: 14 Lessons to Save Your Life by Edith Eger. Great book. You might remember Dr. Eger from her first book, The Choice: Embrace the Possible. I’ve never been able to get through the entirety of a memoir about Auschwitz, — ever –until Dr. Eger’s. This woman’s story is so uplifting and I loved reading it, but heads up: I sent The Choice as a gift to a sweet, sensitive friend. She wouldn’t read past page 30. If you don’t do Auschwitz, The Gift is an excellent second choice.

Below I’ve included podcast and streaming suggestions that are motivational or just plain funny to keep you on the straight and narrow. Remember you don’t need to listen or watch a gung-ho podcast about food. You just want something entertaining that’ll lift your spirits.

Take a look.

  • 29 Motivational Podcasts to Inspire You in 2022. I haven’t listened all 29 podcasts of course, but I love many on this list like The Tim Ferriss Show (although I hope you’ll ignore his “cheat day” eating plan) and the TED Radio Show.
  • If you don’t like podcasts, consider watching TED Talks on your device. They’re short and motivational.

The idea is that we’re taking ourselves by the hand, and leading us though the evening based on our planning earlier in the day.

Creating new habits is a challenge, for sure, but master how to keep your prefrontal brain in charge and prepare for success.

Pearl Three

We’re keeping Pearl Three’s slot for what we once called “cheating,” “screwing up” or even “goofing,” today we call “relaxing our standards.” Who’s in?

Title this story: she’s in complete denial or how I relaxed my standards in one week. It all started with four innocent baby marshmallows melted atop my sweet potato. Once I’d had the taste of marshmallow I quickly progressed to handfuls of babies, eventually graduating to the big guys (keeping the count to just four, um, in the beginning).

But just as you’d expect, the time came when even four didn’t give me the fix I needed. Soon, I was downing a third of a bag — at one sitting. I should add: when nobody was around. I know that I need to decouple from the marshmallows and I’ll get to it, just as soon as I finish the last two bags in the cupboard.

As AA says, “Progress not perfection.”

Pearl Four

As you know, I’m a huge fan of taking snacks in my cold-tote. But there are times when I’d like to eat something satiating in my kitchen, so that I’m not super hungry right in the middle of whatever I’m doing out of my home. Don’t get me wrong: I always travel with my cold-tote, but sometimes I want to leave the house comfortably full.

Here’s how I fill my tum: I make a peanut butter and ‘nanna sandwich (thank you, Elvis’s mom) on whole-wheat. If I’m out of bananas, I use strawberry preserves or honey.

Each of these food items on their own are filling, but when put into sandwich mode will “hold me” for a good two hours. ♥

Pearl Five

The pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” – Winston Churchill

Have a great weekend, Thrivers!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I am an Amazon affiliate so if you buy something through a link at this site, I may receive a small commission that won’t impact your price at all.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

Pearl One

In the initial years of twin babies, I knew a bunch of moms because our little people played together in the local park’s sandbox. At the time, I was the only person with two babies, everyone else had one.

Those were the days in which I was sinking. All three of us cried throughout those first two years, but only I tried to sleep at night while they preferred to go on scream-crying.

After one particularly bad sleepless night, I said to a fellow mom, “The other moms seem to be having an easier time. Everyone is better at this than me.”

The other mom laughed as if to say, “That is just your imagination.”

I felt better.

So today – when I receive emails from readers — I get a strong vibe that everyone thinks everyone else is having a much better time of losing after 50.

That they’re more committed.

Having greater and easier success.

And rarely – if ever – “slipping.”

If that’s been the drum beat in the back of your mind let me assure you that three donuts and a handful of small cookies later, you’re absolutely not alone.

Take yesterday morning, My husband and I said good-bye to our latest house sit (sweet kitties) and began the five hour drive home.

But before we went anywhere I requested that we stop and get donuts and coffee for the road.

Yes, we stopped at Dunkin’ Donuts and I picked out three.

I ate one donut every half-hour to make them last longer.

Three.

Why am I sharing?

Because I don’t want you to feel alone. We’re all far from perfect. Everyone goofs up especially given our food-porn culture.

Because there are many.

We all have days that go sideways, days when we blame ourselves for “bad” eating.

Begin to watch your eating from the “observer” perspective. Eat your junk food and then watch yourself return to making smart choices on your own behalf.

So yesterday morning I ate the three donuts. Today I’m having my usual: an oatmeal bowl.

Remember, it’s not the donuts. It’s our response to the donuts that ultimately determines our success.

Pearl Two

A wondrous story from a fellow thriver! My history of disordered eating is almost as old as I am.  I discovered at 16 years that eating a big bag (the really large one) of M&Ms was a wonderful substitute for actually feeling my feelings.  Of course, at the time, I had no idea that’s what I was doing, and that it would lead to a lifetime of eating disorders and disordered eating. 

I was able to maintain my weight, or become underweight, for many years despite my very abnormal relationship with food.  But, as with most addictions, it caught up.  Food became an addiction and the weight piled on.  At my heaviest I weighed 90 pounds more than I do today.  Some of that I regained after losing it in a royally unhealthy manner.  I had lost the weight, but not dealt with the emotional component behind, it so of course it was going to come back. 

“The Inspired Eater”/ Wendy helped me to really start digging into the emotions behind it.  In the last 1 1/2 years I have lost over 30 pounds.  No more going to the grocery store hungry.  No more drive thru meals.  None of my addictive foods are in my home (for me it is all things sugar and creamy).   I used to take advantage of time alone to finally get to eat all the food I wanted with no one around and would head to the store or fast food immediately.  No more.  I used to use food shopping trips to sneak in my favorite binge foods.  No more.  I feel my feelings instead of feeding them and numbing out.

I’ve also found a new tool to help me. I’ve learned to treat food, which is an addiction for me, just like recovering alcoholics treat drinking.   “One day at a time”.  For today I will be “sober.” Here’s how that looks for me: I want cake and frosting.  I really want it.  Okay, but it will lead to more sugar and more eating and I have been doing well.  However, for TODAY I am choosing not to get/eat it.  If I want it tomorrow, I will deal with it then.  But for today, I am saying no. Now, if a certain craving appears multiple days in a row and I fear it is turning into a food obsession,  I choose a small amount, have it early in the day, and make sure that my typical healthy meal follows it. 

Approaching food addiction like alcoholism is making a difference—again, always combined with the incredible advice/ideas/support that Wendy provides.  It is a multi-pronged approach for sure.  

There is no describing the wonderful feeling of being able to look in my closet and knowing all my clothes fit. That I can feel good about going out in public instead of wanting to hide because of shame due to my size. 

I once saw a saying that said “what you eat in private, you wear in public”.  Ouch, that truth-bomb hits close to home.  So in my ever-filling tool bag of eating helps, “one day at a time” is added,  and I am happy to have it.

Pearl Three

We have just ten weeks to our Holiday Healthy Weight Challenge!

If you’re doing the Holiday Healthy Weight Challenge — and if you’re not on board, join us — we have ten weeks to bring our goal to life. When you have a sec, visualize exactly what you’d like to accomplish by the U.S. Thanksgiving. (My goal involves getting sweaty for 30 minutes a day. One sweet reader said, “please share how you did it.” Well, B, as soon as I know, I’ll share it!)

And of course, journal, journal, journal about your goal, why it matters to you, what you expect the difficulties will be, how to address those difficulties and how you can re-motivate yourself each week. We can do this!

Pearl Four

Anyone alive at this moment in history – whether losing after 50 or not – needs to eat more fruit and veggies.

And with today’s wacky economy, I want to share the latest news on finding exceptional produce at a low price. For safety reasons, let’s call the upper crust food store Splatts. It’s my husband who likes to peruse the very expensive calories in our Splatts. I rarely go into mine and when I do, I never buy anything.

But I just read some interesting news: apparently it’s common knowledge among the frugal that Splatts is home to incredible produce prices.

The guy who writes the blog, Eat Like No One Else, says what all of my Googling said, “The number one reason to go to (Slatt’s) is the produce. A stop in the produce department is a must for all the incredible buys. I got some amazing deals on some quality produce (asparagus for .88/lb, broccoli crowns for .98/lb, Brussels sprouts for $1.99/lb.).”

Of course, inexpensive produce only works as long as you don’t cave and buy the pricey items. My very best suggestion: before entering Splatts eat something that will hold you (this goes for every food store); then set the timer on your phone to go off at the ten or fifteen minute mark; now proceed into the Land of the Dragons. Head straight for the produce section, pay, and get the heck out of the lair!

Pearl Five

Life will only change when you become more committed to your dreams than you are to your comfort zone.” – Billy Cox

Have a beautiful weekend full of visualizations!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

I’ve been asked if I could include something like Buy me a Coffee on the Inspired Eater. So if you feel up to sending a coffee, I am a devotee. You’ll find the coffee “button” to your right. And, as always, thank you so much for reading the Inspired Eater. ♥♥♥

Pearl Three: shhh! Don’t awaken the cave woman. Photo by Raphael Lovaski on Unsplash

Pearl One

Forty-two years ago, the Tahoe slope that morning was practically empty. I’d skied a bit further ahead of my (first ever) boyfriend, so I stopped to wait for Mike (names have been changed to protect the skinny). While waiting, two guys on a chair lift hooted and hollered in my direction.

Pleased, I thought, wow I must look pretty cool. After lunch Mike and I were on the chairlift with the same guys two empty seats back. One said quite clearly, “Oh. She’s big.”

I was mortified, because one, I was a teenager so of course and two, my new boyfriend was in earshot. I hoped Mike hadn’t heard.

Mike heard.

And that ski-memory pretty much sums up the first thirty-five years of life. My younger sister? Boy magnet. I was Roseanne to her sister Jackie. Alice to Mrs. Brady. Fred to Lucy Ricardo.

Some would say “oh, cry me a river” there are real tragedies unfolding across the globe. Okay, but here’s the thing: these days, our culture would never tell a smoker, an alcoholic, or someone addicted to drugs to stop whining and get on with it.

But they tell heavy people just this daily. We don’t stop to think that overeating is a sibling to the other addictions and just as dangerous.

For example, we understand that anorexia or bulimia can result in death, but we largely ignore the reality that too much weight can lead to a higher risk of  heart disease, stroke, diabetes and certain cancers among other diseases (hsph.harvard.edu).

My Point

It’s vital that you and I take wanting to lose weight seriously.

  • No more apologizing for eating differently than everyone else.
  • No more minimizing that we, in fact, are super serious about our health. 
  • No more politely eating something when we actually wanted to say, “no thank you.”

At first we might think that we’re losing weight for vanity purposes only. (Maybe you want to look great at your high school reunion.)

But dig deeper and you’ll find that something inside of us knows that too much weight — just like cigarettes, drink and drugs — can be a precursor to serious (and sometimes fatal) health problems.

What the “cry me a river” crowd doesn’t get is that what you and I are steadily pursuing and protecting — our smart eating lifestyle — is just as significant an endeavor as extinguishing any other addiction. I’m sorry, but I’m not going to say “I’m sorry” anymore.

Pearl Two

Have you ever noticed that high calorie, high fat food is often soft, easy to eat, and disappears in a flash?

Because I sure have.

Take the world of cream filled cupcakes. They’re so soft, I could wad up the cakes into a little chocolate ball in ten seconds flat.

In fact, I think my waded ball invention applies to all snack cake products both “chocolate” and “golden cream” filled cakes along with those pink coconut breast-like looking things.

All wad-able.

And our culture is packed in wad-able items: birthday cake, brownies, pancakes and waffles, donuts. You get the idea.

Admittedly ice cream, crunchy cookies, and sticky pies would be tough to wad. Ice cream is cold, cookies crumble, but I think with perseverance I could wad up a pie slice in ten seconds too.

The foods our bodies really need aren’t wad-able and can take forever to eat like salads, large crunchy sandwiches, smoothies, all fruits, all veggies, and most food items that come in the “whole wheat” flavor.

My point? Go forth and wad up those “snacks”and practice slam dunking them into the trash can. And when you wonder whether a food is healthy or not, give it the wad-able test and you’re good to go!

Pearl Three

Pearl Three is our slot to talk about the Holiday Healthy Weight Challenge. We have 11 weeks until Thanksgiving.

I won’t win any popularity contests for saying this, but losing two pounds a week – the number that’s long been touted – is much too fast. We have 11 weeks to Thanksgiving. If you goal yourself to lose one pound a week, you’re doing a spectacular job. (Any faster and it just piles back on.)

Always remember that losing too fast wakes up the cave woman in our brain who assumes that we’re starving. Which is why most can’t maintain longer than two or three years. You’ve heard “the body’s set-point” theory? Well, I don’t happen to agree with the idea that our bodies will always want to return to a “set-point.” I think that what the researchers are actually seeing are people who lose weight quickly thereby waking up the cave woman who proceeds to take them back to “the set-point.”

To lose and maintain, we need to take off the weight nice and slowly to avoid triggering the cave woman.

So, 11 pounds in 11 weeks. That’s a bit faster than I’d recommend.  Lose and maintain. Lose and maintain. Lose and maintain. I honestly think that’s why I’ve had success in maintaining my loss: I went super slowly in the first place.

Pearl Four

Our food slot. There was a time when hard boiled eggs weren’t on my radar except at Easter, but I’ve rediscovered what a great “food-tool” these babies can be.

On Sundays I make five to six hard boiled eggs with a goal of eating one a day (give or take). I mash one egg with pickle relish, a tiny bit of ranch dressing, and a very light sprinkle of salt and spread over toast.

The best part about boiling and bagging five or six eggs on a Sunday means that I’ll have an easy-to-grab smart food that I can toss into my cold-tote in a flash.

Pearl Five

Don’t give up on the person you are becoming. Stay focused and give it all that you’ve got.” — Anonymous

“Give it all that you’ve got.” I love these six words for any and every endeavor. I’m keeping them on my screensaver to motivate me daily.

Hope you’re headed towards a beautiful veggie and fruit filled weekend!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I am an Amazon affiliate so if you buy something through a link at this site, I may receive a small commission that won’t impact your price at all.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

Hello Thrivers!

August has me doing the annual doctors: pap, mammogram, shingles vaccines. (We had two vibrant young women in our extended family die of cancer. Just 38 and 43. So I try to remind myself how incredibly lucky I am to be annoyed by visiting the doctors.)

These pearls are good, I hope you agree.

Pearl One

Crazy week, but in its own way exceptional too.

Take a look.

Before I begin: I swear I was not in demanding princess-mode.

Long story, short: I needed a head-shot – in my life, photos were shot at home, nothing fancy – so I set an appointment with an experienced photographer who’d (according to his gorgeous website) been shooting head-shots for many years.

A million things went wrong that day – some me, some not me — but everything was made worse by the make-up artist’s work. The photographer was insistent that I have my professional make up done. (He comes from the actors’ world and seems to assume regular people can’t do makeup for photos.)

Anyhoo, one makeup artist later and I’d bloomed into full clown. My super supportive son got up off the couch – we were at the photographer’s studio — took one look at my face and quietly sat back down. At that I went to the bathroom’s mirror and omg.

It was bad. I mean bad/bad. I was all eyebrows.

Two gigantic caterpillars sitting on my face.

I wiped off as much as I could. I asked the make-up person to at least take off the fake eyelashes which she did. (Right before she bolted.)

And then we started the shoot. The photographer didn’t do one thing to help my mood. There was no music, nothing funny to laugh at, no beautiful photo on the wall, just nothing. And yet he kept clicking the camera. I tried to think of something funny, but by the time I’d thought of something to make myself laugh, he’d already taken three or four more shots. So the photos were of stressed out me, with Halloween-like make-up.  

All to say, I’m buying a ring light and taking selfies from now on. (Adding: I’ve known professional photographers who are awesome. My entire situation was a one-off.)

But here’s the thing: At the photographer’s studio, I realized that the photo was a fail. (I haven’t told you the whole boring story. The make-up artist was one hacking cough amid a million hiccups that day.)

Riding down the elevator my “looking-for-the-lesson” habit – one that I’d practiced over the last two decades – kicked in with no prodding from me.

Driving home, I turned the entire situation over in my mind, looking at every facet. I wanted to figure out the parts of which I had control. I began asking myself, Exactly what happened here? How can I do it better next time? What did I miss? How was I snookered? Had I been overeager with his beautiful website? (Yes.) When he wasn’t communicating with me at all prior to the shoot, did I allow the little red flags alert me to a potential problem? (No.)

I backed the timeline up. I kept asking myself over and over: what could I have done differently? How could I have influenced the experience for a successful outcome? What can I learn?

I didn’t ask myself these questions in a mean or cruel way. And I absolutely wasn’t trying to find the person to hang the blame on. I only wanted to learn from the situation.

I was smack in the middle of a massive failure, and I was doing a deep-dive trying to assess what role I’d played in this little drama.

We all fail here and there. In big and small ways. It’s how we respond to the so-called fail. Realizing that the head shot was in free-fall, I wanted to get something out of this situation. No, I wouldn’t have an amazing photo, but I would become a better version of myself if I had anything to say about it.

I continued with the questions: How could I have made this better from the get-go? Why did I ignore the meadow of tiny red flags?

And the gems spilled forth.

I’m not kidding, I learned so much about how I engage with the world. I didn’t only learn lessons for an (unlikely) photo shoot to come, but I did learn lessons that I could apply to my daily life right now.

I continued with the questions like how do I handle being assertive? How am I making myself insignificant while making the photographer and make-up artist too important?

The Art of Recovering from an Overeat

So, back to our topic. You attacked the kitchen and ate the leftover cheesecake? And then the box of Ding Dongs?

And last week you went out with a friend and ate half the pizza and downed two beers? And had ice cream when you got home? And everything went south from there?

Honestly, this is how I would proceed. First I’d tell myself to chill; that I was in failure-recovery mode and something awesome would come out of this.

I’d remind myself that the best lessons can come from any situation but especially the fails. Then I’d pull out my journal and answer these questions:

  • An overview: what has happened over the last week for me? The last month?
  • What has me so worried? So scared? So mad? So very sad?  (If you’re feeling like, drrr, my best friend had a heart attack. Okay, then write about the worry and how the worry is affecting you.)
  • Still asking yourself: At what point, did I stop “having my own back?”
  • What does “having my own back even mean to me (in various situations)?”
  • What was going on in my life before I stepped off the smart eating path and lunged for the cheesecake?
  • How do I interrupt overeating?
  • What happened in my day, my week, my month that led me to the calories?
  • What red flags did I miss before I Cookie Monster’d the kitchen?
  • How do I support myself when I’m having the aforementioned feelings?

I’ll tell you something funny: as a travel writer I often embraced it when part of the trip fell off the cliff. It gave me something interesting to write about.

Same here. “Failures” are awesome because it gives us new info into who we are and how we can evolve into better versions of ourselves.

The next time everything tanks start looking at the many facets of the “fail.” What is the “fail” trying to tell you?

This “fail” could be just one of many diamonds that transforms your life.

Pearl Two

As I’ve mentioned, the diet-industry has sold us on the idea that “losing ten is easy.” That said, I’ve also noticed how prevalent the word “easy” is in our world.

You could make an argument that life can be brutal, and learning or doing something easily would be a welcome diversion.

I get it, but. . . things that really matter aren’t easy. Nothing about raising kids – or a puppy!! – is easy, but they’re the most precious creatures on earth to us.

Very little about travel is easy, but our treks matter so very much to us. And we love sharing our trip memories later.

Losing weight especially after menopause? Nothing easy about it.

We always need to remind ourselves: it’s hard, apparently it’s supposed to be hard, but we can do hard things.

We’re totally up for the challenge.

Pearl Three

In August, Pearl Three is about habit formation and today, specifically: my habit of “forgetting.”

“Forgetting” is one of my most favorite excuses when I’m dorking around, and not getting down to business.

Say I skip a workout, I automatically assuage my guilt by thinking, “Well, I just forgot.” Nifty. Forgetting has gotten me out of all kinds of stuff I didn’t feel like doing such as going to the bank, cleaning the bathroom, writing a chapter.

Of course, I calendar everything like doctor appointments; an article’s due date; or the next kayaking get-together.

So then the question becomes: do I just need to better calendar my personal goals?

I have a bike ride plan with a group later in August and I need to do 20 minutes a day on my inside-bike. I’m afraid that writing “biking” into my calendar will cause me to “forget” to read my calendar.

But this is the moment to create teeny-weenie habit-cues for myself according to James Clear in his amazing book, Atomic Habits.

My cues for riding indoors: cute workout clothes laid out on bed and leave phone on bed too (so I can watch a show while I ride).

Keep notes on the length of the ride, the difficulty levels, and improvement I’m making. (Tracking is huge to embedding a habit.)

But next time I “just forget?” I’ll tell myself, no ma’am that is a cop-out. These days my “I forgot” is my cue to sit down and journal about my “why.” Why do I want to ride my indoor bike? Why is it so important to me? And then time to revisit the calendar to put my “why” into action.

Pearl Four

Food!* Yes, I know. We’re nowhere near the holidays and I’m writing about sweet potatoes. But hang with me, this will make sense in a moment.

Did you know that you can nuke one sweet potato and get four grams of fiber, 0.5 grams of fat, and billions of vitamins? (That is, unless you have kidney troubles, then steer clear, but you likely already knew that.)

It’s a fun tiny meal — because it’s somewhat sweet — and makes one feel virtuous all at the same time (as in, make sure to eat the sweet potato in front of others so you can quietly humble-gloat about how cool your food choices are. Win-win!!)

Here’s the easy how-to:

Wash one sweet potato.

Stick it with a knife or fork four times (to allow steam to escape).

Put on plate, plunk in microwave.

Nuke for 2.5 minutes. Turn, then nuke another 2.5 minutes.

Cut it open. Drop three to six mini-marshmallows on top.

Nuke for ten seconds.

Eat it like you would a baked potato or mash it.

Very-yum.

*Always keep in mind that I’m not a doctor, I’m a lost-55-pounder. I’m sharing how I eat and think on a daily basis. If you don’t like your GP, shop around. You are that important. Talk with her about your health.

Pearl Five

When it hurts: observe. Life is trying to teach you something.” — Anita Krizzan

Have a wonderful August weekend, Thrivers!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I am an Amazon affiliate so if you buy something through a link at this site, I may receive a small commission that won’t impact your price at all.

When you embed a new habit into your heart you’re becoming a new version of you.

Pearl One

Back when yo-yo-ing was my lifestyle, I would never have called myself “smug.” Most of the time, I was dealing with too little confidence, rather than too much.

But.

To be perfectly transparent, I remember losing ten or fifteen pounds, and turning moderately smug. As if I were too cool for school. As in, I’d never have to deal with weight issues again! (Awesome, right?)

And – in my opinion – feeling smug is the very precursor to the downhill slide into re-gaining the fifteen + more.

Like all of us trying to lose weight, I was on an elevator that went up and down through the years.

And back then I didn’t know that what I put into my mind and heart was far more important than what I put into my mouth. I didn’t know that being smug would never be a helpful thought or feeling. It would always be the beginning of a downfall.

Thankfully I figured out trashing the smug thought was vital, and instead think, I’m always learning. I’m always discovering. I slip and that’s okay. I’ll just meet the new day and go for it again. Over and over and over.

I know that a lot of Thrivers are having amazing success. And don’t get me wrong, I love hearing about the awesome strides everyone’s making, but consider nestling this phrase into your heart forever.

I’m not smug about losing.

I’m not smug about losing.

I’m not smug about losing.

If you’re having what anyone would deem “victory!!,” don’t be lured down the smug-pathway. It might seem like allowing ourselves to feel a tiny bit smug is the pinnacle of “success”, but it’s really the precursor to a downward spiral back into overeating-land.

I’m not smug about losing. Let’s don’t me smug together.

Pearl Two

Welcome to the Holiday Healthy Weight Challenge! If you’re not yet on-board, please join us!! This is my first year for a holiday challenge. This will be fun.

We currently have 12 weeks and 5 days before Thanksgiving (U.S.). If you live somewhere else on our beautiful, blue marble, jump in and play along anyway. For example, Canada’s Thanksgiving is in six weeks and six days on October 10. I’m inviting all of our planet’s countries like Switzerland, England and Australia: you guys come along too! Fyi: the U.S. Thanksgiving is on 11-24-22.

Thirteen weeks and five days is a perfect amount of time to focus on Thanksgiving-you.

The Best Therapy Available

I’ll never stop saying that I’m a huge believer in journaling. I’ve mentioned that in a lifetime long, long ago I was a private practice therapist. I absolutely revere cognitive-behavioral therapy, but writing about our issues produces tangible gems too. It’s inexpensive, and I think, tends to be considered “second- or third-rate.”

Don’t be fooled by the simplicity of journaling, it’s the real-deal.

If your hand gets tired of writing jump onto the laptop. (I love typing out my thoughts, but journaling experts often say that handwriting is better.)

For those on the Healthy Weight Challenge, let’s go! Write about the following:

When you wake up on Thanksgiving morning, how would you like to feel about your health, your weight, your fitness and so forth? List at least three ways you’d love for Thanksgiving-you to feel on the big day.

What habits did late August- and September-you do for Thanksgiving-you? How did she create a successful month for her later self? Be super specific like: I want to habitually “eat before I eat” so that I never again face a table full of gorgeous food when I’m ravenous. My days of being way too hungry are over!

What is most important to you about losing weight? (Look gorgeous for a new job? Drop your BMI score? Get off certain meds?)

What do you wish were more important to you? (You might write, I wish I cared more about working out, not eating after 6 pm, or eliminating evening-eating all-together.)

Keeping it positive, tell yourself: I deeply care about working out, I deeply care about not eating after 6, and I deeply care about how I’ll feel on January 1. Don’t say, I wish. Say, I do. (Seems like a small distinction but it’s huge.)

A challenge. Consider taking on this new thought for the next seven days: I’m shifting into a new me in fall 2022. (Be specific.) I will be eating a small salad for dinner, or eating like“Elaine” for lunch (Elaine on Seinfeld would ask the waitress to combine two small salads to make one large salad), or I’m giving up evening sugar.

Our new thought about a “new me in the fall 2022” will be a habit in it’s infancy. Be gentle with the new activity that you’re shaping into a habit. Don’t tell it that it’s annoying or anything like that. Treat the beginning of a new habit like a newborn for the week to come.

In my case, I’m working on my fitness. So, I’d write: I’m shifting into a new me in the fall 2022. I will write very specifically about how I will start the process of daily movement involving sweat. Let me know if you want the particulars.

Let’s challenge ourselves with small habits to reap huge rewards by November 24!

Pearl Three

We’ve set August aside to talk about habits in Pearl Three. Because my posts are already too long (sorry), I’ll just say this.

Throughout the last many years, I began to slowly notice how ideas for – in our case – smart eating can be found almost anywhere. The “Elaine” salad from Seinfeld is the perfect example.

I find new nuggets, suggestions and aha moments when I speak with friends, listen to a podcast, or even glance in a fellow shopper’s grocery cart. Lol. I did exactly that when I watched a woman – who looked to be in her 40s and in great shape — in Costco toss two large bags of a salad kit into her cart. So I immediately said, “Those must be really good.” And she proceeded to tell me how to prep the kale salad kit for the most nutrition minus the excess calories and fat.

We can learn new pieces of information almost anywhere if we stay open to the incoming intell.

Where have you learned helpful ideas? And what was the tip? We’d all love to know!!

Pearl Four

Food! Let’s say that you (really me) created a not so great ice cream habit for yourself. At this stage of the smart eating game, I weaned off the ice cream habit due to my braces relatively easily. In retrospect, I simply didn’t give the ice cream habit time to truly sink in.

Today I can go straight from ice cream to (a better choice) smoothies: almond milk, frozen banana, frozen blueberries, ¼ cup vanilla yogurt. Tasty.

But back in the day, that would have been a total joke: I would never have accepted a smoothie in place of ice cream.

Here’s the plan that would have worked for me:

To start, somebody would’ve had to explain to me that the ultimate goal was getting off the hard stuff for good (which would have made me frown and think, why would I have to give up ice cream for good?)

Heavy sigh. (You see what I was working with?)

Next I’d recommend beginning by substituting sorbet for ice cream. Not for a week or two, but for the amount of time it takes to create a sorbet habit instead of an ice cream habit. I’d also begin “backing up the clock” meaning that if I once chowed my ice cream at 10 pm, I’d move my sorbet habit to 9 pm. And I’d go to bed early with a book.

Then I’d swap smoothies out for sorbet. And again, I’d have a smoothie every evening for not weeks, but months. I’d also back up the clock again. So I’d have my smoothie now at 8 pm. Again, I’d go to bed early with a book.

Finally if I still wasn’t ready to give up having an evening dessert, I would substitute in a handful of baby marshmallows, a little dark chocolate and two or three nuts. (This actually was my dessert for quite awhile until I gave up eating in the evening all together.)

You could use this exact strategy with chips, cake, candy, cookies, chocolate. Name your addiction and you absolutely can slowly wean yourself off.

Pearl Five

Success is all about going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill

I’m spending the weekend bagging up still-in-great-shape clutter, and taking the bags to my local animal-rescue thrift store. I know I’ve mentioned this, but giving away treasure is so much easier when I know the items will help those I care so much about (the fur-people).

I hope you have a weekend filled with good sleep, sweet animals, and plenty of “fuel-food.”

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I am an Amazon affiliate so if you buy something through a link at this site, I may receive a small commission that won’t impact your price at all.

Hello everyone!

If sugar is on your last nerve, read on!

Pearl One

Craving treats in the evening plagued me for years. I’d tried everything I could think of to end the cookies, candy, cake, ice cream routine, but nothing worked. Once I even talked my husband into keeping his treats in a locked safe. I can’t remember how long that so-called “solution” worked, but it was probably one day, tops.

Back in January 2021 I decided I’d had enough. I thought, I will extinguish my evening sugar habit once and for all.

And after a lifetime of getting nowhere, I finally hit on my own hack that wiped sugar off my map. At this writing I haven’t had sugary treats in the evenings for three years. The plan works beautifully. And it now belongs to you.

The Stop the Evening Sugar Plan

For the first week or so of early January, I’d spend each morning writing about the steps I would take that evening to defeat my sugar-urge. The first two weeks were the hardest.

My planning notes looked like this.

When the dessert-hour rolls around and I’m craving Oreos and ice cream – not to mention watching my husband, the Scarfer, chowing down –, I agree to do the following:

  • Step One — Get out of the kitchen and away from the ice cream scarfer. I will listen to an inspirational podcast and wait for the craving to quiet down (btw, cravings are like clouds. They subside if you wait them out).
  • Step Two — Listen to hard rock from the 70s. (Not sure why, but great music stops my cravings.)
  • Step Three –Take a hot shower.
  • Step Four — Brush teeth and read in bed. (I call it book-dessert.)
  • Step Six — Turn on the electric blanket and go to sleep.

Within two weeks my sugar cravings seriously calmed down.

By Day 66: the new habit was solidly mine. Today if I want something fun – like birthday cake – I have it with my morning coffee. More about the advantages of brownies for breakfast here.

Now You

In the morning, long before the cravings start make a “step list” for yourself to navigate evening cravings. Write down the moment you start thinking about eating the treats. Is it immediately after dinner? Or more like 9 p.m. when you’re watching Hulu? Or is it after everyone goes to bed and you have time to yourself?

Write up a plan that focuses on precisely what you commit to doing when the urge hits. Let’s say you know that you want a large bowl of ice cream every evening at 9. Plan to get out of the environment that’s connected with ice cream: the couch, Hulu, your scarfing partner.

Just like Pavlov’s dogs, our brain has connected relaxing evenings to ice cream.

So write up a plan that specifically – very specifically to your life – takes you step-by-step through the hardest time of day when the sugar urge hits and detail how you’ll handle it (listen to light jazz? Take a bath? Get into bed and call it a day?).

Let your partner know, “Hey, I just want to give you the heads up, but I won’t be watching Hulu tonight. And it would really help if you wouldn’t eat ice cream around me for the next two weeks.”

As I snuffed out my evening sugar habit, I didn’t just pick one step from my list.

No. I completed all six steps that first week.

Within two weeks my sugar cravings had somewhat calmed down.

By Day 66 (the time my favorite study says it takes to create a habit): the new habit was mine. Today if I want something fun – like birthday cake – I have it in the morning with my coffee. Read more in Brownies for Breakfast.

Make a “step list” for yourself to navigate your cravings.  

Don’t come up with a one-step plan. You need at least five or six ideas to essentially remind yourself about what really matters to you. (And if you’re reading this, I doubt it’s ice cream.)

Tracking your experience is key. These lines are from January 2021 when I wrote down one line about how I was developing my no-sugar habit:

Day One – 1-2-21. Had cake last night for “dinner.” It was my way of saying good-bye to sugar. It needed a funeral.

Day Two – 1-3-21. I did it! The whole plan: I went to bed early with my book. No sugar!

Day Three – 1-4-21. Another success. Going to sleep earlier has helped in so many ways. No sugar.

Day Eight — 1-12-21. Day 10 — Still no dessert!!

And there you have it.

Let me know what habit you’re extinguishing – or bringing to life — using this step-by-step method.

Pearl Two

If anybody thinks that I eat perfectly day in and day out, please allow me to disavow you of this notion.

While it’s true that my plan is to keep my weight within a four pound window, I still have moments when I step off the smart eating path.

So, when my weight heads in the wrong direction, do I beat myself up for whatever I ate or overate? No, not even a little. I see it this way: if being mean to ourselves worked you and I would be a size 4.

Instead I’ve retrained my brain to use supportive self-talk. Learning to talk kindly to yourself is practically a superpower.

So there I was a pound over my “high” weight.

Here’s what I tell myself when I need to strengthen my smart eating habits:

Me: Oh, hell no!! (This one’s my favorite. Oh, hell no! means that there’s no way that I’m returning to my prior weight that included health problems and so forth.)

Me again: Not on my watch!

Still me: “Smart habits first and the weight loss will follow.” (Just thinking about habits reminds me that, if I’m gaining one of my habits is slipping.)

Final me: I decide the number on my pant-size not the Superbowl party, the chocolate Easter eggs, or even pizza by the pool come summer.

Please use my, oh, hell no! Three little words that have played a huge role in helping me keep off 55 lbs.

Pearl Three

I keep this space to write about Thinking Big. I’ll always be in love with the very idea of Thinking Big because it pushes me to go for the gusto when planning my life. OF course it’s true that there’s much we don’t have control over, but it’s also exciting to know that we have control over a lot.

Thinking Big can be as small as, I will read every book my favorite author has written to something huge like, I will author and publish a book. Big-small: I will take that acting class I’ve long thought about. Big-huge: I will be in a movie within the next five years. Big-small: I’ll seriously spruce up my French. Big-huge: I will live in France for at least a year.

I’d love to hear: what are your thinking big plans?

Pearl Four

Over the last month, when it was time for an afternoon snack or light dinner I’d open my fridge’s salad drawer, and come up empty in the leafy greens department. I had a realization. “Real” salad doesn’t have to be lettuce based.

Right?

Right. Given my aha moment I pulled out my trusty cucumber and sliced off ten cucumber coins. I placed a handful of petite carrots and cherry tomatoes on the plate next to the cucumbers and finally drizzled all with one teaspoon of olive oil and a added a small blob of ranch dressing. I lightly dip the veggies into the dressing for a smidgen of extra flavor.

Share your coolest aha moments. Learning from each other is a brilliant way to raise our smart-eating game.

Pearl Five

“Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.” – Bruce Lee

Join me in making it a beautiful week!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I’m an Amazon affiliate. If you buy from a link in my post, I’ll receive money, but the arrangement won’t cost you a dime.

I am not an expert, a doctor, a surgeon, a nurse or a nutritionist: the information within TheInspiredEater.com is based solely on my personal experience and is not intended to be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

My favorite cold tote-bag to carry smart snacks.

My five-star book list.

It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s my Trader Joe’s ensemble! Hey, it’s TJs or the library. Maybe the post office.

If you too require a shopping-gown, these Pearls are for you.

Happy Friday, Thrivers!

I am hearing from so many Thrivers that you’re scoring amazing results! Music to my ears.

On tough weeks especially — but always — your comments are a breath of fresh air. Thank you.

And thank you for reading The Inspired Eater!

I love these Pearls, I hope they speak to you too.

Pearl One

At this point I’m pretty lame, but I’m determined to become a person who takes extreme ownership of her life as detailed in retired Navy Seal “Jocko” Willink’s book of the same name.

There’s a reason I need to re-read Extreme Ownership on the regular. I’ve long had a scene play out in my head that one day I’ll be “discovered” in an ice cream shop just like actresses of old (no, I don’t act).

I know I’m not alone in harboring this eternal flame of hope. Who hasn’t wanted a quick uplevel to their life? We’d all love an overnight fix for our weight and overeating situation. I mean, we’re busy: we have high school reunions, upcoming beach trips, big job promotions on the horizon. Losing weight takes time. A genie with three magic wishes would be far more efficient.

But then one year I realized, I needed to give the genie or magic pill myth the heave-ho. Because at least for now, there isn’t a quick solution to losing and maintaining after 50. Maybe in the future an Elonaia Musk will invent a genie in a bottle, but for today it’s all up to us.

I Gave Myself a Good Talking To

This is what I told myself about letting go of the dream of being discovered in a malt shop. To me I said, let’s say we want color done by our stylist. The woman we’ve used for years wouldn’t “discover” us eating ice cream in a shop, run up and say, “I hate to interrupt, but I just know that I can give you the best highlights of your life. Here’s my number. Please call. Let’s talk further.”

Nobody will bust down our door and announce, “You’ve won a trip for two – everything included – to Italy for a month! All arrangements handled.”

No.

You and I both know the time consuming — sometimes exasperating — work involved in setting up flights, hotels, tours and the like.

A genie or a magic pill isn’t coming to our rescue. If we want to be lean after 50 – and this goes for the maintainers too – it’s paramount that we shift our mindset from flirting with the genie in a bottle/magic pill fantasy to one of being fully in charge and striving towards an extreme ownership lifestyle.

Easy? No. Doable? With the right mind shifts? Absolutely.

Pearl Two

(Deep breath.) You’re the first to know. I’m writing a book. Guess how many books I’ve written? Zero.

But here’s what I’ve learned: you and I are smart. We may have gone through more challenges in life than seems fair. But we’re still standing. We’re still in the game.

You and I can figure out difficult things. We can ask Google questions, find a Facebook page on our topic filled with knowledgeable people, and find websites galore of people who want to help, and are further along the path than we are.

I’ve felt overwhelmed as I create this book, but I remind myself how powerful self-talk can be. So now I’m telling myself, it’s just like putting together a puzzle. One piece at a time. Start at “a” go to “b.”

Now, clearly we can’t learn German by Googling, but we can Google to find the best German school or tutor in our area. We might even find a podcast that teaches German or a neighbor who grew up in Germany willing to have coffee with us once a month (locate on Next Door).

Okay, here’s the working title. Travel Weight: Prepare for Take Off!

By Christmas I’ll be at “z.”

I’d love to hear about your challenge — and how you’re puzzle-piecing it together today.

Pearl Three

Our July topic is habits: how to develop an amazing habit, how to dump an annoying one.

Today let’s look at eliminating triggers. This topic is huge for me. I dealt with so many triggers as I lost, and plenty still today.

Friends and family can be our trigger. I ate huge entertainment-meals with certain friends and one in particular. In fact it started to feel weird when she’d order a full meal while I had a small bowl of veggies. Awkward.

Routines can trigger us. Early on Saturday mornings, we run our shepherd at the dog park. One time – one time – we stopped at a fancy bakery, and The Scarfer was nice enough to bring an éclair for me back to the car. Isn’t that sweet? Yeah, every Saturday since my mind thinks automatically about the éclair. That’s how fast negative habits can be established.

Scary.

Of course we’ve long known that days of the week, time of day, a particular holiday — or all of the holidays — can trigger us.

Even roads or certain parts of town can trigger. I drive down this road and I think ice cream. That road and it’s a burrito at Taco Bell.

If we’re being triggered – and all beings get triggered, dogs practically invented the trigger – our work becomes changing the cue. Don’t drive down those roads, consider what your friendships can (and can’t) tolerate, take another route to the dog park.

And if you don’t know your triggers and cues? Journal, journal, and journal. Because — no joke — your mind knows everything about you. Your job is to get it down on paper.

Pearl Four

Our food talk section. I rate this veggie combo roasted in the oven with five-thumbs up!!

First

Set your oven for 400 degrees.

Then

Cut into bites:

Three or four small red potatoes. (Or eight or nine, whatever you think.)

Do the same with broccoli.

Again with a handful of petite carrots.

And a bell pepper.

Mix

Put the veggie bites in a large mixing bowl.

  • Add a tsp. (or more) of good olive oil.
  • Finally sprinkle with salt and pepper.
  • With a big spoon, mix and mix and mix the veggies.
  • Then pour the veggies onto a cookie sheet covered in foil.
  • Roast for 20 minutes. When you pull the veggies out, taste one to see if it’s roasted enough for you.

One time, I over roasted. The veggies were still delish, but I’ve read that over cooking veggies can rob them of nutrition.

After some research I also learned that covering the veggies gives us a steamed veggie, but leaving them uncovered in the oven gives them time to roast creating a caramelizing effect. Tasty.

I eat a bowl of roasted veggies at 6 p.m. as my tiny dinner, but add brown rice and a protein and you have one heck of a meal.

Let me know what you think!

Pearl Five

In a wide variety of human activity, achievement is not possible without discomfort.” – Alex Hutchinson

Have a wonderful mid-July! And let’s get sweaty this weekend. I’m planning some great walks.

♥, Wendy

Pearl Two talks about the best way I know to bring more nurturing into our creative lives.

Welcome to Friday, Thrivers!

If you’re new to living a thriving lifestyle, how about trying it for just one weekend? Say, this weekend?! Begin by journal-writing about what thriving means to you.

In my life, thriving means always on the look-out for ways to take baby steps toward goals that matter to me.

Away we go with our Pearls!

Pearl One

It was 2009 and my husband had anxiety about keeping his job in the ‘08 downturn. We lived in California (pricey), had five-year-old twins (insanely pricey), and were living on the edge financially (what my husband called bleeding money). His company wasn’t paying him market value – which was okay because he wanted the work experience – and was trimming staff.

So when he landed a job in Virginia, we were both stoked. Technically, I was “supposed” to be sad along with my California brethren, but I wasn’t. I was aching to live in a different part of the world and see new sights. And my hub was aching for a better salary.

When a ginormous moving van pulled up to our house in early 2010, we were both elated.

My happy-to-move story is a perfect example of “circumstances” (the downturn) not determining my mental state. I saw needing to get out of Dodge as a positive, not a negative.

In our current recession we can also choose our thoughts about the economy.

Join me in making this not-so-good economy work for us rather than against.

Do you remember during the first several months of the COVID-19 lock down, it was fashionable to let our hair go grey and gain a few? Well, just like then, let’s instead get something wonderful out of this downturn.

Is Fast Food Actually “Food?”

I get that a drive-thru is a fast experience, but one wonders if it serves up actual food? Okay, one doesn’t really wonder. One knows the fast food joints aren’t serving real food (that should be called fast-porn-food). We can debate the point, but I’d likely win.

The truth about our current economic situation means that most of us need to allocate our money differently.

Let’s start by not spending money on fast food drive-thrus (like DQ, Starbucks, McDumb and the like). The companies are charging a small fortune for items, so in a sense we’re paying in two ways:

One: We pay by giving the junk food industry our hard earned for questionable “food.”

And two: We pay later by further embedding a bad habit into our being, rather than strengthening a good one.

Our battle cry: this is our moment in time to develop a no junk food rule; no drive-thrus, no grocery store junk in our carts, and no ginormous restaurant food plates.

Let’s emerge from this not-so-fun economic time with strong habits and a better relationship with food.  

Let’s show them what we’re made of!

Pearl Two

How often do we read an incredible book and remember it’s main tenants decades later? Well, that’s exactly what happened to me. I read Julia Cameron’s bestseller, The Artists Way, a couple of lifetimes back, and I still remember her invention – so to speak – of “morning pages.”

Let me go a step further and say: not only do I remember morning pages, but I continue to write them several times a week. Thrivers, this method has taken me from glum to mellow-yellow on so many days . The best moment for morning pages that I’ve found is when I’m upset at my husband. I want to hash out whatever is bothering me, but he’s either not around or still won’t get what I’m saying anyhow.

That’s when I put it all down on paper.

The essence of morning pages is this: write three pages by hand (I’ve found typing is fine for me) getting everything down on paper that worries, petrifies, or angers you on this particular morning.

The idea is to not only gain clarity about an issue, but to also leave it all on the page so that you can resume giving your precious energy to your day’s activities. I can’t say enough about morning pages. If you’re skeptical, try writing a morning paragraph for five days. You’ll see.

You should also know that beyond morning pages, Cameron writes a page-turner of a book about how to best support our creative lives. This wowza book just hit it’s 25th Anniversary printing.

I am — and will always be — a library-gal at heart, but Atomic Habits (more on this book below) and The Artist’s Way are two that will forever live on my desk giving me an inspirational-boost whenever I need it most.

Pearl Three

Our July topic is habits: how to develop an amazing habit, how to dump an annoying one.

This jewel of as story is from James Clear’s book Atomic Habits:

“After my baseball career ended, I was looking for a new sport. I joined a weightlifting team and one day an elite coach visited our gym. He had worked with thousands of athletes during his long career, including a few Olympians. I introduced myself and we began talking about the process of improvement.

‘What’s the difference between the best athletes and everyone else?’ I asked. ‘What do really successful people do that most don’t?’

He mentioned the factors you might expect: genetics, luck, talent. But then he said something I wasn’t expecting: ‘At some point it comes down to who can handle the boredom of training every day, doing the same lifts over and over and over.’

His answer surprised me because it’s a different way of thinking about work ethic. People talk about getting ‘amped up,’ to work on their goals. Whether it’s business, sports or art, you hear people say things like, ‘it all comes down to passion.’ Or, ‘you have to really want it.’ As a result, many of us get depressed when we lose focus or motivation, because we think successful people have bottomless reserves of passion. But this coach was saying that really successful people feel the same lack of motivation as everyone else. The difference is that they still find a way to show up despite the feelings of boredom.” – Mr. James Clear in his outrageously awesome book, Atomic Habits.

Pearl Four

Food Talk. The very popular Houston TV news anchor, Dominique Sachse, told her You Tube viewers a funny story. When her son was younger and went grocery shopping with her he’d beg– like most kids — for junky foods. So she told her son that if he could pronounce every ingredient on the package, she’d buy it.

Brilliant, right? I tried this method on myself. It totally slays.

Pearl Five

Successful people are successful for one simple reason: they think about failure differently.” — Seth Godin

Oh, man, this quote nails it. The instant we think of failure — in anything — in a new light, the closer we get to forming a better habit. When we turn left instead of right, no biggie, we make a U-turn and head in the “right” direction. Right? 🙂

I’m meeting a group to bike Saturday on a trail that was once a railroad track that’s been turned into a flat — thank goodness — biking trail. Apparently we bike five miles out and five miles back. They say the trail is shady. I hope “they” are right!

What are you doing this weekend to get a bit sweaty? I know it’s hot. Getting out early is the trick.

Have a good one, Thrivers!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

You know the scoop: I am an Amazon affiliate so if you buy something through a link at this site, I may receive a small commission that won’t impact your price at all.

Gorgeous snow dress found at FreyaArtAtelier.

Hello Thrivers!

As you know, I’m not a fan of “losing for Thanksgiving,” where after the guests go home we head for the rocky road. I’m certain that how we engage with food is the only way to say buh-bye to the endless yo-yo lifestyle (and when I say goodbye, I mean forever).

Also, if you haven’t yet read these two habit books, if I were a billionaire, I’d send each of you these books. They are absolutely awesome. The first is The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg and Atomic Habits by James Clear.

Both books have spent forever on the top bestseller lists.

I am proposing a Holiday Health & Weight loss Challenge.

Take a look.

Pearl One

The conductor stands outside of the train and asks Hero Boy,

Conductor: “Well… you coming?”
Hero Boy: “Where?”
Conductor: “Why to the North Pole, of course! This is the Polar Express!”

At that our hero shakes his head no, but as the train moves away something grips the boy inside and — realizing he’s about to miss something very interesting — he runs hard for the train that’s gaining speed, and jumps aboard just in time.

And now I am asking you, “well, you coming?”

We have 16 days to hop-scotch our way to Thanksgiving.

After Thanksgiving we have five more weeks (and two days) to hopscotch to Christmas. And then we have seven days after Christmas until New Year’s Day.

How would you like to wake up feeling on January 1?

Can you live now for the benefit of January one-you?

I’m getting slight chills as I type because this will be fun! I’ll be honest, I’m not in love with the word “challenge” because it indicates – to me at least – the idea of winners and losers. That’s not us.

I don’t want anyone left behind. I could have called this idea a “weight challenge,” because I know that’s what you most care about: the scale going down.

And I understand. I remember well the mornings of fury that came from stepping on a scale and seeing an abysmal number. Not a fun moment, not a fun rest of the day either.

So, when it comes to the scale, I won’t tell you what to do.

I’ll just tell you what I did. Initially (for the first two or three years) when I started losing in earnest, I put the scale away. In my heart I was going with the idea that shifting my habits would lead me to the pot of gold.

And, it did.

Think of it this way: you’ve weighed yourself in the morning for years. Leashing yourself to a morning weigh-in hasn’t been that effective, right?

But when we strengthen our food habits, the scale will follow.

How can it not? (A great journaling prompt btw.)

So our Late Summer/Fall Extravaganza-Challenge is about developing rock-solid habits that will enter our lives to be our forever allies.

If we have 16 days until Thanksgiving, I’m proposing that we plan to create two habits that matter to each of us (we’ll all be slightly different); and for the remaining month of November focusing on those two habits (see Pearl Two and Three for more info. on focusing).

Ask yourself: what would January one-me be thrilled about? The plan is to begin embedding — in our heart and souls — two strong new habits that will strengthen our weight and health plans for ourselves forever (we’ll continue these two new habits throughout September, but for now, focus on September first).

I deeply believe that losing quickly is the goofiest notion pushed by the diet industry. In the comments below, list which two habits you’d love to begin embedding by November 24.

Here are mine:

  1. Habit one: I will roast veggies early in the day to eat as a tiny dinner at 6 p.m. each night.
  2. Habit two: I will get back to eating my oatmeal bowl everyday (this habit had to be set aside when I started a liquid diet to heal my inner cheek that I bit. Braces-related.)

Climb aboard, you’re just in time.

Pearl Two

Guideline suggestions for your two new habits. Both habits you choose need to be chunked down and do-able. We know from experience that attempting to create huge, sweeping change only lasts as long as we grit our teeth and willpower our way through a new habit.

Not a recipe for habit success.

Let’s plan to incorporate small habits — that are actually huge — that are reasonable, ones we can stick with once we hit the “messy middle” and want to stop (or “forget”). These are the types of habits I’m talking about:

  • “I roast veggies and have them for my tiny dinner.”
  • If I have a habit of eating sugar throughout the day, “I limit sugar to evenings only.
  • If I’d like to eat tiny dinners, “I have a teensy meal by 6:30 p.m. and then stop eating.”
  • If after dinner I raid the kitchen and feel awful the next morning, “I go to bed early with an excellent book and I print out — and use — the following for kicking a bad habit (here).
  • I carry food in my cold tote bag every day and don’t eat fast food.
  • I eat a small bowl of petite carrots each day.
  • Notice how I use the present-tense? I don’t say: I plan to do X, or I wish I could do X, it’s “I eat a small bowl of petite carrots each day. You already have the skill, now you’re turning the skill into a habit (two totally different things).

Pearl Three

A new month and a new topic for Pearl Three! This month is perfect for talking journaling. You know why? Because journaling is the best way I know how to stay committed to a long distance goal.

I say this often because I know it to be true: your brain is so much more awesome than you’ve given it credit for. When you face difficulty or want to create something spectacular for yourself, give the job to your brain. Your brain will take you where you want to go.

One of the ways we keep ourselves focused on the goal — to create amazing habits — is through the written word.

Here’s one key to establishing a habit: write out your goal 15 times each day. Like, I eat a bowl of petite carrots every day; I eat a bowl of petite carrots every day; I eat a bowl of petite carrots every day.

After you write your 15, then journal about your two habits: what’s hard about establishing my habit today? If I slip — because of course — how do I bring myself back in alignment with my habit-goals? What new cues do I need to bring my new habit to life? (Ex: one way is to leave a bowl of petite carrots wrapped in cellophane where you can see it in the fridge so you can’t “forget” to eat them.)

Speaking of forgetting, I’ll write an entire pearl on the topic, but for now ask yourself: how do I remember to engage with my habit on a daily basis (knowing that “forgetting” is how I allow myself to ease out of a new plan when it becomes difficult or boring)?

Pearl Four

Food! You’ve got to be a coffee lover for this tip to work. Most mornings I make coffee in my large French press (sometimes I make the coffee the night before and leave it in the fridge). I add the coffee and ice cubes to the blender and then add a scoop of vanilla protein powder. I whir it up for at least a minute to make sure that nothing is lumpy because bleck-o.

Then I pour the drink over ice into my giant sippy cup (with a straw). And voila! I have a really tasty vanilla coffee.

Pearl Five

You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.” — Anonymous

Speaking of the “messy middle” I think I’m in it right now with kayaking. It’s a bit of a drive to get to the lake, and then last night the clouds were looking ominous, but we decided to go for it. It was wonderful for about fifteen minutes, and then it started to sprinkle (how amazing, I thought).

Then it rained harder giant raindrops splatting onto the lake; a gorgeous sight, nature in full splendor. And then, a rainbow appeared!! We were all so excited. It was funny to see the ducks gliding along — clearly not phased by the rain — and as if to say, “humans are so weird.”

But then it kept pouring and in a flash it wasn’t fun anymore. I paddled back to shore and drove home soaked to the bone.

While any activity will hit the “messy middle” learning how to navigate the terrain once the newness wears off is vital for our lives. Last night’s kayaking started magically, became chilly, but will forever go down as one of the best experiences ever.

Plan to create two habits you’d like to focus on for the rest of November. Share your habits in the comments below or write to me: Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com.

Let’s make it a productive fall together!!

♥, Wendy

P.S. Are you new to the Inspired Eater? Welcome!! This blog won’t make much sense until you first read the Aunt Bea post (and you’ll find Aunt Bea on this page to the right under my short bio). On your cell you’ll see it immediately following the first post. After you enter your email address, the Aunt Bea article will be sent to your email’s inbox. If it’s not there, you might check the spam folder. And always feel free to email me at Wendy@TheInspiredEater.com and I’ll get Aunt Bea right to you!

I’ve been asked if I could include something like Buy me a Coffee on the Inspired Eater. So if you feel up to sending a coffee, I am a devotee. You’ll find the coffee “button” to your right. And, as always, thank you so much for reading the Inspired Eater. ♥♥♥